Sex, Awkward and Intimacy: There's a time and a place - FML

There's a time and a place

By Hanna - 03/04/2011 17:55 - United States

Spicy

Today, while driving with my step mother, she attempted to have phone sex with my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 670

You deserved it 4 667

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 23/02/2012 20:25 - United States

Spicy

Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 819

You deserved it 37 526

By 0ros - 12/09/2009 22:13 - United States

Spicy

Today, my wife and I were doing it when the phone rang. She answered it, and rode me while carrying on a more than a five minute conversation with her father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 781

You deserved it 4 380

My ears!

By epistaxis - 02/02/2009 00:43 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I'm staying with my grandmother and overheard her having phone sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 421

You deserved it 2 688

By anonymous - 21/02/2011 05:01

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend called me and asked me if I wanted to have phone sex with her. We got into it. It took us 13 minutes to figure out my mom had been on the other line the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 990

You deserved it 14 931

By ambled - 24/12/2011 20:04 - United States

Today, I had to share a car with my dad and stepmother. My stepmother managed to get hammered at lunch and spent the hour-long car trip drunkenly mistaking the heating controls for the radio. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 579

You deserved it 2 339

By messyfamily - 19/09/2010 07:31 - Australia

Today, I had to listen to my mother flirting on the phone with my dad's new girlfriend's ex-husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 726

You deserved it 2 856

Make it stop, please

By Anonymous - 27/09/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I had to listen to my mom give a detailed description of her date last night to her friends via speakerphone... while I was trapped in the car with her. When I pointed out that I was still in the back seat, she scoffed and told me, "I have a sex life, deal with it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 451

You deserved it 125

Never trust the messenger

By Teamarie - 11/08/2009 15:21 - United States

Spicy

Today, as I was driving my dad home, I got a text message. My dad, who doesn't want me texting while I'm driving, decided to read the text message to me. He began to repeat a message from my boyfriend recounting the amazing sex we had the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 146

You deserved it 20 999

Great joke Dad, thanks

By Anonymous - 05/07/2014 17:53 - United States

Spicy

Today, my dad interrupted my job interview with a phone call, just to say, "I fucked your mom." No shit, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 894

You deserved it 7 910

By Anonymous - 22/05/2010 23:22 - United States

Spicy

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 586

You deserved it 47 219

Next

Top comments

ThogTheCaveman 7

Monday 4 April 2011 5:26

While it's driving? You're right, great idea. What could possibly go wrong with getting out of a moving car? Dear God, are you trying to destroy my faith in humanity?

denvan 0

Sunday 3 April 2011 22:41

Wow your face must've been a Kodak moment.

Comments

moosemammoth 5

Sunday 3 April 2011 23:00

Speaker phone anyone ;)

Every1luvsfmls 6

Sunday 3 April 2011 23:08

ydi for making her horny

polysyllabist 3

Sunday 3 April 2011 23:03

^ exactly, or a one line "what are you wearing" without the context of hearing the dad first say "heading over to Bob's birthday party, meet you there?"

99zeus99 0

Sunday 3 April 2011 23:04

r u sure it was ur dad? maybe it was paco the pool guy

FeelinFine 1

Sunday 3 April 2011 23:14

Dealing with this scenario takes a lot of sensivity. 1. Open the door on her side. 2. Kick her out of the car. 3. Drive away. 4. Tell your dad that she's a bitch and you were picking her up from one of her lovers.

tnlander 20

Sunday 3 April 2011 23:07

phone sex threesome?

WOGBRO 6

Sunday 3 April 2011 23:08

I hear a threesome coming along.

RaVeN53 7

Sunday 3 April 2011 23:16

That's nasty n disrespectful! I would have turned the music up as loud as it can go to drown that out!

nikki9tails 3

Monday 4 April 2011 3:24

good idea

DeadxManxWalking 27

Sunday 3 April 2011 23:20

who was at the wheel? o.o don't want an orgasming woman at the wheel

goza27 0

Sunday 3 April 2011 23:26

lmao @ 11. genius.

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I agree, your life sucks 15 540

You deserved it 51 165

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I agree, your life sucks 431

You deserved it 131

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 527

You deserved it 1 020

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I agree, your life sucks 25 133

You deserved it 7 231

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I agree, your life sucks 39 172

You deserved it 2 606

Today, I politely asked our overweight neighbour to park on her side of the garage. Three unsuccessful tries later, she drives out and parks on the street in a huff, and I'm now the world's biggest bastard because she can't legally park on her side and still open her door due to her size. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 433

You deserved it 747

Today, I started lessons on snowboarding. As soon as I got to the top of the hill, my instructor pushed me saying, "Just believe, it'll come to you!" He said this just before I hit a tree, breaking my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 398

You deserved it 3 435

Today, I confronted my boss to find out why I was denied a promotion that she promised to me. Her response? "You should know by now I'm a liar. Not my fault if you believe the things I say." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 541

You deserved it 3 671