Work, Awkward and Drugs: Sketchy

Sketchy

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, it was my first day with new contacts, but I found out they make my eyes red and itchy. Today was also the day I had a very important meeting. They think I showed up stoned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 300

You deserved it 3 460

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Same thing different taste

By nzkristy - 03/01/2010 10:59 - New Zealand

Today, I got sent home from work for appearing stoned/under the influence of drugs. I suffer from severe hay fever, which no antihistamine has fixed yet, hence the red and glassy eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 953

You deserved it 2 282

By creepyeyes - 21/06/2009 18:37 - Canada

Today, I got myself a cool pair of colored contacts. I was wearing them while at home, so that I'll get used to them. Then I had to go to a job interview. I forgot to take them out. I went to a job interview with zebra-print eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 002

You deserved it 68 591

Don't try this at home

By Lunar-Spice - 07/11/2020 08:01

Today, I found out what it feels like to put in a contact while drunk. My eye still hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 271

You deserved it 816

By dragynfyre - 06/03/2012 05:37 - United States

Today, my boss called me out for a drug test. His reason was because my eyes are puffy and bloodshot, making me look high. I've been suffering from allergies all week, but still had to pee in a cup in front of a complete stranger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 908

You deserved it 2 132

By Customer Stonage Representative - 21/10/2011 12:10 - Canada

Today, still suffering from an eye infection, I received a customer complaint. Having red eyes, asking how a patron's day went, and thanking them as they left my register obviously means that I must be stoned out of my mind. Apparently I've moved to a city where you must be on drugs if you're nice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 864

You deserved it 2 527

By Anonymous - 13/08/2009 23:14 - United States

Today, I went to the eye doctor. He tells me that I've developed a severe allergy to contact lenses and must stop wearing them immediately. It wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't just visited him a week earlier, paid for a new prescription and ordered a year's worth of brand new lenses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 748

You deserved it 4 008

By Phabia - 21/04/2015 00:16 - United States - Newton

Today, I was sent to the front office for having blood shot eyes and smelling like smoke. I just didn't get enough sleep and had trouble putting my contacts in, and I always smell like smoke because of my parents' excessive smoking. They didn't believe me. My parents had to come in to back me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 965

You deserved it 2 338

Leave it to the pros

By Anonymous - 05/11/2021 00:01 - United States - Epsom

Today, I was attempting to tame my bushy eyebrows, since I'm starting a new job in a few days and need to look somewhat presentable, when I poked myself in the eye. Hard. I thought I’d blinded myself for a few moments. Now it’s just red, sore and watery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 239

By Anonymous - 01/11/2014 15:28 - Canada - Sooke

Today, I had to show up at an anti-drugs lecture with full-blown pink eye. It's from an ongoing bacterial infection, but the speaker said he'd heard that excuse a hundred times before, and shamed me in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 533

You deserved it 3 022

By l0stnwundrland - 24/01/2011 08:01 - United States

Today, I went to the eye doctor. For the past three days every time I wear my glasses I become nauseous, get migraines, and have that "fish-eye view" where everything is rounded. Turns out they placed my lenses on the wrong sides. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 822

You deserved it 3 056

Lehk 9

Friday 4 December 2009 23:18

you should have made a show of putting in some vizine and told them "forgive me, my new contacts are bothering my eyes"

sdcrazy1018 0

Friday 4 December 2009 23:30

I'm sure someone said something about your eyes to you....and guess what? All you had to say was, "Yea my contacts are bothering me." Yea, this is real FML-worthy *shakes head*

Comments

Fabby_fml 2

Friday 4 December 2009 23:34

Yeah, because there's no reason for your eyes to be red other than being stoned. My eyes are red all the time, usually people assume it's because I'm tired. Unless they're stoners, of course. e_e

Flounder 2

Friday 4 December 2009 23:38

Unless you're a naturally slow mover/talker or speak in a disorganized fashion, no one's going to think you're stoned just because you have red eyes. And if they do, all that means is that they are highly uneducated about the effects of marijuana and simply buy into the "RED EYES - YOU'RE TRIPPING BALLS!!!!11!!" hysteria.

monbon6788 0

Friday 4 December 2009 23:42

this is probably one of those things where everyone stands around thinking he's stoned and talk about it behind OP's back, but no one actually says it to his face. all the while he think nothing's wrong. then later he overhears people talking about it or a friend fills him in. FYL, OP.

Starfire22 5

Friday 4 December 2009 23:45

Don't lie, we know that you took a hit before your meeting! Don't worry, we won't tell... maybe;D

bexox 0

Friday 4 December 2009 23:50

Go back to the optometrist. They can give you some new contacts or drops.

nm22395 0

Friday 4 December 2009 23:51

plethora 3

Friday 4 December 2009 23:55

Every optometrist will tell you not to wear contacts for a full day the first time. A couple of hours, then take them out; a bit longer the next time, then take them out; etc, etc, etc. Therefore, YDI.

Norwegian_Wood 4

Saturday 5 December 2009 5:56

Not every. Mine certainly didn't. Then again, he barely talked at all... OP FYL if you got a doc like mine that didn't tell you anything. And definitely go back and complain and try other contacts. I'm going through the same thing right now, trying to find contacts that are good. The first pair I had really irritated my eyes.