Miscellaneous: Nuts

Nuts

By dieders - 21/11/2016 06:34 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up and opened my curtains to see my gardener up a ladder in front of my window tending to the plants growing up the side of the wall. This would've been fine if his ballsack wasn't hanging out his shorts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 837

You deserved it 1 143

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Sprinkles - 04/02/2015 07:44 - Australia

Today, I discovered my elderly neighbour likes to roam around his yard naked and wash his balls with the sprinkler. I'm never going to grab a snack in my kitchen again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 896

You deserved it 2 729

By Deconstructed - 19/05/2009 20:13 - United States

Today, my husband let me sleep in while he worked on the landscaping by our backyard pool. Ready for a shower, I stripped naked, opened the back door to let the dog out, and stepped out to ask him how it was going. Turns out he'd finally hired a landscaping crew. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 100

You deserved it 27 997

By Alexismaria - 23/10/2014 20:05 - United States

Today, I walked into the kitchen at the exact moment my uncle decided to bend over in short shorts. Apparently, his ballsack decided it needed extra room, because it dangled out of his pant leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 778

You deserved it 3 280

By Well okay then - 09/10/2016 17:12 - United States - Palmdale

Today, after letting the painters working on my house know that they're more than welcome to use my restroom, I walked outside only to find three of them pissing in my garden. One even aimed for my tomatoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 339

You deserved it 772

Avoidance issues

By ProAwkward - 18/06/2013 04:07 - United States - Grand Prairie

Today, as I was walking home, I noticed a man and a woman arguing in their driveway. To avoid an awkward situation, I crossed the street. I then had to walk past a creepy guy watering his plants in his underwear while looking directly at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 792

You deserved it 5 859

Freakshow

By iheartnjdevils - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my landlord sent tree cutters to take down a tree in our front yard. I didn't realize their job included walking around the house and gratuitously staring at me through the window as I dressed. My boyfriend won't complain because he's afraid our rent will go up in retaliation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 952

You deserved it 8 050

By Anonymous - 25/01/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, while at the urinal doing my business, my trousers fell all the way to the ground. As I bent down to pull them back up, my boss walked in the bathroom and thought I was mooning him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 957

You deserved it 3 813

By PeepShow - 06/08/2009 06:04 - United States

Today, it was just too hot. I stripped down and, being home alone, pranced around nude, lip synching and playing air guitar to some music. I was getting really into when I opened my eyes and looked out the window to see an old man with binoculars on his terrace. He wasn't birdwatching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 276

You deserved it 47 094

Bad boy!

By Carrie - 23/02/2021 21:30

Today, I was enjoying my dinner by my patio window when I spotted a cat roaming through my backyard. As I observed it explore my yard, I also watched as it climbed onto, then took a piss on the freshly clean clothes I had left to dry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 141

By cheddar - 20/07/2011 22:17 - United States

Today, I woke up feeling great. I opened up the blinds and looked out from my window just in time to see a man ripping my mailbox from the ground and sprinting away with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 446

You deserved it 2 639

magicdust95 31

Monday 21 November 2016 18:01

There's nothing like beginning the day with the sight of the sun high up in the sky and hanging ballsacks. Have a great day OP !

TacoTheDank 27

Monday 21 November 2016 18:10

Haha yes! I moderated this like two hours ago and it already has been accepted. It's a real FYL though, no one wants to see a ballsack hanging out...

Comments

One_In_Three 24

Monday 21 November 2016 17:39

I was actually expecting him to be staring at you and/or jacking off...

DannyDizzle 8

Tuesday 22 November 2016 13:53

Jacking off on a ladder is riskay business

One_In_Three 24

Tuesday 22 November 2016 16:43

Good point.

Jay18 22

Wednesday 23 November 2016 5:34

people who jack off on ladders are usually high in class

stingray112 24

Monday 21 November 2016 17:42

Gotta let the air flow sometimes

magicdust95 31

Monday 21 November 2016 18:01

There's nothing like beginning the day with the sight of the sun high up in the sky and hanging ballsacks. Have a great day OP !

dieders 24

Monday 21 November 2016 20:19

Hahaha cheers old boy

species4872 19

Monday 21 November 2016 18:05

How long did you look?

TacoTheDank 27

Monday 21 November 2016 18:10

Haha yes! I moderated this like two hours ago and it already has been accepted. It's a real FYL though, no one wants to see a ballsack hanging out...

OhPuhleeze 23

Tuesday 22 November 2016 12:27

Wow! Just how much time do you spend here mate?

MamaChey 24

Tuesday 22 November 2016 17:29

Cheddardoge - interesting how quickly your turned this FML post around and made it about you. That was talented.

TacoTheDank 27

Tuesday 22 November 2016 18:02

Obviously it was acceptable if people liked the comment so...

dieders 24

Wednesday 23 November 2016 9:34

Yeah quit steeling my glory

Wizardo 33

Monday 21 November 2016 19:38

All kinds of topiary, mainly genital themed today though.

Mynamewontfi 40

Monday 21 November 2016 19:43

The birds are chirping. The morning sun is glowing. The ballsack is dangling.

Yarecho 14

Monday 21 November 2016 19:44

The gardener is tending to something else too huh?

VikingLynne 18

Monday 21 November 2016 19:49

early seasonal greetings with Christmas balls in the window

Llyev 10

Monday 21 November 2016 19:59

I would've straight up told him his balls were sagging out.

Keywords

Transportation Cars Embarrassing Mental health Work Awkward Relatable AITA Am I overreacting? Social Media Love Annoying Family Sex Intimacy Coworkers Poopoo peepee Dentist Health Dogs Animals Sleep Cute Shopping My ex Cats Job interview Clothes Miscellaneous Weird

The Top

Today, while on vacation with my siblings and the horde of nieces and nephews, me and hubby managed to sneak in a quickie. It was a quickie alright. For the first time in our marriage he blew his load after 2 strokes because he was afraid of being interrupted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 055

You deserved it 679

Today, I took my new boyfriend's virginity about 10 minutes ago. He kept whispering, "It’s inside you, it’s actually inside you… feels kind of sticky, slippery, it’s actually inside you I can’t believe it.” It was super off-putting and a bit creepy. And no, I definitely did not orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 478

You deserved it 277

The Top

Today, I got my daughter's school pictures. Instead of smiling, she did the duck face. She's 6. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 337

You deserved it 8 381

Today, my coworker threw a bitch fit about not getting a promotion she'd applied for. My other coworker had got it, so after her fit, management worked something out: they gave the promotion to her, and the coworker that originally had it was given a promotion that I'd been promised for months. Now I have none. FML

I agree, your life sucks 821

You deserved it 101

Today, my swimming coach made us swim fifty laps non-stop as punishment for his previous class being unable to swim a drill properly. They're 8-11 year olds who are still learning to swim. I feel like my arms and legs are filled with lead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 236

You deserved it 2 357

Today, I took my date to a restaurant but I had no idea how picky of an eater she is. Our waiter had to practically use 3 pages in his notebook just to write down all her special requests for this single meal. By the end, I could see he really wanted to ask if she was being serious or taking the piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 853

You deserved it 116

Today, after drinking myself to an oblivion, I awoke with a massive hangover. I didn’t want to go to work, but every excuse I came up with in my head screamed of alcoholics. When I arrived, my boss asked me why I was there. It was my day off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 005

You deserved it 4 874

Today, I had somewhat of a nervous breakdown, and poured my heart out to a doctor, who seemed to be well over 60. She looked at me, flabbergasted and said, "I never met anyone with that many problems!" Gee, thanks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 541

You deserved it 251

Nuts

Same thing different taste

Avoidance issues

Freakshow

Bad boy!

Top comments

Comments