Sex, Weird and Intimacy: Non sequitur - FML

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Non sequitur

By lisacasabonita - 12/11/2010 16:31 - United States

Spicy

Today, while at dinner, I told my boyfriend that I wished he liked sushi. He replied, "I wish you liked anal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 223

You deserved it 42 505

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 19/04/2010 20:36 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. He followed it with, "Want to try anal?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 680

You deserved it 9 738

By not impressed - 09/10/2015 18:27 - Canada - Nanaimo

Spicy

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 334

You deserved it 4 609

You what?

By charliesangel123 - 21/02/2010 17:16 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I was waiting downstairs at my boyfriend's house as he got ready to go. His mom came over and said she was so glad her son had met me, that I made him really happy. I smiled thinking how nice that was of her to say. She then continued, "Still, he tells me anal is a no?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 524

You deserved it 3 724

What what?

By Anonymous - 12/04/2022 16:00

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend stuck his finger in my butt and I liked it, but I can’t ever tell him that or he’ll get that smug look on his face like, “I told you so, let’s have anal now.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 506

You deserved it 1 468

By Anonymous - 29/12/2010 11:25 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the very first time in three years. Apparently, all it took was anal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 686

You deserved it 13 296

Is it true?

By analgirl - 09/11/2014 13:31 - France - Paris

Spicy

Today, I found out the only reason my boyfriend asked me out is because he thought I "looked like a girl who'd be into anal". FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 149

You deserved it 4 413

By Picaresque - 26/02/2009 17:57 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 285 967

You deserved it 68 209

The best method!

By Anonymous - 04/01/2020 18:00

Spicy

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 987

You deserved it 955

Nice try, chief

By Anonymous - 04/04/2011 01:46 - United States

Spicy

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 985

You deserved it 15 191

By KaiyaOtaku1 - 14/07/2014 23:48 - United States - Seattle

Today, while eating dinner with my boyfriend, I look up to see him staring at me, smiling. Hoping he wanted to say how lucky of a man he was who loved me deeply, I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "You can't smell that yet? It was a noxious one." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 877

You deserved it 6 660

Next

Top comments

mike3775 35

Friday 12 November 2010 19:02

Nice to see you have a good relationship and can talk things out in a civilized manner Seriously though, this was hilarious on his part I'm sure he was joking like I do with my wife when she nitpicks me

Mpsteve13 7

Friday 12 November 2010 19:01

boyfriend ftw

Comments

x5xfmlx5x 0

Friday 12 November 2010 21:34

b a sport put it in ur butt

my2centsworth 15

Friday 12 November 2010 21:38

At least you have an honest relationship.

Rizzyk83 0

Friday 12 November 2010 21:38

lol.. best one yet

itsybitsyspider 0

Friday 12 November 2010 21:43

boyfriend win!

emjay09 0

Friday 12 November 2010 21:49

gross to both.

nayeli760 0

Saturday 13 November 2010 7:42

Agree. Both are nasty. Although, it was a funny joke:)

NotSoMadMike 0

Friday 12 November 2010 21:58

Well, at least you both have an honest relationship.

TheTrollrCoaster 2

Friday 12 November 2010 22:13

You dun it. You don't like anal.

AnaDarkAngel 0

Friday 12 November 2010 22:17

FY boyfriend. anal sex=gay sex. guys are GAY for wanting/liking anal sex....God created a ****** on girls for a reason so if a guy wants anal dump his ass and tell him to go F a guy who will actually enjoy it hahaha! no offense to gay guys, i respect your beliefs :)

felton 0

Friday 12 November 2010 22:18

Thesunsetglow LMFAO

Jmedic 0

Friday 12 November 2010 22:20

Baha

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The Top

Today, my husband told me he wants a $600 birthday gift. He doesn't understand why I said that wasn't happening, and is now mad at me. Not only can we not afford that, he only spent less than $10 on my birthday gift last month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 461

You deserved it 129

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. As I was about to give him head, I saw he had so much left over toilet paper stuck to his nuts. It kind of turned me off but I didn't want to say anything because he's one of the sweetest guys ever. After he nutted, he got up and there was toilet paper crumbs on his bed and ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 225

The Top

Today, my mom told me she wouldn't be able to leave my middle-aged brother at home for Christmas in order to meet her first grandchild. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 400

You deserved it 886

Today, I bought a fancy automatic ball launcher for my dog. When I demonstrated it, my dog watched the ball fly through the air, then charged at the launcher instead, thinking it was the toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 328

You deserved it 121

Today, despite having a stomach bug, I went into work, as my boss is overseas and had warned me not to take any sick leave until she returned. After 4 hours and vomiting twice, I left. She found out and sent me an email bitching me out for coming in sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 382

You deserved it 2 934

Today, I ran into my manipulative ex-boyfriend at a party. We were chatting and I mentioned that the guys I have been seeing lately all turn out to be jerks. He said, "Yeah well, you dumped me and don't deserve to be happy." Apparently he has been creeping and scaring off any guys interested in me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 962

You deserved it 4 151

Today, I was walking down the street when someone pushed me into poison ivy. He ran off saying, "That's for beating me in the race." I've never been in a race, nor have I ever met him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 659

You deserved it 3 523

Today, my mom got mad at me. She told me that the neighbor was stupid for letting their kids play all over the street alone. I said it was fine, because the mom walked right next to the daughter as she played on her scooter. She argued, “Why do you always have to disagree with me?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 691

You deserved it 129