First time, last time

By tuggernuts - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Spicy
Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML
I agree, your life sucks 14 595
You deserved it 44 772
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Top comments

chocolatepandas 2

So that's why Justin Bieber's voice is so high...just kidding he doesn't have a penis.

Comments

downtime 12

I dunno, 7/8ths of an inch doesn't seem like much to me. I assume the 6-8 inch range was based on the inability to tell real size rule? Mine is 12.5 inches in that system, which when converted back to real units of measurement is much less impressive...

1 0
TheVoicesTalk 3

More comments about JB. In other words, I feel for the OP's nut.

0 0
ak_6694 16

This isn't all bad news, think of it like this. It's a great story to pick up chicks with, and if they ask to see what happened, you are totally justified in whipping it out! That, and a male soprano is called a falsetto

2 3
CallMeBloo 31

270- No, no it isn't. Falsetto is a part of the male vocal range. Even basses have a falsetto. You might be thinking of a castrato, which is a male who sings soprano due to having been castrated prior to puberty. Nowadays a male soprano is generally just called a male soprano.

2 0
Dahgman 4

To use or not use a penis pump...that's a hard one.

1 1
jakeowns2 3

Just casually reading people's Internet war comments and laughing.

0 1
dolceandkabana 1

Your a numbnut

1 2
EvilGenius913 2

Wow, don't you wanna team up with his publicist?

0 1
5t3ff1k4h 44

Actually, the average size is less than that, countryboy.

1 0