Miscellaneous: Quality family time

Quality family time

By really mature, GRAN - 25/12/2012 20:59 - United States - El Macero

Today, my psycho grandma yelled at me for being an "immature brat" by not offering to wash the dishes after dinner. I reminded her that when I offered last time, she raged at me for being "condescending." She responded by faking a heart attack and getting me indefinitely grounded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 778

You deserved it 3 078

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Same thing different taste

Bad influence

By Anonymous - 18/02/2012 00:58 - United States

Today, it's been one week since my demented grandma babysat my five-year-old daughter while my husband took me to a fancy restaurant. Now she's taken to screaming and calling me a "damn commie" whenever I discipline or say no to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 640

You deserved it 5 876

Why so serious?

By DwarfFrog - 18/06/2012 11:38 - United States

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 442

You deserved it 3 390

Never? NEVER?!

By Anonymous - 01/05/2020 08:00

Today, I had a fight with my grandma again with whom I've been living for four years due to college hostel being below par. She blamed me for destroying her kitchen equipment by extensively cooking, especially at night. I've never placed a foot inside her kitchen since the beginning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 585

You deserved it 176

OCD or asshole?

By Ellie - 23/07/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, I got home to my grandma yelling at the top of her lungs that I didn't do everything I was supposed to when I was home. I literally washed dishes, cleaned counters, vacuumed, gathered trash, AND cleaned the bathroom. I didn't fold my blankets. That's it. That's what she was yelling about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 496

You deserved it 100

You OK hon?

By religiunatic - 13/12/2013 17:09 - Canada - Keswick

Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off". She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language". FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 821

You deserved it 3 128

By phonesmuggler - 18/04/2013 19:30 - United States

Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 884

You deserved it 5 818

By Anonymous - 16/06/2017 06:00 - United States - North Olmsted

Today, my mom tried to ground me. In the apartment that I own. Because I didn't eat enough of the dinner that I'd made. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 811

You deserved it 389

You must conform

By lefthandspanker - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Craig

Today, my slightly batshit insane grandma called me disgusting and unladylike. Why? For writing with my left hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 332

You deserved it 1 711

By bribreeeeeezyfreshhh - 06/12/2010 17:03 - United Kingdom

Today, my grandmother told me to say "sofa king retarded" really fast. Not only did it take me several attempts to figure out what it meant, I'm now grounded by my mother for having a foul mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 941

You deserved it 27 195

By welptimetoburntheplacedown - 11/08/2014 15:02 - United States - Louisville

Today, I decided to spend a few days at my grandma's house, to help her clean the place up a bit. So far, she's given me a "no masturbating under my roof" talk, used multiple racist slurs, and yelled "QUIET DOWN!" when I so much as sneezed in the next room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 307

You deserved it 3 702

thelindseyyy 4

Wednesday 26 December 2012 5:23

...gotta love the holidays, where you're forced to deal with crazy-ass relatives.

akallaan 7

Wednesday 26 December 2012 5:23

You just can't win...

Comments

2013bchan41 20

Wednesday 26 December 2012 5:35

All the holidays the perfect time to spend with your crazy relatives

BlueMoonCafe 12

Wednesday 26 December 2012 5:36

When she has a real heart attack you can fake calling the ambulance.

RaveBlade 4

Wednesday 26 December 2012 5:40

So you propose she lets her grandma die? Wow you're a genius, here's a medal.

BlueMoonCafe 12

Wednesday 26 December 2012 5:45

Wow, that was really rude and unnecessary. It's called sarcasm for a reason.

Tali147 16

Wednesday 26 December 2012 6:42

RaveBlade - Sir, I propose we let YOU die. And we shall bury you with your precious medal.

MrSassypants 32

Wednesday 26 December 2012 7:12

So you're going to let RaveBlade die? Wow, you're a genius, here's a medal.

JAMSM 6

Wednesday 26 December 2012 10:27

Watch out, i'm a grave robber, imma take all yall's medals

anthony99 14

Wednesday 26 December 2012 5:36

Your grandmother is a sociopath

RaveBlade 4

Wednesday 26 December 2012 5:36

Well... Do like my brother : excuse yourself to the bathroom right after dinner and come out right when everything is done.

babybebop2 4

Wednesday 26 December 2012 5:36

This reminds me of Jack's mother on 30 rock

harrypotter955 19

Wednesday 26 December 2012 5:38

1-800- choke dat hoe

HouseElf 13

Wednesday 26 December 2012 7:36

Dobby is used to threats, sir. Dobby gets them five times a day at home.

seandoc 13

Wednesday 26 December 2012 5:40

Merry Christmas!

GothickNihilist 15

Wednesday 26 December 2012 5:42

I see that you grandmum likes to take things to the extreme. Maybe you can explain things to your parents. Though it's pretty hard to believe anyone would fake a heart attack, a doctor will clear that right up. Happy holidays everyone.