Health, Painful and Injury: It's the thought that counts

It's the thought that counts

By Cracky - 27/11/2012 14:32 - United States - Baltimore

Today, my husband ran a nice warm bubble bath with extra bubbles. I undressed and slid down into the tub only to have the most ungodly pain go up my backside. Turns out he knocked his razor into the water when he added the bubbles. I now have two butt cracks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 567

You deserved it 2 013

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Same thing different taste

By Erin - 10/05/2016 02:18 - United States - Springfield

Today, I fell in the shower, landing ass-crack first onto a can of shaving cream, which split my butt straight down the crack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 471

You deserved it 1 284

Arsehole

By Anonymous - 25/06/2022 14:00

Today, I was taking my shower, as usual. As I was putting soap on my behind, I heard a pop. I also felt a burning sensation near my butthole. I have a blood filled bubble in my arse, which got infiltrated with soap. I have a drums lesson in a bit. My butt is stinging. FML

I agree, your life sucks 809

You deserved it 152

Painful relief

By Anonymous - 11/04/2016 07:25 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I tried to relieve my back pain by lounging in a jacuzzi at my mother's house. All was going well until I accidentally knocked an opened container of bath salts into the tub, which got sucked into the jet system, shooting tiny, sharp, barely dissolved pieces of salt into my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 565

You deserved it 3 403

By helpme - 15/07/2013 17:25 - Canada - Sudbury

Today, while waxing my bikini line, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me which caused me to close my legs. I am now sitting in the sink with my best friend pouring hot water "down there" trying to remove the wax. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 572

You deserved it 4 664

By susan - 24/02/2010 01:26 - United States

Today, my husband actually was cleaning our bathrooms. I had to pee and the floor was wet in my upstairs bathroom. My wonderful husband told me to go downstairs. I did and sat on the toilet seat which felt wet. He forgot he had sprayed it with Tilex. Chemical burns on your butt are great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 438

You deserved it 3 297

Treat yourself

By Terri - 08/11/2024 22:00 - Australia

Today, in order to have a nice relaxing bubble bath, I lit candles, played soothing music, and poured myself a glass of wine. Just as I was about to get in, I slipped on a patch of wet floor, dumped the wine on myself, and fell backward into the tub… that didn't have any water in it. Now I’m soaked in wine and bruised. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 126

By teflon_hammer - 25/05/2016 23:19 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, I was taking a shower, facing away from the faucet, when I dropped the soap. When I bent over to pick up the soap, my sister flushed a toilet in the next room, causing hot water to scorch my anus. I got made my shower's bitch, FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 921

You deserved it 1 205

Third degree

By Anonymous - 10/07/2021 06:01

Today, my wife left her curling iron on the bed, which was dangerous enough, but I also accidentally sat on it after my shower. Now I have a burn on the bottom of my balls, which has turned into a painful blister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 476

You deserved it 142

Chill

By FennFoxx - 21/03/2017 07:00 - United States - Cheraw

Today, I decided to take a relaxing bubble bath in my jacuzzi. I poured in the bubbles, turned on the jets, and got in. I realized too late that the jets had caused the bubbles to overflow and had made a huge mess in my bathroom. Relaxing, indeed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 136

You deserved it 1 902

By bcoper - 20/02/2010 14:03 - United States

Today, I was in pain due to overdoing it at the gym yesterday, so I thought a hot shower might help. Not only was there no hot water because of my sister's hour long showers, but I slipped getting out and hit my head. Now the pain is worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 394

You deserved it 3 273

Pleonasm 35

Tuesday 27 November 2012 18:49

Aw shit, that made me wince, that does sound ungodly. That was a close shave if you ask me, you almost turned two holes into one.

happle 21

Tuesday 27 November 2012 18:46

I really can't imagine two butt cracks... I hope you heal quickly. :)

Comments

merser 7

Wednesday 28 November 2012 2:35

did you have 2 go to the hospital to get stitches?

pinky78711 5

Wednesday 28 November 2012 3:00

You poor thing try and it must of hurt more since the soap in the water would sting you get well!

cloudygirl5 16

Wednesday 28 November 2012 3:27

Ouch! How was ur bath? :(

dragynfyre 4

Wednesday 28 November 2012 5:33

I'm so sorry for your pain, but must admit the dual butt crack comment made me crack up!

okieraider71 4

Wednesday 28 November 2012 5:34

I will kiss it and make it better.

momogal 22

Wednesday 28 November 2012 5:59

I'm going to hell for laughing at the pain of others, aren't I?

B5B0N35 18

Wednesday 28 November 2012 6:32

atleast you will shit faster

deathmountaindew 8

Wednesday 28 November 2012 8:10

Which hole is used now?

martinaaah 7

Wednesday 28 November 2012 8:35

I bet he really "tore you a new one" for mucking up his razor...

gotbitbyamonkey 3

Wednesday 28 November 2012 9:31

I shuddered when I read this. That sounds so painful.

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The Top

Today, I realized just how bitchy my BFF really is. When my sister said hi to her, she just glared back. She refers to a trans woman as "it" and not her correct pronouns. She just sucks the fun out of everything and makes me feel alone and stuck. I can't abandon her though because we're both each other's only friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 295

You deserved it 1 115

Today, my neighbour from across the road phoned me at work telling me there was a fire engine outside my house and a lot of smoke. I drove home in a panic, smashing a rear light on a post and getting flashed by a speed camera. It wasn't my house. The firemen were putting out a bonfire next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 856

You deserved it 6 630

The Top

Today, my soon-to-be-ex husband raised the bar. He sold our former marital home and put the money into a college fund for MY nieces. Now he looks great to my family, he already has a new place to live (thanks to his rich parents), and I’m stuck living with a college friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 679

You deserved it 207

Today, my coworker got angry at a mean customer. She came to the back where I work and started punching the wall repeatedly. When I tried to intervene and stop her from breaking her hand, she punched me in the stomach and uppercut me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 336

You deserved it 1 330

Today, my wife, who I haven’t seen for over a month because we both travel a lot for work, got home. The last thing she said to me was that she couldn't wait to get home because she just wants some alone time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 833

You deserved it 230

Today, I came home to find that my sweet kitten had gotten out and dragged a bird inside, where he ripped it to shreds. I found the bird's head in my underwear drawer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 779

You deserved it 506

Today, I was making a smoothie. I didn't plug in the blender until after all the ingredients were inside. I pushed the 'on' button. It was still on when I went to plug it in. With no lid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 417

You deserved it 33 335

Today, I finally confronted my parents about my depression and avoidant personality disorder. I showed them a well-kept journal of every time they've disregarded my feelings on something completely valid. I'd worked on this journal since I was ten years old. They denied it all and told me to "quit being a crybaby." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 114

You deserved it 243