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I am a lineman for the countyyyyyy…

By Anon - 13/03/2014 00:11 - United States - Greensburg

Today, I started my first job as a power line technician. My boss's first words to me were, "I have a good feeling about you, kid!" That would've been great if he hadn't said, "Although, the last time I had a good feeling, the guy died" right afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 657

You deserved it 3 694

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Unforgettable

By Anonymous - 25/10/2019 12:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, it was my first day of work at my new job. I got dressed and arrived early, only to find out that the store had closed due to a power outage. Then I found out that the person who'd hired me had totally forgotten about hiring me anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 945

You deserved it 125

By :( - 06/06/2013 23:37 - United States

Today, at my new job at a funeral home, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't "lighten the hell up" while dealing with our grieving clients. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 920

You deserved it 4 758

My big day

By ReadyFreddy - 29/03/2025 04:00 - United States - North Hollywood

Today, I was starting a new job. I got up early, showered, did my hair, put on my uniform, had a good cry because I was scared/excited that I was starting a future where I will be financially free for the first time. Then my boss texted me because one of his back of house employees is sick and he can’t train me until tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 87

By jobless - 06/11/2014 02:03 - United States - San Francisco

Today, for the first time since I can remember, I went in to work feeling positive, and that I could make good things happen. At the end of the day, my employment was terminated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 041

You deserved it 3 237

By TacoMan32 - 06/12/2016 04:26 - Canada

Today, after months of unemployment, I finally started at a new job. The building burnt down on my very first shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 183

You deserved it 641

By Anonymous - 26/10/2010 00:22 - United States

Today, I went to my first day of work in over 2 years. As I approached the boss, he asked me what my name was. Turned out they hired the wrong person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 652

You deserved it 2 382

Toxic workplace goals!

By Anonymous - 22/04/2013 23:37 - Australia - Mona Vale

Today, I walked out of a job interview feeling confident because I'd really hit it off with the interviewer. He called me an hour later to tell me that I didn't get the job, since he was afraid we'd "get along too well and never get any work done." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 856

You deserved it 3 739

By piece of crap car - 04/01/2017 06:27 - United States - Portland

Today, I was supposed to start my first day of work at my dream job. However, my car had other plans and refused to start. When I called my boss to tell him I was going to be late, he told me not to come in at all and fired me on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 845

You deserved it 1 061

Unnerved

By Greenskies - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - France - Corneilla-del-vercol

Today, I was talking to my boss at the end of an awesome internship. He said he was really satisfied with my work, and that he had considered hiring me. Turns out he decided not to because I smile too much, and it freaks him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 999

You deserved it 2 012

By Anonymous - 13/07/2017 21:30

Today, the manager that hired me and worked for years to inspire and connect her staff was laid to rest. Hours before the funeral, her replacement told me he wanted my two weeks notice on his desk tonight. I've been a model employee, he just doesn't like me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 582

You deserved it 284

theonecasey 27

Thursday 13 March 2014 7:40

Be safe!

ThatFancyPenn 18

Thursday 13 March 2014 7:41

"On another note, welcome to the crew!"

Comments

dogbonelove 8

Thursday 13 March 2014 19:47

Buddy you dead

dasfro 2

Thursday 13 March 2014 19:50

Is it bad that I laughed hysterically after reading this?

Inkay 13

Thursday 13 March 2014 19:57

Maybe he just has a sense of humor?

Kfortch 9

Thursday 13 March 2014 19:57

Lol that's awesome. Sure he wasn't just kidding ?

GirlGamer12345 22

Thursday 13 March 2014 20:20

He was probably kidding. Don't it seriously OP.

squarecircles 13

Thursday 13 March 2014 20:32

Unless he has a super dark sense of humour, it was obviously the wrong thing to say. And even if it were true, what are the chances?

ValiaMaddox 4

Thursday 13 March 2014 20:33

At least he has a sense of humour.

grabyourhooks 12

Thursday 13 March 2014 21:36

Welcome to the brotherhood.

Sniper_Chick4110 20

Friday 14 March 2014 1:43

Good bit of advice my father gave me, don't ever put the wires in your mouth when working with electricity.

tfowl61692 14

Friday 14 March 2014 4:26

Godspeed! !

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The Top

Today, I asked my son to keep my new girlfriend secret from his mom until our divorce was final, and he ran straight to her. She told the judge I was unfaithful and wants more money from our settlement. My son doesn't give a shit about snitching on me, because she's giving him a percentage of the new settlement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 398

You deserved it 1 959

Today, my boyfriend looked at me and suggestively told me to take a shower. He's leaving for two days so I humored him, thinking he wanted to do it in the shower. I waited for 20 minutes before he knocked on the door, telling me he needed to shower as well. He just wanted me to take a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 737

You deserved it 29 735

The Top

Today, I told my boyfriend that I don't like his facial hair and that he should shave it off. He replied, "You first." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 277

You deserved it 48 000

Today, some of my relatives are staying over. My husband was late from work, so I rang him. Apparently, he remembers the family drama and the screaming matches from last time, so he’s checked himself into a hotel until my circus of an extended family are gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 326

You deserved it 1 236

Today, my daughter lost a tooth. I wanted to make the Tooth Fairy experience extra special, so I dipped her doll's feet in paint to leave “tracks” from the window to her bed. As I was adding the finishing touches and spreading glitter, I tripped on a toy, faceplanted and lost my own tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 149

You deserved it 395

Today, while sorting through my clothes, I found one of my ex's old sweaters. After a lot of thought and difficulty, I threw it out. I felt empowered, until my father later rifled through my trash and claimed the sweater for himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 642

You deserved it 3 967

Today, my professor informed me that if I didn't "show more commitment" to my choral ensemble he would give my spot to a "more interested young woman." I missed class to see my neurologist. Apparently my seizures are a symptom of lack of commitment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 400

You deserved it 2 772

Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that I deserved to be punished. He didn’t fine me, instead he sent me to the naughty step for five minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 720

You deserved it 185