Mental health, Depression, Parents and Dad jokes: Thanks, I hate it

Thanks, I hate it

By Anonymous - 07/01/2011 02:45 - United States

Today, feeling melancholic, I took a blanket out to the backyard and lay down to look at the clouds. My dad came out to ask me what I was doing. I told him, he smirked, squatted over my face, and farted. He then ran back inside and told my mom. She laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 216

You deserved it 6 252

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 08/08/2015 05:18 - Canada

Today, I witnessed my dad wake himself from a nap with his own fart and start panicking in confusion. I guess I shouldn't have broken down laughing, because he demanded to know what I did to him. He didn't believe the truth and bitched me out for screwing around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 553

You deserved it 2 159

Vicious dog

By onefmlafteranother - 15/11/2019 01:00

Today, I was laying my head on my dad's dog when he walked in. I jokingly asked my dad, "I'm cuddling with your dog, are you jealous?" At that moment, the dog lets a massive, earth-quaking fart and my dad promptly responded, "Nope!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 686

You deserved it 585

By longlostkid556 - 05/06/2011 04:14 - United States

Today, the girl I have a crush on came over to work on a project. My dad rushed into the room we were in, farted, and then ran out giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 228

You deserved it 5 812

By UncleMonkey - 06/03/2015 06:18 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, while flirting with a cute nurse at my dad's bedside, I accidentally let a noxious fart slip out and she thought the foul smell came from my sleeping father soiling himself. I let her roll him over and check his ass while he cried out in pain because I wasn't man enough to own up to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 580

You deserved it 45 212

By sick of this shit - 12/03/2016 13:33 - United States - West Grove

Today, my dad opened my fridge, let rip a horrible fart into it, then closed it and said "There ya go, a little somethin' for supper." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 950

You deserved it 1 753

Convoluted

By Anonymous - 14/11/2023 04:00

Today, while at home, I accidentally let out a big, loud fart near my dad. When he asked what the noise was, I blamed it on the cat. I remembered too late that we don't have a cat. My dad caught on quickly and grounded me for lying in front of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 138

You deserved it 716

By byebyeromance - 26/08/2014 01:03 - United States - State College

Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 314

You deserved it 5 072

By Anonymous - 23/11/2014 12:52 - United Kingdom

Today, my grandpa came into my room and asked for a pen. As I gave it to him, he let rip the foulest fart I've ever smelled in my life, and walked out without a word. 2 hours later, the smell is not only still there, it's filled the room. Looks like I'm sleeping downstairs on the couch tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 313

You deserved it 2 984

By Anonymous - 18/01/2011 08:28 - United States

Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said, "That was my daughter." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 167

You deserved it 3 833

Believe her next time

By KICKxASSxNINJA - 26/09/2020 08:02 - United States - Fresno

Today, my mother bolted into my room and let out a huge fart that smelled like rotten meat because she wanted to prove a point, that she had been having intestinal problems for three days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 219

You deserved it 224

omgshaylaaa 0

Friday 7 January 2011 9:06

haha yay dad

hiddydiddy 0

Friday 7 January 2011 9:08

Im sorry, but u have a funny dad :)

Comments

benderbang48 4

Friday 7 January 2011 9:35

******* emo

xteldridgex 0

Friday 7 January 2011 10:28

please shut your mouth. you knowing absolutely nothing, will help you in this peticular task. thank you. have a good day. :-)

spanelli 16

Friday 7 January 2011 10:38

The OP is a genre of music? Oh shit...

SomePinkTape 0

Friday 7 January 2011 12:02

xteldridgex instead of a comma I think you meant to put "that".

Mysanitywins 10

Friday 7 January 2011 13:18

Coming from what looks like a ten year old :/

rowbot4 0

Friday 7 January 2011 9:35

hopefully you don't get the pink eye!

2fknreaL 0

Friday 7 January 2011 9:38

Awesome family!!! Sounds like something my family would do! The fart game *sigh* memories. Did you have your mouth open? lmao!

maskedman 9

Friday 7 January 2011 11:08

Are you from the Murphy family?

flammenhund 4

Friday 7 January 2011 9:41

Your dad is BOSS!!!!

Mirorbo 26

Friday 7 January 2011 9:42

This sounds like something from that silly tv show my boys watch all the time...

maybaybe 0

Friday 7 January 2011 9:49

Ew, that's so gross :/ and your mother found it funny? Move out as soon as you can, OP.

NGH97 0

Friday 7 January 2011 13:04

Guuurlplease 0

Friday 7 January 2011 9:57

LOL.

xmarkstheheart 0

Friday 7 January 2011 9:58

So...your parents are in preschool? Or were they raised in a frat house?? Worst parents ever.

PahhDee 0

Friday 7 January 2011 9:59

lmao!

xmarkstheheart 0

Friday 7 January 2011 10:02

Farts contain millions of fecal particles. In effect, your dad LITERALLY shit in your face! And those people who think that it's funny need to die. Now. Violently.