Mum

By mummer11 - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Ireland

Today, my mum staggered home, piss drunk. When I tried to walk her to her room, she shoved me away and cursed at me for being a "goody two-shoes". She then slurred, "I fucked your mum", and informed me that my mum is a skank. That's good to know, mum. FML
I agree, your life sucks 46 414
You deserved it 3 199
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Top comments

ElricMustang 23

Your mom really has some issues with your mom, huh?

380 3
DocBastard 38

Mother: You're a goody two shoes! OP: Yes, mum. Mother: Your mum's a *****. OP: Right you are, mum.

307 10

Comments

ElricMustang 23

Your mom really has some issues with your mom, huh?

380 3
NoShit_Sherly 11

His mom's a bitch. Hey, you may not agree.. But his mom will

32 1
DocBastard 38

Mother: You're a goody two shoes! OP: Yes, mum. Mother: Your mum's a *****. OP: Right you are, mum.

307 10
L2U7A_E5I9A2E8H 20

Admitting you have problem is the first step to recovery ;)

36 2
lovethenumber13 14

"Chicken Soup for the Mum's Soul" written by O.P. Mummer

6 0
awkwardloveannie 28

correcting your grammer didn't make your comment any better

9 30
beautifulbeats26 6

If I didn't correct it it would have bugged me until I did. Just down vote me like the rest, no need to get sensitive.

19 4
DocBastard 38

When someone misspells "grammar" while trying to correct someone else's grammar, it makes me all happy and tingly inside like I've just eaten a warm chocolate cake.

62 3
gotaplanstan 28

I like it when people say "your an idiot" too.

21 1
Welshite 39

I would make an inappropriate masturbation joke, but there are so many to choose from.

22 52
JaegerMayCry 13

if they're inappropriate why would you say any to begin with?

2 31
13ky13 20

If they're inappropriate, why WOULDN'T you say them?

74 0
ninjuh_wingman 29

Damn. Your mom really hates your mom.

89 1
scottyspot 11

Now you know she is a lesbian too! Awesome!

10 34
amDes 11

or she violates herself on the regular and dirty talks to herself

23 2
HeadlessSparrow 20

Well the truth comes out when you're drunk!

31 2
iknowiwantyou 13

drunk words are sober thoughts. Or maybe she just likes to speak nonsense when she's drunk.

32 3