Work: Nice try

Nice try

By bigmouth - 02/08/2009 07:35 - United States

Today, I was working as a host at a pasta diner. The hostess I was working with was very attractive and we were flirting quite a bit. A large woman walked in to be seated, and I leaned over to her and dared her to ask the woman if she wanted two chairs. She leaned back and said, "That's my mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 813

You deserved it 76 276

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

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Same thing different taste

Better Call Small

By not-so-young-shortie - 18/02/2009 22:57 - United States

Today, I was eating at a restaurant with my boyfriend. He's 6'2 and I'm 4'11. Out of nowhere, the hostess started openly flirting with him, and asked him if he needed a booster chair for his daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 920

You deserved it 5 098

Creeped out

By bezoar10 - 04/04/2009 19:36 - United States

Today, my mother and I went to lunch and there is a really cute waiter that works at the diner. I requested him to wait on us like I sometimes do. While we were waiting to be seated, I heard one waiter say to the cute one, "Ya, the creepy one is back, and this time she brought her mom!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 923

You deserved it 70 687

By Anonymous - 03/06/2019 12:07

Today, while working as a waitress, an attractive woman sat at one of my tables. When she paid, I decided to be bold and write my number and "Call me" on her receipt. She put in a complaint to my manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 819

You deserved it 3 566

By sonofmilf - 17/05/2009 05:46 - United States

Today, I was working at a grocery store when a couple of my co-workers called a code pink in aisle 22, which means there was an attractive woman in that aisle. After hearing about how hot she was, I went over to see her for myself. It was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 953

You deserved it 6 409

By hadrienne's pall - 13/05/2016 19:25 - Canada - Markham

Today, I asked a girl at the restaurant I work at if she'd had enough to eat. When she said yes, I said, "Are you sure?" I didn't realize how insulting it sounded until her equally overweight mom was up in my face, demanding to see my manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 977

You deserved it 4 283

And I oop

By SuperBunny - 20/04/2009 07:59 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was taking me to dinner to meet his parents. As we pulled into the restaurant valet, I saw a woman in a slutty dress and hooker heels get out of the car ahead of us. I jokingly asked if we had accidentally pulled into a strip club, pointing at the woman. It was his mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 855

You deserved it 62 047

By TheMike23 - 11/01/2016 05:28 - United States - Winter Garden

Today, I went out with my mom to a restaurant. We were sitting down to eat, and a waitress walks over to our table and asks, "How are you ladies doing tonight?" It really was a nice thing to ask, for my mom. As for me, being a man, not so much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 908

You deserved it 2 294

What are the odds?

By pchis4ever - 20/11/2009 18:30 - United States

Today, I was eating at KFC when my roommate unexpectedly showed up. He asked me who I was there with, and I told him I was on a sexy date with his mom. Just then a woman 5 feet away turned around and gave me a disgusted look. Guess whose mom was in town visiting for the weekend? FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 627

You deserved it 37 130

By grannysmack - 11/07/2009 09:10 - United States

Today, as I was bent over at my waitressing job an elderly woman walked by and smacked my ass. I looked at her, shocked, and she said, "It was too tempting with you bent over like that, I have a dirty old mind." I didn't know whether to be flattered or horrified. Maybe both. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 878

You deserved it 6 559

Pleased to meet you

By footinmouth - 13/09/2009 05:14 - United States

Today, I went to a restaurant with some friends. I noticed a very cute waitress about my age, so I walked over to her and asked if she had a boyfriend. The extremely fit, attractive waiter standing next to her immediately turned, held out his hand and goes, "Yeah. Meet me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 008

You deserved it 14 100

BigBen7 0

Sunday 2 August 2009 16:04

She shoulda kicked you in the balls lol

Qup 0

Sunday 2 August 2009 17:12

live and learn, eh? hopefully you will start seeing people for who they are and not for what they look like. you're pathetic.

Comments

Missy5683 0

Friday 29 July 2011 5:17

your an ass for saying that... you should have been fired

xAvaricex 1

Monday 23 January 2012 10:12

why are a lot of people calling the guy an ass he was making a joke and a funny one at that if it offended anyone then they just need to get over it. i mean come on if its funny its funny no matter if its insulting or not

fuzzybear14 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 1:28

after she sed that u shud have sed : so u can sit with her...

fml_mu 10

Thursday 23 February 2012 13:55

You deserve it for laughing at some1. Maybe one day it will be your turn or some1of ur own... Then u see how it feels...

scifichic92 8

Sunday 8 July 2012 4:28

So rude.

marramrammar 2

Friday 24 August 2012 21:00

She maybe joking!

TheCatSniffer 18

Sunday 31 March 2013 8:35

Coming from someone who has a big mom I would have cut your penis off and shoved it down your throat

D3ATHZ3RO 15

Friday 3 May 2013 6:45

Ass hat

cwl727 32

Tuesday 25 March 2014 23:26

Idiot.

hayleymarmar 1

Thursday 15 May 2014 13:05

that would've been easy to save. You should've said something like, "I know it's your mom. that's why I wanted to give her two chairs; so you could sit with her."