Poor performance dude

By crybaby - 01/02/2012 08:19 - United States

Spicy
Today, it was my first time having sex with this guy. After a few second he stops, sits in the corner of his room buff-naked, with his knees up and his hands on his face. He then pouts and claims it was his worst performance ever. FML
I agree, your life sucks 35 030
You deserved it 4 225
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Top comments

iAmScrubs 19

Let's see what the judges have to say. I know Paula liked it. She's drunk so she likes everything.

328 16
thrAsHeRr9081 16

You should give him another chance. Who knows? Maybe he'll crawl into the fetal position next time.

148 5

Comments

StalinsHeir 1

But how bad was he really? You might've thought he was good but he didn't....

0 0
geod69 8

Well atleast he said it was his fault not yours

3 0
Enslaved 36

Give him some orange juice and tell him it's time for round two. Got to appreciate him wanting to be an over achieve (hopefully for your benefit). If the next time, it is seconds bad..... then you know where he stands.

2 0
perdix 29

Looks like he's straining just to achieve adequacy. He shouldn't have gone off and pouted -- he's still got 10 fingers and a tongue to entertain the OP with until he can initiate a new launch sequence ;) Always pushing that Florida orange juice, aren't you?

3 0
MrNYC 0

Give the poor kid a break.... In this day and age kids are losing there virginity at 12 years old .. And I was shocked when I read that so maybe you either need to wait till you guys get older or have sex with a more experienced guy

4 1
DocBastard 38

SOME children that young are stupid enough to do it that early, yes. The average age worldwide of kids losing their virginity is 17.3. This "Oh, young kids are doing it, so get over it!" attitude is the exact reason why the teen pregnancy rate in the US is 4 times that of Europe.

7 2
PandaLoverXD 12

I thought the reason was abstinence-only education.

1 1
MrNYC 0

Correction the average age is 14 in 2012 stats have been updated...!

0 0
beccalyn244 4

Damn sucks for you Well my 1st was awesome :)

4 10
MommaMuff 6

Try something battery powered next time.

2 0
perdix 29

Is he 70 or something? A healthy man ought to be able to get it up again fairly soon and try to get redemption for the bad opening act. Women prefer guys who can control themselves from the get-go, but many are usually willing to accept the Comeback Kid;)

1 2
Clamcreepy 7

Go comfort this whimp ,hand him a tissue, tell him to get up, dust his self off and try again. Before this dude's ego go fly from his man hood

3 0
boredfishing 0

Maybe OP is sexy and tight? Poor guy, my turn?

0 0