Intimacy: #ForeverAlone - FML

#ForeverAlone

By WithoutLove - 30/08/2011 05:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, I realized the closest thing I have to a love life is organizing my porn folder by category. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 694

You deserved it 33 046

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/03/2015 19:35 - Bahrain - Manama

Spicy

Today, I spent 5 hours organizing my porn collection on my computer. What the hell am I doing with my life? FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 406

You deserved it 27 671

By MyHeadHurts - 20/01/2012 10:42 - Ireland

Spicy

Today, I got bored looking at porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 210

You deserved it 39 611

By redhanded - 28/05/2011 09:24 - United States

Spicy

Today, I noticed my hidden porn folder on my laptop had been renamed to "LOL". I live with my teenage daughter, and no one else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 733

You deserved it 61 813

Old school cool

By Chimychunga - 01/08/2010 06:47 - United States

Spicy

Today, while helping my dad look for his watch, I found his porn collection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 327

You deserved it 5 644

Hyperfocused

By Anonymous - 23/11/2023 12:00 - United States

Today, I set out to organize my media files over several old hard drives, but I got so engrossed in creating intricate folders and subfolders that I forgot what I was organizing in the first place. My computer is now a labyrinth of folders titled "Stuff," "Things," and "What is this even?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 521

By Anonymous - 04/04/2009 14:44 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I logged onto my computer to access a video from my porn stash. However, the folder was empty except for my favourite file. Thinking that a virus deleted everything, I was thankful my favourite file remained. When I opened it, I saw a video of my parents telling me not to masturbate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104 730

You deserved it 45 204

If I could turn back time…

By Anonymous - 15/02/2024 20:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, I got caught checking out my porn collection while working. The embarrassment is compounded by the fact that I work from home, and I only flashed the folder on screen, but it was enough for coworkers to notice and now call me "King Dong". FML

I agree, your life sucks 98

You deserved it 626

By hell! - 02/12/2008 08:27 - France

Spicy

Today, I discovered that my 15 year old girl had hidden a disgusting porn film in the "future career" folder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 178

You deserved it 6 991

By Anonymous - 28/01/2011 19:59 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I got home from working late and decided to write a cute email to my girlfriend since I haven't seen her in two weeks. I was about to finish it off when my door swung open, and in a panic, I opened another tab to hide my email. It was porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 809

You deserved it 43 599

By Anonymous - 28/04/2009 09:01 - Singapore

Spicy

Today, my teacher called me into his office so he that he could pass me some information for my project. Just as he plugged in my thumbdrive, he opened the folder named "School Work". That was the folder name I used to disguise my porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 188

You deserved it 110 252

Next

Top comments

audiophileMom 11

Tuesday 30 August 2011 11:45

You do this alphabetically? From Anal to Z?

DjeePee 24

Tuesday 30 August 2011 11:55

Woops sir, I see you have made a mistake. 'Today, I realized the closest thing I have to a *remove love* *insert sex* life is organizing my **** folder by category. FML' **** is not love, my dear. Not even close.

Comments

s24sammy 8

Tuesday 30 August 2011 13:30

Nice list. lol

perdix 29

Tuesday 30 August 2011 13:33

You don't have to be alone. Go on Craigslist and search for hot Asian chicks. Find one you like and have her come over and organize your **** for you. Those people are so good with them computers!

kg124 0

Tuesday 30 August 2011 13:33

Maybe that's why you don't have said love life.

swasticop 0

Tuesday 30 August 2011 13:45

If you're worried about it, get rid of the **** and go get a girl

Tomcat99_fml 3

Tuesday 30 August 2011 13:58

U want a life? Delete all your **** and go outside your house - anywhere

OfficeNinja 5

Tuesday 30 August 2011 13:59

so did you file your goat **** under G for goat, A for animal, or F for farmville?

derekwb 0

Tuesday 30 August 2011 14:20

Yo can u organize mine?

newjerseyguy 0

Tuesday 30 August 2011 14:29

You need a hobby that involves you leaving your house.

justanotherbird 19

Tuesday 30 August 2011 14:38

Take control of your life. Delete that shit and leave the house!

sarahrocrocrocks 5

Tuesday 30 August 2011 14:48

well then go do something about it, dont just be a bum. get out of the house and meet people.

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The Top

Today, I wanted to show my friends my cat’s “high-five” trick. I held out my hand, and instead of a high-five, my cat scratched and bit me instead. I yelped, and my friends burst into laughter. I had to bandage my hand, all whilst they joked about “cat training.” FML

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You deserved it 375

If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!...

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 23

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when we heard a screech. My two cats were having it harder than us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 323

You deserved it 7 251

Today, my blind date tried to sell me a vacuum. I bought it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 946

You deserved it 8 289

Today, I'd stayed up all night to finish a detailed report. By the time I'd printed it I was late for work so I jumped in my car. Driving down the street, I saw my papers fly off the roof of my car. It was raining out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 231

You deserved it 8 192

Today, my four year old got mad that he couldn't find his favorite character on the Wii. So, he decided to smash the Wii remote into my $700 LCD TV, shattering the screen. That was the only TV in the house, and the $80 service plan I bought doesn't cover accidental damage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 369

You deserved it 8 779

Today, my therapist made me take a test to see what level my depression was at. There was a whole bunch of questions with multiple answers to choose from. One question was, "Do you find it harder to make decisions?" I couldn't decide which answer to pick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 563

You deserved it 323

Today, my father, who is going through a serious mid-life crisis, walked into my room, told me to "sit the fuck down," and spent the next two hours ranting about how the Lord of the Rings books prophesy the end of the world this December, and that Sauron is an analogy for "corrupt bankers." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 725

You deserved it 2 218