Accident, Suspicious and Love: Jumping to conclusions

Jumping to conclusions

By el211 - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend ran accidentally head-first into my face and left me with a giant black eye. My mother is convinced I had a seizure in a park somewhere and won't listen when I tell her she's wrong, and everyone else thinks my boyfriend is abusive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 667

You deserved it 2 866

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Same thing different taste

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 22:50 - France

Today, my girlfriend gave herself a black eye by running into a door. To avoid being teased about her clumsiness, she's telling everyone that I hit her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 104

You deserved it 3 664

By DHarman - 25/05/2010 23:06 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend actually walked into a door and gave herself a black eye. She's too embarrassed to admit it, so she's telling everyone I beat her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 640

You deserved it 4 070

By Anonymous - 24/09/2011 04:40 - United States

Today, I received a serious concussion and several stitches to the back of my head. The attacker? My mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 574

You deserved it 2 947

By Username - 22/02/2010 05:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 105

You deserved it 3 325

That escalated quickly

By marrying this man - 10/10/2023 07:30

Today, I broke my boyfriend's nose trying to pop his blackheads. His leg jerked in shock, kicked my leg, and I fell, breaking the mirror, cutting myself, and slamming into the bathroom sink. I woke up in the hospital, with over a hundred stitches, and my poor boyfriend in jail for suspected domestic abuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 825

You deserved it 283

By dinosaur - 10/01/2011 10:35 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend decided it would be fun to sit on my lap. In the process he landed on me so hard that he made me hit my head. Then when he turned around his elbow smacked into my nose causing it to break. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 221

You deserved it 3 210

By Arielle - 31/01/2012 11:07 - Australia

Today, I went to the hospital emergency room to visit my boyfriend who had badly sliced his leg open. It ended with me being admitted with a possible head trauma, after hitting my head on the wall and floor as I collapsed at the sight of his wound. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 593

You deserved it 4 398

By sandysmith - 18/02/2012 15:49 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was at my house to hang out. When he was leaving I thought it would be cute to run and jump on him to say goodbye. He fell and hit his head. He is now in the hospital with a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 613

You deserved it 34 065

By *facefloor* - 24/07/2012 20:08 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 071

You deserved it 5 417

By Clumsy Clumsy - 16/04/2016 16:27 - Canada - Spruce Grove

Today, I ran up to my boyfriend to kiss him when he got home from work. I tripped and I fell on him, and he fell backwards. He ended up hitting his head on the sidewalk and had to get stitches. He also had a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 494

You deserved it 3 248

jailbot 7

Monday 15 March 2010 16:09

....what? Your mom's assumption is really...random.

Guerilla8 0

Monday 15 March 2010 16:08

"accidentally"

Comments

KurouTenshi 0

Monday 15 March 2010 16:43

yeah, everyone thought I was abusive to my ex because of the bruises on her arms that she got from her job in the kitchen. what they don't know is, if they saw her vag, and how beat up THAT was, then they might accuse me if being abusive... ...in bed.

Devolver 0

Monday 15 March 2010 16:59

^^Yea that's why girls never should date a ninja.

KurouTenshi 0

Monday 15 March 2010 17:06

yeah the great thing is, you'll think I'm making a sammich joke, but she really works in the kitchen of a retirement home LOL

TryToBeKind 0

Monday 15 March 2010 17:57

lol, you sound like my boyfriend - with the tearing up of the vag, pounding the pussy, having a snatch snack ... if I worked in a kitchen instead of a factory I would totally think you were him, lol

KurouTenshi 0

Monday 15 March 2010 19:14

no%2C+I%27m+not.+my+various+horrible+experiences+with+women+have+lead+me+to+a+gay+lifestyle%2C+and+my+boyfriend+appreciates+my+decision+too.+

cdunning 0

Monday 15 March 2010 19:36

What lol

KurouTenshi 0

Monday 15 March 2010 19:45

mobile app is being fail

Sirin_fml 46

Monday 15 March 2010 19:48

It's fixed now for all new comments.

KurouTenshi 0

Monday 15 March 2010 19:54

well, in short: I can't be the girls bf, cause I'm a homosexual. just saying.

Monikabug 9

Monday 15 March 2010 20:02

@15, that comment made my vag hurt. Haha ツ

MelissaMae 0

Monday 4 April 2011 8:50

your douche and probably horrible in bed... just sayin

Xerofight 0

Monday 15 March 2010 17:12

Well you've already got one black eye, make sure he doesn't have to tell you again otherwise you'll earn another. *kapow* right to the noggin.

The_good_times 0

Monday 15 March 2010 17:19

So he pulled a Zinedin Zidan on you.

Pirate_Faerie 5

Monday 15 March 2010 17:24

I understand where your coming from op, last two year ago, I tried to just on my husbands back, he fell forward and I hit my face on the concrete driveway...ended up with a bruised nose and a huge scrape one my forehead, and everyone asked if someone beat me, and wouldn't believe that I'm just a klutz, lol

Pirate_Faerie 5

Monday 15 March 2010 17:26

two years ago, now last two years...stupid phone word substitution...

420smoke420 3

Monday 15 March 2010 17:26

oh I get it he "accidentally" gave you a black eye and he's "not" abusive ooookkkaaayyy I believe you

TryToBeKind 0

Monday 15 March 2010 17:52

I can see where people are coming from in thinking your boyfriend is abusive since you said he did it (which he did, just by accident). Sounds like he felt bad (even if he thought it was sort of funny), and that he isn't abusive. I had someone open a locker in my face (the corner caught me when I stood up and they opened the door hard from arms-length away), so I know those things happen. All that said, I can't see where your mom came up with you having a seizure in a park. If you have seizures, that makes sense, but where did the park come from? Is she trying to say that you shouldn't go anywhere alone because of this? I guess I Just don't get that part. Kinda feel bad for your boyfriend, too, since everyone thinks he beats you. Guess the upshot is they care about you and are in the "can't be too careful/abused people make up excuses" camp.

The_good_times 0

Monday 15 March 2010 17:53

Why would she post the fact that he's not on FML, if he really is abusive then she'd probably try to change the minds of the people that actually know her, not ours.

TryToBeKind 0

Monday 15 March 2010 18:00

they could have been playing touch-football or maybe he was running at her, meaning to "tackle" her or hug her or pick her up or something. Actually, running at someone to pick them up off the couch randomly makes a lot of sense. It could happen, bad luck on both their parts.