Intimacy: Hands-on

Hands-on

By poolgirl789 - 03/09/2013 06:30 - United Kingdom - Bradford

Today, I had to feed an elderly man in the care home in which I work while he was whacking off. Our work policy states that I have to pretend not to notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 771

You deserved it 4 753

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Same thing different taste

Rubbing one out on the sly

By Anonymous - 05/08/2015 17:56 - United States - Camarillo

Today, I went over to talk to my boss. I must have snuck up on her because she was masturbating through her pants. She stopped and I had to chat away, pretending I didn't notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 543

You deserved it 2 450

Not funny anymore

By Anonymous - 29/11/2019 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, at work, the security threw out an old man in his 80s who had been caught masturbating while hiding in the ladies' changing room. I thought it was funny until my manager told me to clean up that very same changing room with the old man spunk all over the wall and floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 250

You deserved it 1 865

By therewasnocurtain - 06/04/2015 20:07 - United States - Lewiston

Today, I visited my sick grandpa for a few hours in the hospital. His roommate, also an elderly man, wouldn't stop masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 123

You deserved it 2 543

By today - 17/03/2010 06:12

Today, I put on some goggles on in the pool, only to go underwater and see an old man "discreetly" jerking it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 123

You deserved it 4 417

By sadfantasy - 31/03/2016 06:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, the mentally-challenged teen who sometimes comes into my restaurant gave me a hug as usual. I thought it was sweet, until a coworker let me know he immediately goes and jacks off in the bathroom after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 013

You deserved it 1 639

By Anonymous - 21/08/2012 17:39 - United States - Charlotte

Today, I walked into the restroom at work, only to find my boss stroking and playing with himself. I have my annual performance assessment with him in an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 640

You deserved it 2 338

By aragmir - 18/12/2016 06:10 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, while working at a nursing home, I was alone in the station and figured I could sneak one out. It wound up being very loud, and I could hear the faint snickering of a patient in the next room. Every time he saw me for the rest of the day he would burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 701

You deserved it 2 875

By Sleeper_C3ll - 04/02/2009 23:04 - United States

Today, I heard a man pleasuring himself in the stall next to me during my post lunch deuce. I was washing my hands when my boss walked out of the stall. I can no longer look at him in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 118

You deserved it 2 877

You wanker

By dinosaucer - 12/10/2011 00:19 - United States

Today, I was accused of masturbating during work. I was actually just getting something out of my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 304

You deserved it 3 563

Eye-bleach please

By Anonymous - 27/04/2020 14:00

Today, I have been having to work in a residence of people with disabilities when I normally do community work with disabled people and usually enjoy it. I have seen not one, but two elderly mens' genitals today when my actual job would never require me to see any. I didn’t sign up for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 505

You deserved it 310

_GoodGuy 11

Tuesday 3 September 2013 16:12

Can't wait to reach old age, I can do anything I want ;)

crazytwinsmom 25

Tuesday 3 September 2013 16:12

I would think he'd be able to feed himself if he can whack off.

Comments

Wiz_Of_Oz 17

Wednesday 4 September 2013 10:48

How pleasant for you.

JoseIsAdork 31

Wednesday 4 September 2013 12:08

at least he was choking the chicken and not choking on it, I'm a glass half full kind of guy

tarbaby6193 6

Wednesday 4 September 2013 12:25

It's ok as long as there was no eye contact

blackwidowtaco 31

Wednesday 4 September 2013 13:28

Even if op looked away, the jerking motion and sound alone would still be too disturbing to endure being in the same room with him.

elcee1987 18

Wednesday 4 September 2013 12:51

So that's why you had to feed him? Cause his hand was busy? In all seriousness, this is damn nasty. I'd prob sue for sexual harassment, but I'm an American. We love lawsuits.