Intimacy: That's one way to start the weekend

That's one way to start the weekend

By Monkey - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my mom called me from jail. She was arrested for having sex in public. I was with my dad when I got the call. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 657

You deserved it 3 089

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Top comments

JiggaJayZ 16

Saturday 27 October 2012 19:53

Everyone always wondered why you don't have any of your dads features

misspulkadot24 17

Saturday 27 October 2012 19:56

This is one of those double whammy FML's. It's like life gave you a one two punch to the nuts.

Comments

TADspace 30

Saturday 27 October 2012 23:02

Was it rape? Rape is just sex in public you know. God said so. He also said you should love each other but **** that shit, kk?

funrush 2

Saturday 27 October 2012 23:11

Need her number! Lol

sugoine 12

Saturday 27 October 2012 23:19

You are pond scum

baconftw 9

Saturday 27 October 2012 23:46

Public sex is over-rated anyway.

gregkingsley 4

Saturday 27 October 2012 23:48

I do feel sorry for the OP but look at it this way u get 2 Christmas and 2 birthdays now

KiddNYC1O 20

Sunday 28 October 2012 0:05

Damn. Cheating ***** or not, still his/her mom.

AngelEyes2182 0

Sunday 28 October 2012 0:08

Oh jeeze. I'll bet that was fun explainin.

Eorlas 31

Sunday 28 October 2012 0:20

So not cool! FYdad's life :( and of course yours now that it's going to make the living situation so bad.

Sai_Run614 7

Sunday 28 October 2012 0:27

Hall pass

friscosoonerkid 3

Sunday 28 October 2012 1:25

I would of just left her there.

yenidewi 11

Sunday 28 October 2012 1:48

so sorry to know that ...

Keywords

Embarrassing Transportation Cars Relatable Work Mental health Awkward Social Media Love AITA Am I overreacting? Family Annoying Sex Intimacy Coworkers Poopoo peepee Health Dentist Dogs Animals Cute Sleep Shopping My ex Cats Clothes Job interview Miscellaneous Weird

The Top

Today, to celebrate moving into a new apartment, my girlfriend decided she would get a kitten. She didn't know I'm allergic to cats. When I told her, she decided that she couldn't date someone who couldn't be around her cat; the one she doesn't have yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 443

You deserved it 3 015

Today, my girl was giving me a BJ when my dog started howling. She keeps going; my dog keeps howling. She stops, my dog stops. We start getting it on again and my girl starts giving me a BJ again; my dog starts howling louder this time. So we stop. My dog stopped me from getting some. This is a first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 123

You deserved it 244

The Top

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for well over an hour while riding it up to my weight and fitness class. Very funny, universe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 036

You deserved it 9 475

Today, I met a great guy at the bar, and we went back to my place. He left before I woke up, leaving a badly-scrawled note saying, "Gone to work, call me!" I couldn't make out the number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 615

You deserved it 7 451

Today, while at my parent's house I decided to take a shower. I had to use my sister's bathroom and once out, grabbed a comb from her cupboard to brush my hair. I then noticed the clumps of hair on my shoulders. It's a razor comb on one side, regular on the other. I used the wrong side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 474

You deserved it 18 084

Today, I found out that it's extremely difficult to take a dump while holding a cup under your ass for a lab specimen. I also found out that you get so nervous that you can actually forget to lock the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 876

You deserved it 5 678

Today, I got a phone call from my cheating ex, asking if I would go out with him tonight. After 3 years of no contact, I decided to give him another chance and gave him my address for his GPS. I was then told that I lived too far and he didn't want to drive. He cancelled. I live 15 minutes away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 870

You deserved it 28 227

Today, I'm at the age where I'm supposed to be having the time of my life. I'm short and look so young that I get asked if I'm still in high school. Every girl I've ever known looks at me like a "little brother". The only girls who have shown interest are still too young to vote. I'm missing out on my 20s. FML

I agree, your life sucks 461

You deserved it 152