Pregnancy, Awkward, Thief and Miscellaneous: Surprise !

That's why I have a password on my phone. If my phone gets stolen and they "slide to unlock" I have a 4 digit password you need to type to get in my phone. If you have an iphone you may wanna do that so it doesn't happen again. FYL

slapsface 10

Wednesday 29 August 2012 18:25

I would of done the same thing

doglover100 28

Tuesday 11 December 2012 3:03

That sucks yet I find it funny

vffjvsegb 11

Monday 9 September 2013 2:08

"So mom, bout that text..."

obeykaitlyn 25

Monday 20 January 2014 1:08

I guess that's why you put a password on your phone

Crossbowe 13

Sunday 26 October 2014 3:45

a minute later "jk"

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend threatened to leave me unless we get married within a year and have a baby. I don’t negotiate with terrorists but now I’m gonna be single and alone over Christmas, unless I wheedle myself into my brother's Christmas, but I think I’d just ruin it for his family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 450

You deserved it 149

Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 029

You deserved it 3 407

The Top

Today, I got laid off from work. I was being escorted to the elevator when another coworker stepped inside. He said, "How goes it?" I said, "It goes." Then he said, "At least we have a job." FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 150

You deserved it 3 680

Today my husband went to buy a car from some guy from Facebook. He ended up giving the guy $1000 upfront before receiving the title or bill of sale. So now, we have a car we can't use, we're completely broke now and the guy is ghosting us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 511

You deserved it 1 091

Today, I fell asleep while lifeguarding, thinking I could get away with it due to my sunglasses. When I woke up, I saw my boss waving at me. Apparently she'd been trying to get my attention for five minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 569

You deserved it 70 004

Today, I was sitting in my garage with a fan on my face because it was hot when a suicidal cricket decided to jump into the blades, causing his cricket guts to be sprayed onto my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 840

You deserved it 224

Today, after paying back the money my grandma lent me to fix my car, I stepped outside, only to see my car leaking antifreeze all over the driveway. I had to ask for the money back to fix it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 287

You deserved it 3 900

Today, someone rear-ended me while I was on my way home. I was extremely upset and I called my boyfriend for comfort and to help inspect the damage. After taking a good look at the car, he said, "Damn, if only you fucked this hard." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 573

You deserved it 9 654