Birthday, Mysterious, Confused and Health: Suspicious minds - FML

Suspicious minds

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I missed my own surprise party because, having heard it being planned, I thought it was going to be an intervention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 128

You deserved it 45 344

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Top comments

Aoifexzx 3

Tuesday 5 October 2010 19:15

YDI. if u thought ur friends might have reason for intervention

dealwithlife 0

Tuesday 5 October 2010 19:14

that's funny. sucks for you, though. intervention 4 wat????

Comments

perdix 29

Tuesday 5 October 2010 20:44

Instead of wanting you to stop getting wasted or drunk all the time, they wanted to get you either totally baked or completely plastered! Boy, did you ever read that wrong!

Jessi2487 0

Tuesday 5 October 2010 20:47

need an intervention? there's an app for that.

stewpididiot 11

Tuesday 5 October 2010 20:55

just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you

Richisme 0

Tuesday 5 October 2010 21:14

If they ate your surprise cake, FYL #2 :O

driftability 0

Tuesday 5 October 2010 21:24

Are you missing your stash?.

AtrumMessor 1

Tuesday 5 October 2010 21:43

YDI for needing an intervention...

Dretail 0

Tuesday 5 October 2010 23:03

hmmm so sad

beeffyboy 0

Tuesday 5 October 2010 23:25

should it of been?

RedPillSucks 31

Wednesday 6 October 2010 1:00

You actually passed up a plausible reason to get drunk or stoned because you were afraid people would try to stop you from getting drunk or stoned? Oh the karmic irony.

dealwithitkid 0

Wednesday 6 October 2010 1:29

dumbassss

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, my son asked for my help with a personal matter. I was flattered that he trusted me, since he's a paranoid, untrusting psycho. Turned out he wanted to use my locksmith skills to break into his ex's house and "teach her a lesson" for breaking up with him after he cheated on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 848

You deserved it 5 421

Today, I gave birth to my firstborn child. Somehow, my mom and mother-in-law made their way to the delivery room, and walked in mid-push. While they were escorted out, I overheard my mother-in-law asking the nurse how her son, my husband, was holding up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 555

You deserved it 1 098

The Top

Today, I tried to prove to my girlfriend how much I've matured and that our relationship comes before anything else in my life. So I went to delete my character in World of Warcraft. I tried to confirm it, but I couldn't, breaking down in tears instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 356

You deserved it 31 443

Today, I bought a cool new pair of sunglasses. I wore them today, and all day I kept getting comments about how much I looked like Ozzy Osbourne and John Lennon. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 417

You deserved it 13 326

Today, I went on a date with my boyfriend to our local park, and I playfully climbed into one of the baby swings. I planned on having him push me, not getting stuck and having to be cut free from the seat while he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 623

You deserved it 41 585

Today, I waited thirty minutes for a bus that stopped running three weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 332

You deserved it 6 802

Today, after I'd been working a 14-hour day, my wife texted me to tell me how she would like to kill me. Apparently, the lid to the garlic container was not screwed on tight enough and it spilled all in the fridge. How is that my fault? FML

I agree, your life sucks 441

You deserved it 156

Today, I've known that I'm dyspraxic for a long time. It was a real eye-opener when I found out about it, but there's still one problem: the majority of the population seems to be incapable of understanding the condition. I still get bullied for not being able to do simple tasks, even with the diagnosis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 811

You deserved it 147