Animals, Cats and Fire: Human! Come quick! - FML

Human! Come quick!

By He got a lot of treats for that - 09/03/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, I woke up at the ungodly hour of 4AM to my cat clawing at my door and yelling at me. Normally I'd just wait until he stopped, but he was persistent, so I got up and opened the door to see what he wanted. He then corralled me to the laundry room. My dryer was on fire. Good boy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 687

You deserved it 134

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Same thing different taste

By nocatlover - 21/01/2010 21:40 - United States

Today, I woke up to the news that my son had put the cat in the dryer the night before. He didn't turn it on, and the cat is just fine, but now I need a new dryer so my clothes won't smell like cat urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 709

You deserved it 3 398

By benji - 01/11/2011 19:02 - United States

Today, I was hurriedly doing laundry. I threw a second load in the dryer and slammed the door shut. All of a sudden, I heard scratching and whining coming from the dryer. My cat probably hates me now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 397

You deserved it 38 591

Signs of distress

By Anonymous - 29/04/2022 04:00

Today, I was woken up by my cat, who normally doesn't bother me in the morning, meowing desperately and trying to get me to wake up. Fearing that something was very wrong, I jumped out of bed. He gestured for me to follow him, so I did. I followed him all the way to the kitchen, where he proceeded to puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 035

You deserved it 212

By scratchpost - 28/10/2010 12:07 - United States

Today, my cat woke me up by sharpening his claws on my breast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 927

You deserved it 4 622

By HannaMD - 26/01/2015 15:21 - Canada

Today, my cat had the bright idea of giving birth in the dryer, on top of all my new white towels. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 517

You deserved it 5 956

By Cat Piss - 15/12/2013 16:58 - United States - Lavon

Today, I was woken up to the sound of my cat peeing on the pillow next to mine. When I yelled at him, he jumped over my face and off the bed. He was still peeing the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 679

You deserved it 6 883

By Anonymous - 18/12/2015 11:40 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, I woke up to noises from downstairs. I practically pissed my pants and called the cops. Turned out it was just my cat being a dickhead in the living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 734

You deserved it 5 812

Obey, human

By Anonymous - 28/02/2023 12:00

Today, after struggling to fall asleep due to stress, my cat decided to wake me up by standing on me and meowing until I got up. Just for me to show him that my boyfriend had already put food in his dish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 711

You deserved it 167

LET ME OUT

By jynxisadouchebag - 27/02/2015 00:08 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was doing laundry, and decided to wash my cat's blanket. He chased me down the stairs into the basement, and I slightly closed the door behind me so he wouldn't follow me. He pushed the door shut, which automatically locks. I was trapped down there for 3 hours until my mom came home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 429

You deserved it 5 854

Surprise!

By BadKitty - 11/09/2016 13:37 - Australia - Invermay

Today, I woke up to a loud bang. Thinking someone had broken in, I grabbed my hunting knife and ran downstairs, only to find my TV on the floor, completely destroyed, and my cat casually sitting next to it without a care in the world. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 939

You deserved it 1 278

Next

Top comments

D J's MOM 17

Sunday 10 March 2024 14:20

I already knew that cats are awesome. yours is amazing. he's getting lots of extra treats right?

IHaveThePower 16

Sunday 10 March 2024 17:36

You have a very smart, good kitteh there. Give him lots of pettings and treats for us.

Comments

D J's MOM 17

Sunday 10 March 2024 14:20

I already knew that cats are awesome. yours is amazing. he's getting lots of extra treats right?

IHaveThePower 16

Sunday 10 March 2024 17:36

You have a very smart, good kitteh there. Give him lots of pettings and treats for us.

jcarter25 12

Thursday 14 March 2024 1:46

Well, your life sucks but at least you still have it! Good job kitty!

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Friday 22 March 2024 4:08

That cat deserves a medal - and all the treats he wants! Good job, kitty!

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You deserved it 3 893

Today, after arriving home from work I found that my dog took a dump down the air conditioning vents on the floor. Now the whole house smells so good. FML

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You deserved it 5 278

Today, my two year-old cousin was having a temper tantrum. I decided to give him a flashlight because playing with it usually distracts him. It didn't. Instead, he hit me in the face with it as hard as possible, leaving a bruise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 068

You deserved it 24 989

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I agree, your life sucks 7 232

You deserved it 359

Today, I went to bed, falling asleep quickly; however, my cat decided to show up and lay on top of me, making me so uncomfortably hot and sweaty that my body immediately woke me up so I wouldn't die of a heat stroke. It's fucking 1:00 AM. He NEVER sleeps with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 630

You deserved it 199

Today, my sister called me at work and told me our elderly mom had passed away. I dropped everything and rushed home, to find out she was fine, and that my sister was just pranking me. When I explained this to my boss, he accused me of lying to get out of work, and I was fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 613

You deserved it 86