Pregnancy, Gross, Neighbours, Noise and Health: No thanks - FML

No thanks

By Kara - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my downstairs neighbor had a home birth. Not only did I hear eighteen hours of uninterrupted screaming, they called me afterwards to ask if I could come over to help them clean up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 039

You deserved it 2 868

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Top comments

txgirl2013 14

Friday 16 December 2011 1:07

Like a good neighbor OP is there :) ha

LiL_Dub 2

Friday 16 December 2011 1:10

Gross! No way, they need to clean up their own bodily fluids!

Comments

stonedfishies 10

Thursday 28 June 2012 13:16

What a neighbor you have there..

catherinek 9

Thursday 28 March 2013 8:28

That's disgusting!!! They need to clean up their own mess or maybe have the baby in a hospital or birthing center like normal people so that they can take care of the mess

nicholasj96 9

Sunday 25 August 2013 12:59

Lol I would've said no , "hell no !" If I was annoyed .

nicholasj96 9

Sunday 25 August 2013 13:01

They don't have no next door neighbors ? Shit .

maddyylion 16

Wednesday 25 June 2014 22:10

I hope you said no

fantasyworld 37

Thursday 12 March 2015 19:38

Tell that It's their baby they should clean.

HotMamaBBM 11

Friday 27 May 2016 8:06

Like hell no. Wth!!!

randybryant799 20

Sunday 10 October 2021 3:10

They called you to clean up? That seems extremely odd unless you're super good friends with them.

vchan 20

Friday 3 March 2023 14:17

Hum…… biohazard fluids….. how about no?

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I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 9

Today, my brother showed my wife a Craigslist ad by someone seeking casual sex. It had very specific details that made it seem like I wrote it. My brother later admitted in private that he made the post as revenge for me not loaning him $500 last month. Meanwhile, my wife still thinks I'm unfaithful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 646

You deserved it 1 159

The Top

Today, working at a fast food restaurant, I saw a woman in her late thirties pull out some hair and put it in her food, then threaten to sue me and the restaurant. She also told me no one would believe me, a teenager, when I told her I saw her put it there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 759

You deserved it 1 460

Today, I discovered that when business is slow at my family-owned store, my daughter and another employee make a habit of sneaking away to the back room. I have literally been paying this kid to screw around with my daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 459

You deserved it 5 206

Today, I had a nightmare in which I murdered a store employee because the store wasn’t selling the item I wanted. I would never do that in real life, and now I feel extremely guilty for how I acted in my dream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 767

You deserved it 193

Today, my son is such an idiot that he forgot he invited both his girlfriends to my brother's funeral. They started a punch-up over him and everyone ended up joining in since we're a very argumentative family. People got arrested and in the end both girls agreed to share my son, who was unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 065

You deserved it 270

Today, it was my turn to take out the trash. While walking to the dumpster, I slip and fall. It doesn't really hurt, so I get up and go to the dumpster, but the top is frozen stuck. It won't budge. Then I really pull with a lot of force, and the lid swings open and busts my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 342

You deserved it 4 151

Today, I called the Suicide hotline. I dialled the number wrong and woke some poor old lady. She thought I was her son and kept asking me, "How come you don't visit anymore?" I told her I couldn't visit because of the Covid pandemic. I lied to an elderly woman I've never met. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 192

You deserved it 202