Miscellaneous: Fighting talk

Fighting talk

By enya - 18/01/2016 22:29 - Luxembourg

Today, my dad and uncle got in an argument over money and ended up fighting in the back garden. Only, my dad is a muay thai fighter and my uncle is an MMA fighter, and they're refusing to stop until one of them is out cold. I foresee me driving them both to the hospital before midnight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 117

You deserved it 1 448

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Same thing different taste

Freaked

By Anonymous - 12/06/2023 15:00

Today, my dad joked he’d have to fight my boyfriend to find out if he’s worthy. My boyfriend grew up abused by his dad and older brothers, and has a powerful instinct to fight back. My dad is now out cold on the floor and my boyfriend is in the corner rocking back and forth and crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 257

You deserved it 170

By Jim - 19/04/2016 17:25 - United States

Today, my son is having housing issues, so I let him stay at my place for a while. Today, he found out that the quiet, dorky-looking professor who lives next door is an MMA fighter. He tried to break into the guy's house in the middle of the night and is now in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 388

You deserved it 4 202

Demon drink

By Aliiveopen - 24/08/2020 07:02 - United States - Wasilla

Today, my mom got blackout drunk and tried to fight me, my stepdad, and my brother, resulting in my stepdad leaving, my brother getting 2 holes from a metal shelf my mom tried to joust him with, and I got bit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 579

You deserved it 113

By hot_mess88 - 04/07/2009 15:24 - United States

Today, I got called to a biker bar to break up a fight between my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 123

You deserved it 2 592

By sonofaneuroticwench - 20/08/2014 20:08 - United States - Rice Lake

Today, my dad and I got into an argument, and he ended up calling me a son of a bitch. My mom heard and started arguing with him over him calling her a bitch. Three hours later, I'm now staying at my gran's house with my mom and hoping her threats of a divorce weren't for real. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 669

You deserved it 3 392

By skinsfan7592 - 08/02/2010 15:19 - United States

Today, my dad and I had an argument. Then we went outside to shovel the snow out of the driveway. I heard him yelling and figured he was just yelling at me some more, so I turned my iPod up so I couldn't hear him anymore. Turns out he had fallen, cracked a rib, and needed help up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 152

You deserved it 44 094

Alpha

By Anonymous - 09/02/2022 18:01

Today, both my dad and boyfriend are serious weightlifters, plus my dad boxed in the army, and my boyfriend is a mixed martial artist. Ever since they met, they've been circling each other like bears in the forest trying to work out which is bigger and meaner before the fight even begins. They're both so childish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 064

You deserved it 285

Fun for all the family

By Anonymous - 14/04/2021 02:00

Today, my mom and dad got into a fight, during which my dad said to my mom that her health conditions were of her own doing. Because of that, I got pissed and had a fight with my dad, taking my mom's side. Turns out, my mom took his side and ratted me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 769

You deserved it 282

The protector

By Dad - 21/08/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I paid my daughter a surprise visit, only to see her husband beating her. I charged in and slammed him into the wall. She screamed at me to stop. They'd recently gotten into martial arts and were sparring, and now he's got a broken arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 503

You deserved it 286

Don't hate the player…

By Anonymous - 29/03/2023 14:00

Today, my son is such an idiot that he forgot he invited both his girlfriends to my brother's funeral. They started a punch-up over him and everyone ended up joining in since we're a very argumentative family. People got arrested and in the end both girls agreed to share my son, who was unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 068

You deserved it 271

rnayyyyy 12

Tuesday 19 January 2016 10:33

I'd actually like to see who would take out who first...

onlychildFTW 33

Tuesday 19 January 2016 10:33

Why drive them? They are tough guys obviously. They can drive themselves since thy are so tough.

Comments

noahghosthand 12

Wednesday 20 January 2016 0:20

ok I'll be taking bets on who will win

tomvertigo 17

Wednesday 20 January 2016 1:16

Call the police? Call an ambulance? Neighborhood watch? Anything other than posting an FML?

Bugg27 15

Wednesday 20 January 2016 1:38

Oh wow lol I can't wait to see the follow up on this...

SexyCheeksIzKool 15

Wednesday 20 January 2016 2:55

Well... Who won!?

LieutenantKitty 8

Wednesday 20 January 2016 3:39

Your dad is a TIE Fighter? Cool!

AScooterman 12

Wednesday 20 January 2016 4:07

You should probably sell tickets that way you can pay the medical bills easier

clair_brodie 35

Wednesday 20 January 2016 5:46

They have to get tired at some point. Just encourage them to do a collar choke to make it go by quicker.

NOXUS125 11

Wednesday 20 January 2016 6:12

Fatality!

Hildy93 21

Wednesday 20 January 2016 6:33

Were you writing this comment as they were fighting?

sillygirl247 14

Wednesday 20 January 2016 8:20

Wish I could of seen that.

Keywords

Miscellaneous Family DIY Cats Work Poopoo peepee Awkward Management Frustration Am I overreacting? Capitalism Coworkers Relatable Transportation Animals ADHD Dogs Dating Love Mental health Health Anxiety Technology Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, I went looking for a childhood doll - I remembered that my mum kept her in her bedside cabinet. I could see the doll at the back, but there was stuff in the way, so I reached in and took some of it out, only to find I was holding one of my mum's toys… a big black rubber cock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 242

You deserved it 6 977

Today, I brought my little sons into work with me. I introduced them to my boss, who said to my shy kids, "You boys don't know me, do you? I'm Janice." The older one lit up and said, "Oh, I know you, mommy complains about you all the time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 555

You deserved it 17 170

The Top

Today, I woke up with a hangover and a pounding headache and tried to take an ibuprofen with a glass of water. I missed my mouth and threw the pill directly into my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 132

You deserved it 468

Today, my friend and I were brushing our teeth, standing side by side. We both have a sympathy gag reflex. He brushed his tongue and gagged, which caused me to gag. So we had a never ending gag-fest until we both began throwing up and couldn't stop until one of us could manage to hold it in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 165

You deserved it 3 091

Today, I heard vibrating from inside my husband's desk drawer. Since he's away for the weekend, I investigated. I found an unfamiliar cellphone with an inbound call. I answered it. Turns out, it was his mistress. Neither of us can get a hold of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 155

You deserved it 3 442

Today, it was my first day at my first job, I got up early, got ready, waited an hour for HR to call. I called them instead and they didn't answer, so I wrote an email to the partners. It turns out I got the first day date wrong. Some first impression. FML

I agree, your life sucks 747

You deserved it 449

Today, I broke a heel and fell. A real handsome guy helped me up, so being single I said I didn’t know how I might repay him, hoping he might ask me out. He asked me if I’d be willing to go to the public toilets round the corner and suck him off. Why do I even bother trying to find a nice guy? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 444

You deserved it 262

Today, I found out that my parents bought a stripper pole, my mom even hired a stripper to teach her some "moves." I'm scared to go in their room now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 304

You deserved it 2 648