No thanks

By Kara - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my downstairs neighbor had a home birth. Not only did I hear eighteen hours of uninterrupted screaming, they called me afterwards to ask if I could come over to help them clean up. FML
I agree, your life sucks 42 039
You deserved it 2 869
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Top comments

txgirl2013 14

Like a good neighbor OP is there :) ha

363 5
LiL_Dub 2

Gross! No way, they need to clean up their own bodily fluids!

189 1

Comments

txgirl2013 14

Like a good neighbor OP is there :) ha

363 5
WCARlover 34

15 minutes could save you 15 perc--oh, never mind

70 8
upyourzlolz 11

Hopefully the baby will be in "good hands"

75 4
Dmars444 4

downstairs neighbors are lucky to have a vampire upstairs :D

4 58
dethbunny 0

I'm sorry, I don't speak stupid.

26 3
tommyfox 19

Ohhhhh... OP must be the girl from 4E!

18 3
cdogLuvs2golf 0

#36 that does not make any sense and was really weird

14 1
StoryOfTheYear 14

I think they need more help than just a cleaning. I know times might be bad, but save yourselves and OP the displeasure and go to a hospital next time.

8 0
Babyseal420 7

With a mop and bucket.

5 0
SayPeanuts 29

At least you didn't have to push a baby out of your vajayjay...

148 20
shift_love 13

Clean up that gumbo pot.

5 21
awagh666 14

At least you didn't have to hear "oh my god, i'm coming, i'm coming, i'm coming...."

14 1
YakuzaxGeneralz 9

I'm guessing OP heard that around 9 months ago.

29 0
awagh666 14

Imagine op hearing the baby screaming that....

3 8
gregorrok1 0

Well OP get use to the screaming. New borns are infamous for their constant crying...

13 4
graham11 14

Are those extra A's really necessary?

9 7
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10

I think the extra 'A's accentuate the awesomeness of afterbirth.

19 2
CommonSenseKarma 17

Ah, alliteration is astounding.

10 0
Msagrera 5

I used to think that was funny, but then i took an arrow to the knee

0 0
KellyIsTheBest32 12

I think 6 was using sarcasm.

14 2
Jaxx66 21

It is gross. Lol. As much as people say child birth is beautiful, it is.... But watching the baby come out is absolutely nasty. I wish I didn't agree to be with my friend during hers. The screams and everything aren't bad. Right when the baby is about to crown it has some weird gooey bubble come out with it. I was told that was part of the fluid... *shudders* it was like alien.

9 2
cinderella10383 6

Her water bag was still intact so the baby was born in a bubble which means the baby is a bubble baby and that only happens in like 1 out of every 2,000 or more births. When I had my kids no bubble popped out before them lol j

2 0
HoboSmeller 6

was it a boy or a girl?

42 9
btnhdude 0

You ask the question but ill bet you know you wont get an answer.

7 2
KiddNYC1O 20

You never know. OPs do comment my friend.

9 2
MagicallyFat 12

They do comment, although I've only seen it once you never know

10 1
Ins0mau 20

Does it really matter to you?

2 2
Anubyte 0

Make sure not to wear anything white, blood can stain!

18 4
crazyrunnergirl 7

I would hope you said no

58 3
M0rt 0

Crazyrunnergirl get back to the kitchen

1 1
MagicGiraffe 12

OP's too busy cooking in the kitchen... ;)

1 1
aantho_fml 0

Be polite and bring a gift.

22 6
yumlicious 4

Then GTFO (and not clean)...

9 1