Intimacy: Get in there!

Get in there!

By Menareidiots - 24/02/2009 23:32 - United States

Today, my guy friend and I were in his dorm room watching a movie when he started kissing me. Things heated up so we moved things over to his bed. He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate had been up there the whole time and he wanted a high-five. So they high-fived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90 816

You deserved it 22 722

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Same thing different taste

Wham bam thank you ma'am

By Noname - 11/03/2009 07:37 - United States

Today, while I was showering in my dorm, a hand reached through the curtain and grabbed my ass. I hit the person on the other side of the curtain. He opened the curtain, thinking that I was his girlfriend. He apologized, then went on to have sex with his girlfriend in the shower stall next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 933

You deserved it 3 630

Self-sabotage

By Anonymous - 15/11/2016 09:20

Today, I was hanging out with a guy friend I hadn't seen for ages. The sexual tension was off the charts. We were making out and think were progressing, hands were roaming to both nether regions when I freaked out and blurted out, "But aren't we just friends?" We then sat and watched TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 872

You deserved it 12 861

Second base?

By armtits and big pits - 05/04/2014 07:14 - United States - Cape Coral

Today, I went to my crush's house. We were watching a movie when suddenly he started kissing me. As it deepened he began to feel around. He was groping my armpit the whole time but I was too embarrassed that my underarm could pass for my boobs to redirect him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 388

You deserved it 8 340

The moment when…

By wastedlove - 23/06/2009 15:14 - United States

Today, I had sex with this guy who I like very much. As he went to leave, I decided to give him one last thrill. I reached down his pants and started to rub and stroke him. He abruptly pulled my hand out. When I asked why, he pointed behind me. My mom had watched the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 108

You deserved it 74 045

By someoneelsessaliva - 05/06/2010 06:59 - Australia

Today, my two friends and I went to the movies. One of my friends brought my crush. They started making out, leaning over the armrest, until they were practically in my lap. Saliva got on my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 460

You deserved it 4 195

What a jerk!

By traumatized house keeper - 08/09/2017 13:00 - Germany - Munster

Today, while cleaning the hostel, I had to make some beds in a dorm room. There were three guys in the room, one of whom was sitting on a bed. He looked me straight in the eye and I gave him a big smile before I realized he was jerking off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 472

You deserved it 427

Freak out

By Anonymous - 02/01/2013 19:02 - Canada - Belle River

Today, at a house party, I finally got the guy I've been seeing alone in his room. We started making out, and I got on top of him to take control. He responded by saying he couldn't do it because he needed to go make pizza for his friends, and then bolted out of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 060

You deserved it 9 901

By Jack - 26/10/2009 06:32 - United States

Today, I was in minding my own business in bed in my dorm room. It was dark and my roommate came over, intending to slap my ass really hard. The problem is, I was lying face up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 997

You deserved it 3 007

Classic lineup

By Phoellie - 28/08/2009 11:43 - United Kingdom

Today, as I arrived at my house after a two week holiday, I opened the door and heard footsteps upstairs. I went up and found my boyfriend naked in bed. We had great sex. Afterwards I found my best friend naked in the wardrobe. Turns out they'd also had great sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 321

You deserved it 5 232

By Eeeek - 26/08/2010 21:17 - Bulgaria

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex in a rarely used room at school. We got carried away and found ourselves locked in. We slept there overnight. We woke up when the cleaning lady found us the next morning and were greeted by worried parents and school staff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 127

You deserved it 52 906

PureGold 0

Wednesday 25 February 2009 1:56

"So they high-fived." HAHA. Wow, guys are so clueless.

bobdole 0

Wednesday 25 February 2009 2:02

he's my hero

Comments

case_fml 0

Wednesday 4 March 2009 19:21

No. It's not awesome. They sound like douche bags.

Roberto_66 0

Wednesday 4 March 2009 23:28

Hahahaha! That's so cute!

strawmaster 0

Thursday 5 March 2009 7:23

thats so awesome, those guys rock

r10t3r 0

Thursday 5 March 2009 16:01

This is just the funniest thing...that you were on a bunk bed...

TheGodsofJelly 6

Thursday 5 March 2009 20:29

i ******* laughed so hard at 22's coments

mic732 0

Thursday 5 March 2009 22:58

This is a legendary momment no one shall forget its a pure epic win momment i signed up just to comment on this

thedragonsword 0

Friday 6 March 2009 4:02

Take it as a compliment, that must have been something he had wanted to happen (sex with you, not the high five)

lifehatesmedamn 0

Friday 6 March 2009 23:43

i'm not gonna lie. this is pretty priceless. it's pretty effing hilarious, and feel good about it. It was a compliment. I love the way you worded this though. "He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate ... wanted a high-five. So they high-fived." hilarious. this made me laugh so hard. I agree with #22 - they're my heroes.