Intimacy: Oh yeah?

Oh yeah?

By alexis89 - 26/05/2009 16:53 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Attempting to make things a little more exciting, I said in my sexiest voice, "Oh yeah, harder." My boyfriend who apparently doesn't like talking dirty, pulled out and angrily said, "I was trying, what more do you want?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 542

You deserved it 20 194

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Same thing different taste

Orders

By belljars - 18/04/2014 02:27 - United States - Riverside

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and, in the heat of the moment, I cried out for him to go harder. He then had an exasperated expression on his face, and, in an adamantly offended tone, said, "Don't tell me what to do." Then he left the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 197

You deserved it 9 151

By Anonymous - 19/01/2016 11:03 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 311

You deserved it 2 764

Acting is hard work

By S. Dub - 10/04/2020 05:00

Today, my boyfriend told me that I needed to moan louder so that he knew I was enjoying it. Reluctantly, I put a little 'umph' into my moans during the next round. He pulled out and said, "It's just awkward now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 956

You deserved it 307

Excuuuuuuse me?

By Anonymous - 24/12/2012 13:32 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 488

You deserved it 11 509

By milked - 27/02/2015 05:28 - United States

Today, as I was about to have sex with my husband, I said I wanted to "spice things up." Apparently, our ideas weren't the same. He yanked my nipples as hard as he could and said, "Yeah, you like that?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 424

You deserved it 6 869

By picturemenakedbaby - 21/07/2009 10:42 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were on the phone. He started talking dirty, and saying how horny he was, etc. So I decided to play along and said "I want you to picture me naked, baby." All of a sudden I heard a huge sigh. He responded, "Ew, that just killed it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 970

You deserved it 12 729

By 504-A1 - 11/05/2012 22:02 - Canada - Barrie

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 517

You deserved it 10 415

Repetition

By Fuck - 25/02/2015 21:39 - United States - Fowler

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 774

You deserved it 4 441

So sensual...

By Wellokthen - 17/02/2017 22:00 - United States

Today, things began to get hot and heavy between my boyfriend and me. Suddenly, in a deep, sexy voice, he whispered, "God help me for what I'm about to do." Thinking it was just an odd manner of dirty talk, I mumbled about liking it. He then farted very loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 074

You deserved it 1 157

By uhoh - 16/02/2013 05:27 - Canada - Sechelt

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. He put me up against the wall and I yelled, "Harder!" without thinking. I heard the entire house go silent, my dad and his friends included. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 553

You deserved it 59 974

annis_fml 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 23:28

lol...he seems to have some insecurity issues

rukusrazor 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 23:31

What a loser, unless you are a constant nag, so much so that he thinks everything you say to him sounds like you're telling him what and how to do.

Comments

lonerftl 3

Tuesday 26 May 2009 23:37

lol...

sarahasnoxh 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 23:38

lol my boyfriend is the same way.

offtheheezy 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 23:38

Party Pooper. Sorry. =/

3arthb3nd3r 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 23:39

lol boyfriend fail at least it'll never happen again!

OMGQueenB 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 23:39

Ahaaaaa @ #9 and the OP. Made my day. It has occurred to me, though, that it does actually sound like you're saying "C'MON, TRY HARDER, YOU'RE SHIT". ...But hey.

alexgisforme3 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 23:41

guys are not supposed to get angry at a girl/woman, if they respect them at least.

Chocolate_Chunk 2

Monday 23 August 2010 9:35

gals are not supposed to be sexist bitches either

ballwiz23 0

Friday 18 February 2011 5:16

says who? you can respect someone and still get angry at them. sexist

xNephilim 18

Wednesday 27 June 2012 3:49

Getting mad and respect have nothing to do with each other. Jeez.

helios_rex 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 23:41

Your boyfriend is GAY, ****, FAG, FUDGE PACKER, RUMP RANGER! I'll let you get as dirty as you want when we're *******... come to daddy!!!

WomboCombo 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 23:42

There's not a man alive who doesn't like it when their property talks dirty to them. This is biggest load of bullshit I've ever read. I think I know what happened here. He was trying as hard as he could without breaking bones. But you being the **** that you and all women are are loose, like a wind tunnel. Yea I know I'm right on this one.

CrossY 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 23:42

Perhaps not the best choice of words when it comes to dirty talk, especially if he isnt in to it or you just randomly said that after months of regular sex. I can imagine getting kinda annoyed over a comment like that if you interpretate it the wrong way :D