Intimacy: Saucy

Saucy

By donutsex - 05/08/2014 16:48 - United States - Georgetown

Today, since I work at a doughnut shop, I came home smelling like fry oil and had bits of sugar on me. My boyfriend told me he loves having sex with me right after I get off work. He said its like having sex with a hot doughnut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 246

You deserved it 9 072

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Same thing different taste

By jessica - 02/02/2011 20:59 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 363

You deserved it 7 467

Say yes

By fuckingdonuts - 18/05/2015 02:54 - United States - Edmond

Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 065

You deserved it 5 184

Wandering

By kmyltd - 14/09/2016 06:18 - Australia - Mount Eliza

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I remembered I had a Reese's Krispy Kreme doughnut in the car. I orgasmed while thinking about a doughnut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 887

You deserved it 3 619

By esb - 13/08/2009 15:23 - Canada

Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "eat it, eat it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 890

You deserved it 8 333

Turned on

By Anonymous - 31/03/2012 15:10 - United States

Today, I got sexually excited thinking about what kind of donuts I wanted to get in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 547

You deserved it 11 133

No kinkshaming here

By Anonymous - 30/09/2012 04:37 - United States - Northridge

Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 094

You deserved it 5 791

Yummy

By lovely - 26/02/2014 18:53 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be cute to put his penis through a doughnut and try to make me eat it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 127

You deserved it 10 618

By FawnPrincess - 17/11/2017 15:00

Today, my boyfriend bought my favorite doughnuts for our anniversary. After settling down and pouring a glass of wine, I grabbed a doughnut and quickly realized the filling inside wasn't jelly. He thought it would be funny to replace it with toothpaste. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 230

You deserved it 450

By Heww - 28/09/2009 06:41 - United States

Today, after working an 11 hour shift, I decided to treat myself to a delicious Krispy Kreme doughnut. When I got home, I sat down, put my feet up, poured myself a cold glass of milk. My dog jumps on my lap and vomits all over my doughnuts, stares at me then bites the doughnut out of my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 373

You deserved it 5 376

You OK, hun?

By Porche - 12/11/2015 16:24 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my boyfriend called me at work and said, "I hate to do this over the phone..." I burst into tears, thinking he was going to break up with me. Turns out he only ate my last doughnut. Now my co-workers think I'm a weirdo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 590

You deserved it 4 670

jack_jill05 14

Tuesday 5 August 2014 23:44

At least he kind of called you hot.

uhhSavage 22

Tuesday 5 August 2014 23:45

My fiancé works at a cookie store so I know how he feels.

Comments

BabyrooKid 11

Thursday 7 August 2014 4:53

There's a joke about a doughnut hole in there somewhere ...

Memma_fml 14

Thursday 7 August 2014 5:03

That's not too bad.

nlow79 3

Thursday 7 August 2014 5:23

aaannnddd.... this is a problem how?

btracy619 23

Thursday 7 August 2014 6:18

Next time bring him a doughnut to stick his dick in.

killer0689 20

Thursday 7 August 2014 14:27

though OP already has got a doughnut hole for her bf

leonlee2002 10

Thursday 7 August 2014 7:18

Umm... Why does he know what having sex with a doughnut feels like

Shade1982 20

Thursday 7 August 2014 12:36

Well, it has a hole doesn't it?

Realhomesley 5

Thursday 7 August 2014 8:14

Can't vote on this one. As a guy I'd say it's a compliment.

SanpakuEyes 18

Thursday 7 August 2014 16:20

Could be worse, you could work at a sewage plant, or a slaughter house. Then coming home smelling like work wouldn't be nearly as much fun.

baristalbc 18

Friday 8 August 2014 2:26

You have a partner that likes having sex with you and a sure fire way of reliably turning him on. Don't question it while you have it.

kiwikz13 6

Friday 8 August 2014 5:01

Idk, guys love their food and sex. I once had a guy that said he wanted to cover me in maple syrup and popcorn and lick it all off... (._.)

maggiefox 25

Saturday 9 August 2014 8:51

¿I don't see the problem here?

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The Top

Today, I went to my room to find my girlfriend on the floor, butt up, with her pants down. I elatedly took the invitation and dropped my pants too, only for her to tell me, "Not so fast champ, I'm trying to force some farts out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 064

You deserved it 453

Today, the guy I'd been talking to online and liked came to my house party with a bunch of mutual friends. He spent the night sitting in the corner on the sofa talking to my cat. I woke up later to see that not only had he crashed for the night, but he'd curled up in the dog basket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 684

You deserved it 9 289

The Top

Today, my roommate told me that I have to find a new place to live because I make his new girlfriend uncomfortable. I just had surgery and am bedridden. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 716

You deserved it 186

Today, at 5:30 in the morning while I was fast asleep, my cat decided the most threatening thing in my apartment that absolutely needed to be attacked was my left nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 972

You deserved it 4 661

Today, for the first time in my life, I sent a dickpic to a girl I had been talking to for a few days on Snapchat. Even though she had asked me for it, when she saw the pic, she blocked me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 881

You deserved it 976

Today, I confronted my friend about the £260 he owes me. He got offended and said, "Friends don't have to pay back." He called me selfish and walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 696

You deserved it 2 207

Today, my boyfriend told me that when my nipples are hard, he thinks that they look like giant zits, and when he squeezes them, he imagines them popping pus. He then reached for my chest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 947

You deserved it 2 772

Today, my father accused me of not taking care of my 15-month-old son, who is putting on weight slowly because of starting to walk and run. Come on, for a man who sees his grandchildren two or three times a year and never gives his daughter a call, who gave him the courage? FML

I agree, your life sucks 946

You deserved it 123