Noise, Babies and Kids: Noise annoys - FML

Noise annoys

By cocacoola - 11/07/2011 14:24 - Iceland

Today, the couple downstairs decided they wanted to try a home birth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 781

You deserved it 4 318

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Green anecdotes of jealousy, full of shamrocks and pints, for a memorable St. Patrick's Day! More…

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Same thing different taste

911 what's your emergency?

By midwify - 05/01/2015 17:58 - Denmark - Asaa

Today, I gave birth to our first child at home. What was supposed to be a beautiful moment of us peacefully greeting our newborn, ended up with the cops knocking on our door. Apparently me giving birth sounds like a domestic dispute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 313

You deserved it 7 689

Hell no!

By Anonymous - 14/03/2024 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife opted for a home birth with a nurse and her mother. Her mother is such a baby-feral, men-are-bastards, hippie feminist dragon that not only did she yell at me when I tried to be in the room, she has now pushed me out of the house. I ended up sat in my car with only one shoe and no phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 662

You deserved it 210

Boom boom

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, the family upstairs decided to play basketball. Indoors. At 3am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 327

You deserved it 3 184

By katiebug - 12/07/2016 02:27 - United States - Topeka

Today, I was trying to get a good night's sleep before the huge exam tomorrow, which I'm extremely anxious about. The SAME night my neighbor below me is having a home birth. It lasted NINE HOURS. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 271

You deserved it 1 113

By ineedsleep - 30/10/2014 14:15 - Finland - J?rvenp

Today, I found out that there's a very loud and frisky couple living above my bedroom, and a family with a crying baby living above my living room. At this rate, I'll end up sleeping in the bathtub in my own home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 705

You deserved it 2 753

By Anonymous - 14/02/2015 02:43 - United States - Titusville

Today, I gave birth to a baby girl. Where was my husband after the agony finally ended? Standing just outside the room, flirting with a nurse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 295

You deserved it 3 537

Make it stop

By Anonymous - 10/01/2016 13:17 - United States - Waldorf

Today, I met my new upstairs neighbors. They have a four-month-old child and appear to be firm believers in the "let them cry it out" philosophy. The baby's room is right above mine. A few days of trying to sleep through this shit and I'll look like a Walking Dead extra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 557

You deserved it 1 578

Family portrait

By Anonymous - 29/05/2022 14:00

Today, I gave birth, but my husband was late and got here just in time to cut the cord. He was hung over after celebrating his impending fatherhood all night. He missed the cord twice, cut it, then fell over, and wound up in the bed next to mine, with a hydrating IV and a bashed head where he hit it on the baby's cot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 135

You deserved it 193

Crowded

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - South Salem

Today, my sister came to stay with me in my apartment for the last few weeks of her difficult pregnancy. However she didn't tell me she was bringing her two dogs, her jackass of a husband, my bratty nephew, and an inflatable kiddie pool so she could have a natural water birth in my living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 474

You deserved it 5 985

Oh no…

By pacelily - 30/08/2016 20:32 - United States - San Marcos

Today, I met my new upstairs neighbors and their 4 kids all under the age of 6. I met them due to all the thudding coming from upstairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 920

You deserved it 894

Next

Top comments

livgasms 4

Monday 11 July 2011 19:09

wait til you smell them cooking the placenta

amrik 11

Monday 11 July 2011 19:10

or she may just be really loud and he's really good

Comments

sexywhiteguy 0

Wednesday 13 July 2011 3:37

that sucks

Imgonnahaveabf 9

Wednesday 13 July 2011 4:12

What morons. They're probably the kind of idiots who don't believe in doctors.

oyasuminasaix 2

Wednesday 13 July 2011 4:19

it's only one day, your life does not suck.

Foxes15 1

Wednesday 13 July 2011 4:43

sounds like a party

kristiney28 0

Wednesday 13 July 2011 5:23

ew kmv thats gross and tht suks 4 u );

zebragirl2 0

Wednesday 13 July 2011 5:26

that really sucks hahaha bet u slept great

nvo 6

Wednesday 13 July 2011 7:01

it's called life. Get over it, because newborns waking/crying several times a night can be way more annoying than this one-time event. if you're cool with both, they might cut you some slack in return.

saggypeanuts 0

Wednesday 13 July 2011 11:56

yer I do that all the time

ikillkkk 0

Wednesday 13 July 2011 12:28

NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO

Semperfisweetie 1

Wednesday 13 July 2011 21:10

And..? Grow up. Good for them! That's the best thing to do for your baby!

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The Top

Today, I learned that my new boyfriend seriously thinks that Inglorious Bastards is historically accurate and is actually the secret history of World War 2 being revealed to the public. Nothing I say will make him change his mind. I guess that relationship is a goner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 113

You deserved it 378

Today, after 3 months of no orgasms, I was in the shower, working to rectify that. As I was seconds away from coming, my dad loudly knocked on the door and demanded to know how much longer I was going to take. Probably another 3 months now, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 824

You deserved it 9 496

The Top

Today, one of my classmates put hand sanitizer on my seat. I took one look at my seat and said, “You honestly believe I’m going to fall for that?” I then got laughed at anyway, because I’m disliked enough for them to do that. That’s right, I get bullied for being bullied. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 016

You deserved it 131

Today, I was sent to a customer's house to switch out a washing machine. My boss had assured me that everything I'd need was already in the truck. Halfway there, I ran out of gas and I realized I didn't have the gas card. My boss says it's my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 748

You deserved it 7 538

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years saw baby wipes in my bathroom and assumed I had a kid. He broke up with me. I use baby wipes to take off my makeup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 992

You deserved it 3 605

Today, my dad asked my step-mom if he could get some booty before bed because he still had energy. He didn't realize I was still in the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 698

You deserved it 944

Today, I sprayed hair spray under my arms instead of anti-perspirant. I didn't realize it until I went to put my shirt on and couldn't raise my arms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 089

You deserved it 10 964

Today, a cute guy approached me at a nightclub. I was really excited, until he drunkenly slurred, "Babe, I'd suck the farts from your asshole!" and then threw up everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 800

You deserved it 2 359