Health and Work: This good enough for ya?

This good enough for ya?

By pukishgirl - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - India

Today, my boss was skeptical when I told her I had a terrible migraine and needed to go home for the day early. I removed all her doubts by puking over her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 819

You deserved it 2 957

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 21/04/2015 15:40 - United States - Ann Arbor

Today, despite having a stomach bug, I went into work, as my boss is overseas and had warned me not to take any sick leave until she returned. After 4 hours and vomiting twice, I left. She found out and sent me an email bitching me out for coming in sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 372

You deserved it 2 932

By StupidJob - 01/09/2016 23:23 - United States - Batavia

Today I was home sick from work because my doctor gave me a new pill that made me throw up violently. My boss called. I thought she was checking on me. She fired me instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 906

You deserved it 858

Buckethead

By hi! - 17/09/2021 14:00

Today, I called in sick for the first time. My boss said that if I didn’t show up, not only would he fire me, but he’d make sure I never find another job for the rest of my life. So I showed up to work with a bucket, puking every five minutes. My boss still made me stay the full nine hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 806

You deserved it 141

Best time

By Username - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, my boss told me that I'd confessed my love to him last night when he'd held my hair back as I puked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 892

You deserved it 35 438

By Mark - 27/02/2015 18:24 - Malta - Naxxar

Today, I was feeling terrible so I called in sick to work. My boss refused to believe me and told me he'd fire me if I didn't come in. I dragged myself to work, only to spend most of the day glued to the toilet. Now he says I won't be paid for the day because I barely did any work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 867

You deserved it 2 719

Not a morning person

By Anonymous - 30/01/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, I was forced to come in to work early in the morning. For me, that means I will have a pounding migraine, vomiting, and diarrhea for at least the next two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 408

You deserved it 280

By Anonymous - 06/06/2015 04:20 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I have food poisoning. My boss told me that if I didn't come into work, I'd be fired. Not 30 minutes after sitting down, I sneezed and shat my pants. My boss still won't let me leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 929

You deserved it 2 190

By Anonymous - 21/06/2013 04:44 - United States - Vancouver

Today, my boss held my hair while I threw up. It's day two on the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 125

You deserved it 9 051

About that raise…

By onlyolivia - 05/10/2016 14:43 - United States - Elkridge

Today, I finally got the courage to ask my boss why the flowers I got her for her birthday the other day were in the conference room and not her office. She told me she was allergic to them and she had such a bad reaction that it made her go home early. I made my boss sick on her birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 951

You deserved it 1 353

Asshat

By Anonymous - 04/05/2023 06:00 - United States

Today, I woke up with a sore throat and a stuffy nose. As my boss is an asshat who hates allowing sick leave, I thought I could power through it, but halfway through my workday I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. I had to go home early and now I can't move without pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 828

You deserved it 143

ChubEchaser 0

Thursday 18 November 2010 16:16

way to back it up. FHL

DakotaCat 4

Thursday 18 November 2010 16:21

In the words of Cleveland Brown "that's nasty:

Comments

emjay09 0

Friday 19 November 2010 7:29

FHL!

secretvampire13 0

Friday 19 November 2010 7:54

lol ur boss deserved it!

AngieVengeance 0

Friday 19 November 2010 9:14

whoever just said that they never complained on FML about getting sick all the time....YOU JUST DID!

GavinRoskamp 0

Friday 19 November 2010 10:13

Bahaha, good observation.

hcysntmf 0

Friday 19 November 2010 10:15

Oh how I love fml. This is so appropriate to my day yesterday, but ok, I only fainted on my boss but it was embarrassing as hell!

Marjojo_fml 0

Friday 19 November 2010 11:19

Sorry, but what does it means "puk over" ? I'm french and this word isn't in dictionnary. I ask me why...

Zebidee 8

Friday 19 November 2010 13:37

Puke = dégueuler

Marjojo_fml 0

Friday 19 November 2010 14:24

Merci c'est bien ce que j'avais compris.

Zebidee 8

Friday 19 November 2010 22:32

Pas de problème.

fmvhero 0

Saturday 20 November 2010 6:08

bitch deserved it imo. You should be posting this on MLIA

drummerchic14 0

Saturday 20 November 2010 7:04

good job, that'll teach that bitch to doubt u:)

jkweenjkwrntjkrw 0

Sunday 21 November 2010 21:24

FHL. At least she knows your not a liar

Jasper8713 2

Monday 22 November 2010 3:17

per month, my bad.

Djosef_fml 0

Sunday 28 November 2010 9:26

OP, the real question is : Does you wife see a therapist for her trust issues while you sleep with the nanny?

Keywords

Cute Love Surprise Texting My ex Awkward Wanker Intimacy Sex Sleep Health Insomnia Mental health Cooking Food Kids Weekend Parents Miscellaneous Annoying Pranks Embarrassing Work Technology Coworkers Zoom Roommate Argument Cats Animals

The Top

Today, I woke up in a complete daze. It took me a few minutes to realize what had happened. Apparently my sleepwalking problems have returned, only this time I managed to overdose myself with Nyquil. As a result, I slept for fourteen hours, wet my sheets, and lost my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 871

You deserved it 4 120

Today, I learned that my insecurities regarding my dick size were unfounded, as my girlfriend gushed over my dick and said it was amazing. We then got down to business, and almost immediately heard, "Ow! Fuck, that's my cervix! This hurts! Stop!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 1 209

The Top

Today, I was having hot sex with my boyfriend. Then, I felt a puff of air hit my face and a rancid smell. My dog had farted in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 723

You deserved it 702

Today, I’m now so unfit, I had to stop halfway through sex with my wife to catch my breath, and in the end we just gave up, as clearly neither of us was having an orgasm today. I don’t get it, I weigh exactly 11 stone and exercise regularly, but I have no stamina and shit lungs. I hate myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 255

You deserved it 342

Today, a basketball opponent ran into my elbow and hurt himself. He called me to the hospital and, to be a good person, I went to check on him. It turns out he reported me to the police to try and get money out of me. Now I'm stuck at the station while they “investigate”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 567

You deserved it 252

Today, I thought I heard a nasty storm brewing, even though there was no warning that one would occur. I then realized it was one of my cats, stuck behind a chair and trying to escape with little success. Yes, her escape attempts were that noisy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 569

You deserved it 162

Today, and throughout the past week, my electricity, water, cable, and Internet were progressively shut off. Why? Because my deranged mother-in-law has been stealing the money orders I use to pay my bills out of my mailbox. She also stole the late notices because she didn't want me to be "mad". FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 948

You deserved it 3 411

Today, while working at Starbucks, an elderly woman came up to me asking to turn up the heat. It was at 73. After explaining to her that corporate all the way across the country controls our heat, she's reporting me to corporate and is insisting I should be fired or she won't ever return. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 294

You deserved it 367