Intimacy: Saucy

Saucy

By donutsex - 05/08/2014 16:48 - United States - Georgetown

Today, since I work at a doughnut shop, I came home smelling like fry oil and had bits of sugar on me. My boyfriend told me he loves having sex with me right after I get off work. He said its like having sex with a hot doughnut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 246

You deserved it 9 072

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Same thing different taste

By jessica - 02/02/2011 20:59 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 363

You deserved it 7 467

Say yes

By fuckingdonuts - 18/05/2015 02:54 - United States - Edmond

Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 066

You deserved it 5 184

Wandering

By kmyltd - 14/09/2016 06:18 - Australia - Mount Eliza

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I remembered I had a Reese's Krispy Kreme doughnut in the car. I orgasmed while thinking about a doughnut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 887

You deserved it 3 619

By esb - 13/08/2009 15:23 - Canada

Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "eat it, eat it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 890

You deserved it 8 333

Turned on

By Anonymous - 31/03/2012 15:10 - United States

Today, I got sexually excited thinking about what kind of donuts I wanted to get in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 547

You deserved it 11 133

No kinkshaming here

By Anonymous - 30/09/2012 04:37 - United States - Northridge

Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 094

You deserved it 5 791

Yummy

By lovely - 26/02/2014 18:53 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be cute to put his penis through a doughnut and try to make me eat it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 128

You deserved it 10 618

By FawnPrincess - 17/11/2017 15:00

Today, my boyfriend bought my favorite doughnuts for our anniversary. After settling down and pouring a glass of wine, I grabbed a doughnut and quickly realized the filling inside wasn't jelly. He thought it would be funny to replace it with toothpaste. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 231

You deserved it 450

By Heww - 28/09/2009 06:41 - United States

Today, after working an 11 hour shift, I decided to treat myself to a delicious Krispy Kreme doughnut. When I got home, I sat down, put my feet up, poured myself a cold glass of milk. My dog jumps on my lap and vomits all over my doughnuts, stares at me then bites the doughnut out of my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 374

You deserved it 5 376

You OK, hun?

By Porche - 12/11/2015 16:24 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my boyfriend called me at work and said, "I hate to do this over the phone..." I burst into tears, thinking he was going to break up with me. Turns out he only ate my last doughnut. Now my co-workers think I'm a weirdo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 591

You deserved it 4 670

jack_jill05 14

Tuesday 5 August 2014 23:44

At least he kind of called you hot.

uhhSavage 22

Tuesday 5 August 2014 23:45

My fiancé works at a cookie store so I know how he feels.

Comments

tbon3r 15

Wednesday 6 August 2014 7:36

maybe he's a nym"food"maniac. haha :)

StzaCrack666 18

Wednesday 6 August 2014 8:20

is your boyfriend a cop?

insane_angel 8

Wednesday 6 August 2014 8:23

That actually sounds pretty good

Coccinelle_fml 15

Wednesday 6 August 2014 8:27

Hardly an FML, I think it's kind of adorable actually.

jonbee1212 2

Wednesday 6 August 2014 8:29

HAHAHAHAH

ZY1431 24

Wednesday 6 August 2014 8:41

I work at a donut shop and I cant stand the smell I gather, he must have a fetish lol

caleb_9756 14

Wednesday 6 August 2014 8:58

I don't see the downside to this

albertozeta_fml 9

Wednesday 6 August 2014 9:39

Honestly I totally agree with him, it has to be fantastic!

orsombre_fml 11

Wednesday 6 August 2014 9:44

Make sure you keep this job OP!

Teletubbyterror 5

Wednesday 6 August 2014 10:37

Is that bad?

Keywords

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I agree, your life sucks 15

You deserved it 18

Today, my girlfriend will only have sex when she's on her period, because it's the only time she gets horny. She also gets body acne, bloating, and utterly foul BO and gas. The sex is so unpleasant, I'm starting to wish she just got cranky and emotional. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 211

The Top

Today, I had to do a Google Image search to prove to my 32-year-old husband that road runners are real animals, and not just made up for Looney Toons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 754

You deserved it 463

Today, I just finished nearly a year of muscle-building in order to impress my crush. Turns out she doesn't date fit guys, because "they're all jerks". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 645

You deserved it 17 656

Today, my 7 year old daughter explained to a taxi driver that she was born from my "vagina that doesn't have hair". He winked creepily at me and said, "I bet it doesn't." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 027

You deserved it 5 844

Today, while working at Lowe's, I had to deal with a situation in one of the bathroom aisles. Unfortunately, it wasn’t someone sitting on one of the toilets. It was two guys fucking in one of the shower displays. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 775

You deserved it 357

Today, I'm getting married. A few months ago, I allowed my mother in-law to take care of catering. She begged to be a part of the wedding, so I gave her the caterer's number and order info. It appears that I will not be eating at my own wedding because she decided to order food I'm allergic to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 806

You deserved it 6 800

Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 791

You deserved it 4 108