Hefty

By Fatty - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I was making out with this guy that I like. In an attempt to be romantic, he tried to pick me up and press me against the wall. He couldn't lift me off the ground. FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 776
You deserved it 16 295

Top comments

Don't worry. It's not because you're heavy. Earth's gravity has changed recently.

Maybe next time stick to the bed. Better on you your back, and his arms.

Comments

Maybe next time stick to the bed. Better on you your back, and his arms.

riceicle1 6

Agreed Shes fat or he's weak

"more cushion for the pushin" I always say.

49 and everytime you say it again, it gets more and more boring

danielleeycakes 3

my ex tried something like this and he dropped me lol.. I'm not fat, so just because he couldn't lift her doesn't mean OP is fat.

Jonscarl 0
glorialaura21 8

Notice how nearly all of the comments above say "her" or "she". Now notice how the OP's sex is male...Am I really the only one to notice that here?

70, a nice strong pair of prescription glasses might help you read the gender sign properly.

glorialaura21 8

CRAP CRAP CRAP. You're right. -face palm- im never using this thing while half asleep again. thanks anyways.

RedPillSucks 31

@70. It says (Woman) in the gender section on my browser.

MrBoredGuy 1

ah ha! canadians can be fat!! stop giving us Americans shit

doesn't mean your fat he needs to hit the gym!

Denikk 0

she's fat... or am i the only one who noticed her username is "fatty"? xD

elephants17 7

nick you look almost exactly like Andy samberg in the picture!!

RouletteRed 6

well its not entirely his fault. i mean how much do you weigh? not can pick up a heavy partner. PS. this comment is in notnsayin you are. its really just a question

RouletteRed 6
Fobbs 2

Better that then , picking you up and dropping you!

I kinda do don't I? my real twin is that guy off wizards of waverly places, I think his name is Justin. I once had a little girl ask me for an autograph haha

SunDropGirl 0

111 actually not really my boyfriend does that to me all the time most the time I just end up in his arms with my legs aroun his waste though if we are in that position.

aerosmith3312 2

Yeah I do that to my girlfriend all the time. She always tries to tell me how heavy she is, but she still enjoys being lifted up and carried like that

SomeRussianGirl 3

My boyfriend lifted me but he dropped me after a couple minutes lol I'm 97 LBS.

aww you're not fat. you could still find other ways to be romantic like a walk on a beach, or go on a date :)

What if he is in a wheelchair? Then he cant walk on the beach.

then why would he be trying to pick her up and press her against the wall?

lmfao... most people don't have a beach to walk on at their convenience.

Namaste_fml 2

yeah, it'd still be considered a "walk" on the beach though, it's just a term for the activity itself. you're being ridiculous. my sister is in a wheelchair and she refers to the activity as a "walk" anyway, even though she cannot truly walk herself, because it's just what it's called. =/

FreebirdIII 1

Or stick your head in a fence.

stfu 114 you repeated yourself like 3 effin times.

I don't see how a change in location will make her any lighter.

laurbear12 3
theten_fml 9

I agree. not just because I like your hair

you mean that it's embaressing for the guy to have a fat girlfriend?

No it's embarrassing for him unable to pick her up. She would have to be truly obese otherwise I feel like.

Maybe he was just weak? ;) Next time just stick to the bed!

Were you making out at Mcdonalds when he attempted to ram you into a wall? Time to flee the scene and never return so you won't be recognizes plus you'll lose the weight so he can actually lift your fat arse off the ground. Killing two birds with one stone.

McDonalds* recognized* sorry. Major dislike for auto correct at the moment.

thts a dick thing to say and at least he tried to be romantic shit And really? arse? soooooi lame dude get rid of the accent stupid ass brit

Lol she's no Brit. I'm guessing she pretends to be because of her use of the word arse but what she doesn't know or she forgot is that Brits spell recognize as recognise :)

bigmoney12 3

either your fat or he's weak

She's probably not really fat, otherwise her man wouldn't try to pick her up in the first place. I know girls that are a size 6 who call themselves fat. She probably weighs more than she looks, and he needs to hit the gym. OP, getting picked up and pushed against the wall is overrated, it actually kinda sucks. Stick to the bed or the floor next time.

ivan_m25 0

how could i have missed that. lmao

Don't worry. It's not because you're heavy. Earth's gravity has changed recently.

Tonys_kitten6 0

Yes because of all the somewhat recent earthquakes it caused the earths rotation to shift ya know that stuff that makes his comment true

It doesn't matter if you're fat, that guy seems to like you nonetheless. Appreciate the attempt!

To clear it up for all commenters in the future... yes OP is fat. Her username is "fatty". And to #7s reply to his own comment changing "Mcdonalds" to "McDonalds", you don't have to apologize. Not even the grammar Nazis give a shit (with the exception of Snickerdoodles, who will not be commenting for a long time).

thebestof1984 0

Op could be referring herself to be a fatty because he couldn't pick her up. For all we know she could be a 100lb chick that has a weak ass boy.

Daerauko 0

what happened to snickerdoodles? lol I imagine when she finally gets back on she'll be the holder of the most thumbs down on a comment... or most comments.

fthku 13

OP's usename being "fatty" does not necessarily mean she actually is fat. OP, don't feel bad. I'm sure he was just as embaressed.

Don't use the word nazi like that it's mean to the nazis

Namaste_fml 2

so if you call yourself something that's proof it's true? such sound logic... this makes about as much sense as people telling someone they know nothing about and have never seen that they aren't fat, jsyk...

lose some weight :/ either way though, unless you're really fluffy, he should be able to lift you. however I think I gatta say ydi :/