Weird, Awkward, Babysitter and Kids: Early learner - FML

FML for mobile
Free

Open in app

Early learner

By Michele - 18/01/2010 00:32 - United States

Spicy

Today, while babysitting a six year-old boy, he asked me if I could show him my "boobies." I said no, that wouldn't be very appropriate. Suddenly, he pulled down his undies and pointed at his package while exclaiming, "Look, my penis is on again!" It was pointing RIGHT at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 622

You deserved it 4 064

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

The big reveal

By joe - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Easton

Today, I was teasing my 6-year-old sister about having a boyfriend. I asked her, "Did he take his shirt off?" She promptly said no. A few minutes later, she said, "But he did take his pants off." I then asked why. She said, "To show me his penis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 105

You deserved it 8 773

But he's only 5

By Anonymous - 18/12/2019 05:00

Today, I was playing with my 5 year-old neighbor. I was changing and he saw me naked. Then he went home and his parents came over. Apparently, he told them that I have beautiful boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 776

You deserved it 734

Not now, Sweetie

By Redbeard - 24/01/2020 05:00

Today, while we had my husband's boss over, my 3-year-old son decided to burst into the living room naked and yell, "Mum, look! Penis!" and wiggle it around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 201

You deserved it 372

By Embarressed... - 04/08/2010 10:25 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 618

You deserved it 11 348

By sarah6786 - 22/01/2013 02:27 - United States - Schenectady

Spicy

Today, my husband asked me to show him my boob. I began to pull the side of my shirt down when he said, "No, not that one, the big one." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 725

You deserved it 4 866

By Anonymous - 03/07/2015 20:51 - United States

Today, I had to profusely apologize to a woman after my six year old son decided to crawl between her legs at the supermarket, then look up her skirt and loudly ask why she didn't have any panties on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 122

You deserved it 4 042

By sammy18f - 24/02/2015 03:46 - United States - Brentwood

Spicy

Today, a man asked me for directions outside of a local store. After about five minutes into the conversation, I noticed he had whipped his penis out and was stroking it. He then asked me if I liked what I saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 126

You deserved it 3 784

By SadDad - 06/03/2009 01:51 - United States

Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 333

You deserved it 4 361

Caught in 4K

By Oops - 03/01/2016 19:09 - United States - San Francisco

Spicy

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house. I wanted to tease him, so I got his attention and made my orgasm face when I thought no one was looking. His thirteen year-old cousin saw and now bursts out laughing whenever he sees me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 299

You deserved it 19 597

By Anonymous - 11/02/2010 13:33 - United States

Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom. When I told him to go ahead, he said he just did. He was on my lap. He wasn't wearing pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 545

You deserved it 7 929

Next

Top comments

theman34 0

Monday 18 January 2010 9:29

damm WTF

Radi0Waves 0

Monday 18 January 2010 9:47

That kid already has so much more game than me.

Comments

911lovesme 0

Friday 29 January 2010 7:57

Can you say akward?!

KeriRox407 0

Thursday 4 February 2010 20:34

O_O . . . . . . Awkward.

xXDarkDepression 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 18:05

What a little pervert

terran0 0

Friday 12 February 2010 3:24

wow starting early

mkylem 0

Wednesday 3 March 2010 8:35

Spank him untill it goes away... or stays. Either way, make him feel your pain.

Buggy00004 0

Saturday 3 April 2010 6:35

:O woahhhhhh!!!!

LeBron2332 0

Monday 5 April 2010 0:50

that's really messed up, but it's still hilarious

dsegui4 0

Tuesday 1 June 2010 2:26

ewwww???!?!?!!!

bulleye11 0

Saturday 19 June 2010 5:44

haha my lil bro like that

sniperkitten 0

Monday 11 October 2010 19:11

Wtf @ 223, he's SIX you pedo creeper. any way Fyl op, hope the kid got told off for doing that.

11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Relatable Food Instagram Social Media Dogs Animals Cute Technology Awkward Work Relationship advice Love Sex Intimacy Embarrassing Roommate Allergies Pranks Cats Money Parents Thief Kids My ex School Crush Mental health Confused Friends

The Top

Today, my boss complained about how his performance bonus is too small, as he expected it to be the total amount accrued rather than a percentage. He also made the decision to not give any of the employees profit sharing this year, because the company didn't beat the budgeted increase in profits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 918

You deserved it 104

Today, my mom wants me to get an exorcism because piercings, tattoos, my own car, my own career, moving out of her house, and wanting zero contact with her from now on are "sure signs of demonic possession", maybe even the influence of Lucifer himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 902

You deserved it 142

The Top

Today, while at work, I let out a nasty wet fart, thinking no one would hear me since I work in a warehouse. My coworker did hear me, and replied, "WTF? Shots fired! Shots fired!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 471

You deserved it 739

Today, my son tripped into a door and slammed it shut. I'd been holding onto the door frame, leaning around to talk to a neighbour, so of course it slammed my fingers. It must be a really sharp door, because I just woke from the surgery to reattach my three amputated fingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 498

You deserved it 132

Today, the maintenance man for my building fixed my leaky sink. As he headed out the door, I said, "Thanks, Gus!" He turned around and said matter-of-factly, "My name is Eli." I've been addressing him as "Gus" for the past year and a half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 921

You deserved it 1 316

Today, it's difficult being a single woman in my city: The female/male ratio is 3:1, and the last 3 dates I've been on were with a guy who kept asking for nudes, an aggressive raging alcoholic, and what turned out to be a married man. I'm seriously considering adopting several more cats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 994

You deserved it 1 057

Today, I went grocery shopping with my 4-year-old after having some major bathroom issues. As I walked over to get bananas, she yelled out in the middle of the produce section, "DO YOU STILL HAVE DIARRHEA MOMMY?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 837

You deserved it 358

Today, I am on vacation in the Smoky Mountains with my parents. They just decided to take me to the place I was conceived seventeen years ago: a bench at a public park. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 508

You deserved it 2 669