Sex, Teenagers and Intimacy: Smash the Patriarchy

Smash the Patriarchy

By Alfie4 - 05/03/2012 22:30 - United Kingdom

Today, my son asked me for advice over his girlfriend not "respecting" his pathetic need for near-constant sex. I got so bored listening to the misogynistic horseshit spewing out of his mouth that I totally zoned out. I came to as he started hurling abuse at me for not siding with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 078

You deserved it 10 773

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

The struggle

By Anonymous - 06/08/2024 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my son came to complain that all he and his girlfriend do is have sex, yet never talk to each other. As his dad, I tried to give him good advice, but as his mom makes me miserable every time she opens her mouth, it was a struggle to think what to say. In fact, he’s living my idea of paradise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 183

Armchair psychologist

By Mom - 27/11/2023 07:30

Today, I spent yet another lunch venting to my best friend about how much I hate my teenage son's girlfriend, thinking he should be with someone less outspoken. Apparently she got tired of listening because she eventually snapped, "Oh for god's sake, just admit you want to fuck your son already!" and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95

You deserved it 1 195

Protips from Dad

By Anonymous - 08/01/2023 15:00

Today, my son asked his mom about sex, so she talked about love, marriage, God, affection and all that bollocks, missing the point that he wanted to know about having good sex since he has a girlfriend now, so I explained all the wet, squishy practical bits of sex. Now my wife is mad at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 536

You deserved it 1 252

By wish.was.single - 25/01/2012 18:33 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend kept whining at me, asking why I wouldn't have sex with him, seemingly not caring that my parents were in the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 044

You deserved it 5 684

Young love

By Anonymous - 11/12/2021 17:02

Today, I walked in on my son having sex with his girlfriend. An hour later, I did it again and got quite annoyed, and yelled at them for having sex again. He said, "What do you mean again? We haven’t finished yet." My son has been having sex for over an hour. Man, do I feel inadequate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 2 004

Motormouth

By Anonymous - 17/08/2020 17:08

Today, my boyfriend and I were riding in the back seat of his mom’s car and she kept talking at him non-stop. He responded only in grunts. When at some point I informed her that her son had been asleep for several minutes, she just kept on talking to him anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 104

You deserved it 117

By Anonymous - 19/04/2013 23:33 - Sweden - Ljungby

Today, I grounded my son after finding out that he's been bullying other kids at school. He got mad and screamed at me, calling me a "bastard". Instead of defending me, my wife got pissed and accused me of having taught our son to swear like that. I can never win. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 145

You deserved it 6 039

Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out

By Mom - 17/07/2023 15:00

Today, I told my 21 year-old son he either has to break up with his girlfriend, who fills his head with lies about me, or I'd stop speaking to him. He laughed and said he'd fine with us not speaking ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 308

You deserved it 1 461

The Manosphere is like the Metaverse for morons

By get the fuck out! - 04/07/2023 22:00

Today, I overheard my husband’s disgusting misogynist brother saying that I shouldn’t be allowed to discipline my son, because “it’ll turn him into one of those pussy ass soyboy simps that listens to bitches.” My husband didn’t even back me when I told the douche to leave our house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 964

You deserved it 226

Get out of there!

By Anonymous - 21/04/2021 15:30 - United States - Durham

Today, after I can't count how many times, my boyfriend of 5 years decided to break MORE things in our home, because I asked him not to let our son speak to me rudely. His response, "He said 'OK' so you should have shut up." Basically, he's raising my kid to treat me like he does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 121

You deserved it 613

lthoyal 8

Tuesday 6 March 2012 2:11

I sense a castration for your son in the near future.

MerrikBarbarian 9

Tuesday 6 March 2012 2:16

Time to train that child! Be a parent and teach them to respect women... It any romantic partner regardless of gender for that matter

Comments

rastafarhi 0

Wednesday 7 March 2012 5:01

How does one throw abuse?

VampasarousRex 6

Wednesday 7 March 2012 15:02

That unbelievable horse-shit spewing son of yours..

StromyG2 10

Wednesday 7 March 2012 18:57

FYL because you raised that child.

l0v3p4in 7

Wednesday 7 March 2012 22:40

Like father like son.

kalbrek009 20

Wednesday 7 March 2012 23:41

Time to take him to see a therapist, & if that doesn't help, give him a large tube of lube & buy him a sex doll he can disrespect instead of a real human...jk. Obviously he has a problem #1: He doesn't respect women & therefore shouldn't be with one until he learns how, & #2: If he "feels" a "near constant need for sex", then he needs his head examined to find out why he has such an obsession...get him to a shrink ASAP! You don't want him becoming a serial rapist (later in life) with his current attitude towards women or becoming a registered sex offender because his gf/gf's parents press charges (if he &/or his gf are under 18) when he won't stop or take "No" for an answer.

HEADSTRONG1994 0

Wednesday 7 March 2012 23:45

I agree with #7. What you said was pretty ridiculous. I'm a psych major and it sound to me like you have some sexual issues you need to work out if you're that jealous of your son for gettin laid more than you