Work: Meritocracy

Meritocracy

By blue - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was put on notice at work due to my "anger problem." Apparently, sighing in a meeting means you'll be labeled as someone with a short temper. However, the creepy stalker guy is on the fast track to management. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 953

You deserved it 3 219

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Early warning

By Hreyes - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I overheard my boss stressing out over finding a replacement for me. I didn't know I was leaving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 018

You deserved it 2 228

Paranoid

By MaddyN - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Forest Grove

Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 042

You deserved it 3 537

Team building

By Incompetent - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Pakistan - Lahore

Today, my boss admitted that he seriously regrets hiring me, but can't really do anything about it because that would make the senior management question his judgment, making him look bad. So he's just 'putting up' with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 214

You deserved it 1 398

So that's a no, right?

By SadMan - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went to ask my boss for a raise. Turns out they are firing 35 people. I wasn't on the list until I asked for a raise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 871

You deserved it 7 467

Stoner in disguise

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Rowlett

Today, I found out that mishearing my boss and laughing at what I thought he said can make him think I'm high and nearly force me to submit to a drug test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 432

You deserved it 2 930

Dogsbody

By tee - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Kansas City

Today, I was told it was inconvenient for me to take lunch breaks, because someone else has to answer the phones and no one else wants to actually do any work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 891

You deserved it 2 027

Welcome back

By pixie_pix13 - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, I came back to work after being out for a week. As I walked to the back of the store, I threw my hands up and yelled, "I'm back bitches". Right after I said it, I noticed my boss was behind me. I was then taken to the office and wrote up for foul language on my first day back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 067

You deserved it 3 430

Panic in the streets

By Insane Guy - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, at work, I jumped under my desk in fear of a nuclear missile attack when the firestation next us let out its new awareness siren. I think I'm going insane. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 625

You deserved it 8 064

Bad hair day

By Tony - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff

Today, I was fired for having a haircut that was 'inappropriate for the workplace'. I have alopecia. My boss told me to stop making up excuses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 329

You deserved it 2 642

Piss off

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Sandown

Today, my boss sent me a message about a project, via WhatsApp. It's my day off, so I figured it could wait till I was able to give a flying fuck. Literally a minute later, he was spamming me, demanding to know why I'd left him as read and reminding me that he has firing powers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 334

You deserved it 1 618

ThreeSheetsGone 12

Thursday 8 September 2011 15:59

*sigh*

Fruit_Dealer 9

Thursday 8 September 2011 16:02

Double posts annoy me.. Good thing you can at least edit them.

Comments

leadman1989 15

Thursday 8 September 2011 20:31

Well if you get fired they'll give your picture to rupert to make sure your angry ass doesn't shoot up the place.

dopefreshh19 3

Thursday 8 September 2011 20:57

Lol why would you sing in a meeting in the first place ?

zebraface 15

Thursday 8 September 2011 23:35

Must have been a pretty ferocious sigh.

getupstandup_fml 2

Thursday 8 September 2011 23:42

I diagnose OP with envy.

Kristoffer 35

Thursday 8 September 2011 23:43

Shoulda been part of that old Phil Collins song.

sparxva 12

Friday 9 September 2011 0:32

OP sounds bitter... Maybe a little angry... In comparison, creepy stalker guy has learned to conceal his feelings and not be as obvious. Think Poker-Face.

charlotte100 2

Friday 9 September 2011 3:13

Well, this is purely based on Ur own subjective opinion. Im sure Ur boss didnt put u on notice solely because of u sighing/anger problem. Maybe the creeper stalker is actually a better worker than you are.

Camhero 0

Friday 9 September 2011 3:47

If you can't beat them, join them.

Lamy_fml 5

Friday 9 September 2011 5:11

God I want to so try this too now

Punkpoptart1119 20

Friday 9 September 2011 5:58

That's how it works..definitely FYL. I know how it is in that boat. I can't stand seeing people who don't deserve promotions out there getting them like its nothing. Maybe the stalker guy is a giant suck up who is so far up the managers bum he can't even see straight. I'm gonna stop before I go into a fit of rage..

ReynshineCutting 10

Friday 9 September 2011 14:49

Go on. Rage. Maybe the creepy stalker is. better worker. Maybe he does suck up more. Either way, he's doing what's necessary to get a promotion. You can't fault someone for that. Maybe if OP tried harder and sucked up more s/he'd get one too.