Intimacy, Sex, Underwear and Love: Not really the desired effect

Not really the desired effect

By Ouchithurt - 04/08/2009 07:55 - United States

Today, I was following my girlfriend up the stairs, I was pretty sure I was going to get lucky. As I was almost up the set of stairs, she lifted her skirt and revealed to me that she wasn't wearing any panties. I fell backwards down the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 019

You deserved it 21 065

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 01/03/2011 16:21 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 046

You deserved it 45 872

Protip

By Herman - 13/02/2023 06:00 - United States - Bedford

Today, I went to my room to find my girlfriend on the floor, butt up, with her pants down. I elatedly took the invitation and dropped my pants too, only for her to tell me, "Not so fast champ, I'm trying to force some farts out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 092

You deserved it 471

By Gordon - 22/07/2009 14:12 - United States

Today, I was standing by the bed naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opens the door and walks over to me, swinging her hips, wearing pratically nothing. About four feet from me, she trips on the edge of the floor mat, and uses my 'junk' to catch herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 701

You deserved it 6 765

Cockstepblocked

By Anonymous - 19/09/2019 18:00

Today, while rushing upstairs to have sex, I tripped on the stairs and rammed my naked boner into the edge of the step. All my wife could do is laugh at me. Now it even hurts to pee or put my trousers on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 133

You deserved it 470

By grabber - 09/08/2009 23:43 - United States

Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 356

You deserved it 11 009

By Anonymous - 25/08/2015 07:32 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was undressing for my girlfriend. I thought I was being all smooth and sexy, until I went to sit on the side of the bed and beckon her over. Instead, I sat heavily on my balls, screamed, then fell off the bed sobbing like a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 360

You deserved it 7 146

By cheated - 08/07/2009 06:46 - United States

Today, I had sex with my fiancée. My panties fell behind the bed. Later, when I went to get them, I found three other pairs. Only one pair was mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 994

You deserved it 4 551

By Anonymous - 30/04/2013 18:24 - United States - Pompton Plains

Today, I got home from work and found my girlfriend waiting for me in some skimpy lingerie. She ended up pushing me onto the bed, and as I lay there, expecting to be pleasured, she pulled out a pair of adult-sized footsie pajamas and dressed me in them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 967

You deserved it 8 441

Why would you do that?

By HughGorgy - 20/03/2009 05:37 - Canada

Today, after sex with my girlfriend, I thought it would be sexy to wear her underwear until we saw each other again. I found a pair in her bathroom, but they definitely weren't her sexy ones. Her mom walked in on me to collect the laundry and screeched, "What are you doing with my panties!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 386

You deserved it 103 231

By shit.... - 08/11/2012 18:25 - Malaysia - Kuala Selangor

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 636

You deserved it 31 360

jessxoxo28 5

Tuesday 4 August 2009 16:08

omg, wow., lol!!!! u must have been blown away with wat u saw

Caael 0

Tuesday 4 August 2009 16:13

Hope you got sympathy sex

Comments

ily_hun996 0

Tuesday 4 August 2009 16:02

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

itsohsoabsurd 6

Tuesday 4 August 2009 16:14

why don't you just write a proper comment instead of that first-crap? you'll still be first!

GrandeCarne 0

Tuesday 4 August 2009 16:15

I feel like im in a graveyard or something... everyone is buried

Antivirus_fml 0

Tuesday 4 August 2009 16:43

Welcome to the f*ckyard!

Kiwi_Splash 0

Wednesday 5 August 2009 18:00

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

RoryStorm239 0

Sunday 28 March 2010 21:31

HEEEEY YA! *ftw*

Trevv 0

Wednesday 7 April 2010 1:53

I'd do the same thing if my girlfriend did that to me. Course, she's the type to not even notice....

greatsarcazm 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 6:18

did it smell that bad?

Jojo08_fml 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 1:08

Ooooo #1 your cool?

Mordakai420 6

Wednesday 12 September 2012 16:36

Oh, you're first? Please tell me how your comment is better than everyone else's.

dearViena 0

Tuesday 4 August 2009 16:03

big deal?

i_wuz_nver_here 31

Sunday 3 October 2010 22:15

yeah cuz cracked open skulls are part of everyone's daily routine.

ily_hun996 0

Tuesday 4 August 2009 16:06

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

deathbunny256 0

Tuesday 4 August 2009 17:37

I don't get why people bury anyone who's first, even if they don't say first!!! Sorry on behalf of all the others, this hppened to me before. I for one understand how exciing it is to be first. :)

DeadMansCrack 4

Tuesday 4 August 2009 21:29

So do I, except the FML where I was first was deleted. Life's unfair.

laleyla 0

Wednesday 5 August 2009 0:48

I am really wondering how boring your life must be when being first is something that excites you that much... I mean, I already feel lame for wasting my time on fml. get a life!!!