Sex, Cheating and Love: Scoundrel

Scoundrel

By oops123 - 15/04/2009 18:42 - United States

Today, I finally hooked up with a guy I've been hanging out with for 2 months. Afterwards, while we're getting dressed he says "You better be clean. If you're not tell me now so I don't pass it on to my girlfriend." Stunned, all I could say was, "Girlfriend?!" His reply, "Well, technically, my fiancée." FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 396

You deserved it 14 238

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Same thing different taste

Douche

By YouDontSay - 10/05/2015 15:35 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 583

You deserved it 6 917

By ahhh - 03/08/2015 06:06 - United States - Northbrook

Today, my boyfriend of 2 months and I had sex for the first time last night. This afternoon he texted me saying, "I had an amazing night with you yesterday." Following that text he said, "I forgot to tell you I have an STD." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 981

You deserved it 7 356

By impure - 29/09/2014 16:48 - United States

Today, I found out I have an STD, courtesy of my girlfriend. Funnily enough, she was clean when we first started dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 226

You deserved it 4 530

By doomed - 22/08/2009 17:46 - United States

Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 433

You deserved it 6 700

By Anonymous - 05/04/2009 09:43 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend of 3 months and I were in the middle of a heavy make-out session when his cell rang. Normally, he'd ignore it. This time however he pushed me off of him and said "Shit! It's probably my girlfriend!" I thought I was his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 161 912

You deserved it 16 404

By taylor w - 31/10/2014 02:32 - United States

Today, I found out the guy I've been dating for 5 months is engaged to his girlfriend of 3 years. I found out as we were talking, waiting for him to come outside after work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 713

You deserved it 3 541

Nope

By Anonymous - 07/04/2023 16:00

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of two years. I got a call from my best friend telling me he had slept with her before we went out drinking the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 280

You deserved it 159

By Anonymous - 22/05/2009 22:24 - United States

Today, I decided to give my virginity to my boyfriend of four months, because I told him I loved him. Two minutes after he'd pulled out, he grabs his cell and mass texts "I FINALLY GOT LAID!". FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 149

You deserved it 26 257

By wtfjusthappened - 31/01/2014 15:29 - United States - Redmond

Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 830

You deserved it 13 049

By Anonymous - 10/05/2019 16:00

Today, the guy I've been talking to for two months told me he hooked up with a girl last night, before blocking me on everything. I also was with him last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 891

You deserved it 202

I_am_stupid_also 6

Thursday 16 April 2009 1:23

Tell him there is a rash that has been bothering you, but you need some cash to go get it checked out.

TouchDown_fml 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 1:18

Well now it's time to get her number or Fackbook page :-)

Comments

Chibi_Mia_Chula 0

Sunday 2 May 2010 6:10

What a jerk. You should have slapped him.

omgwtf99 13

Sunday 6 June 2010 18:54

u shoulda told him u had aids

RecklessxDoll 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 11:40

I have guys trying to be funny with me just on the first meeting! obviously I rejected their advances. how can you be so easy?

TheyCallMeThumpe_fml 0

Monday 9 August 2010 1:58

ydi for being a **** and sleeping with a guy you barely know because you've been "hanging out for 2 months" smh

Crista_hurt 0

Monday 11 October 2010 0:52

What does ydi mean

llllJakubllll 0

Friday 19 November 2010 0:40

shit is just funny

barbiegirl491 1

Thursday 7 April 2011 21:52

what a dick.

kat815 0

Monday 16 May 2011 11:58

after hanging out for 2 months that might have been something he could have mentioned what a dick

xxScarletxx 3

Thursday 23 June 2011 22:52

Ask him for her cellphone # or name and call/search her and then tell her what he did(: WIN-WIN.

alyrawr 2

Saturday 9 July 2011 7:53

The same thing happened to me, the best u can do is get revenge and make him wish he were never born :)

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my son invited me to his first standup comedy gig. I accepted, only to later suffer through an hour of the worst jokes I've heard in my entire life. It was so bad, he made Dane Cook look like a comic genius, and I had to resist heckling him. Hours later, I still feel vaguely suicidal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 937

You deserved it 6 045

Today, I had to pick up my brother and his girlfriend from the bar at 2:00am because they were too drunk to drive themselves and had no money for an Uber. Five minutes into the ride, they started going at it in the back of my car. I don't think I'll be doing favors again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 648

You deserved it 532

The Top

Today, I found out my new puppy has worms by him scooting his butt across my new carpet. It's like smeared spaghetti. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 142

You deserved it 2 716

Today, I stayed up all night to study for my anatomy final at 9 a.m. I studied outside the testing room in the hall all night. Apparently, I fell asleep with my headphones on, as my friend woke me up after walking out of the test, asking how I did. 300 classmates walked by and no one woke me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 144

You deserved it 15 569

Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 462

You deserved it 3 712

Today, my boss told me to sort and file all the paperwork he'd been randomly shoving into boxes since 2010. Apparently we're being audited, so he expects me to do eight years of filing in two weeks. There's enough paper to fully stock a large public library. Two weeks my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 176

You deserved it 292

Today, my bio teacher decided to put a plant in his classroom, and I'm allergic to it. Apparently, my hives and runny nose aren't enough to convince him to get rid of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 882

You deserved it 1 720

Today, in the middle of hot passionate sex with my husband, he stops and tells me he won't be able to finish until I go brush my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 609

You deserved it 41 642

Scoundrel

Same thing different taste

Douche

Nope

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