Intimacy: TMI

TMI

By Anonymous - 24/01/2012 10:39 - Australia

Today, I played Call Of Duty online against someone who turned out to be wanking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 217

You deserved it 7 587

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Same thing different taste

Heated gaming moment

By Anonymous - 26/11/2014 19:41 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 132

You deserved it 6 806

By Noname - 16/02/2009 00:33 - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job, he was twitching and moving around and saying "oh yeah" then he said "take that bitch". I looked up to see he was only excited about how he is domination in Call of Duty 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 044

You deserved it 10 598

How could you?

By Anonymous - 16/08/2022 16:00

Today, my girlfriend punched me in the back of the neck because I was talking to a woman online. It was a public Call Of Duty match, I have no control over who I play with, plus I wasn’t even talking specifically to whoever this woman was, just to the people in general like all COD players. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 044

You deserved it 176

By jinxofsocal - 21/06/2009 04:16 - United States

Today, was my boyfriend's birthday. He wanted a blowjob while playing Call of Duty 4. In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller down when he died. Into my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 401

You deserved it 27 536

By Laughluv - 02/01/2010 06:17 - United States

Today, I realized that I have been playing a little too much Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. I realized this when I was watching a youtube video and there was someone walking in the background who I impulsively tried to gun down and kill by moving my mouse over him and clicking repeatedly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 809

You deserved it 36 853

By Anonymous - 21/03/2009 07:18 - Canada

Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 353

You deserved it 13 296

Gamer girl woes

By justanothergamergirl - 17/04/2019 20:00

Today, and for the past two weeks, I decided to try online gaming, as it's something I've never done before. I already have a creep stalking me because I mentioned I was single and he's a horny virgin. Remind me never to talk about my lack of love life online again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 827

You deserved it 1 184

By JJ - 03/10/2015 07:42 - United States - Irwin

Today, I was savagely beating my wife on Call of Duty, since she demanded that I play normally and not hold back. 15 minutes later, she was raging at me, calling me a bastard and saying she wished we'd never married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 549

You deserved it 4 477

By The_Life - 12/10/2016 13:26 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I'm staying at my boyfriend's house and things were getting heated when he got a call from one of his mates wanting to play Counter Strike. Next thing I know, I'm laying in bed by myself listening to him rage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 060

You deserved it 1 282

Rolled

By shushingmoon - 18/09/2009 19:15 - United States

Today, I was in class, playing online poker and keeping up my winning record. I eventually got seated against a guy who beat me at every hand. I heard laughing behind me after I lost all my winnings. The guy behind me had just made an account, looked over my shoulder, and won all my money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 951

You deserved it 53 663

JRFaceless 8

Tuesday 24 January 2012 15:52

And this is different than playing CoD any other time?

Magic_Mushroom 7

Tuesday 24 January 2012 15:52

Idk that sounds like fun to me

Comments

Rocky007 15

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:56

I'll let you in on a little secret. This is probably not the first time this has happened to you. It's just the first time you knew.

QOD 0

Wednesday 25 January 2012 6:11

Very good logic got me thinking about Alot of past games.

OfficeNinja 5

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:06

Sounds like you had the advantage, with your opponent only playing with one hand.

kjb1234 5

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:10

On what system is there enough hands to do that?

TheJashinist 8

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:15

This happens to me nearly every night. It's scary.

XxYingYangxX 1

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:29

I guess he had a call for another duty..

Bigboned38 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:29

Your full of crap attention ***** stop making stupid stuff up to get attention, you can't play cod and wank at the same time it's not possible

onanymouse 1

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:40

Mad multitasking skills if you ask me!

cBlackout 13

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:41

Call of Duty: Wack ops

xcdog16 0

Wednesday 25 January 2012 4:55

It's call of duty wank ops

p3mguin 7

Monday 30 July 2012 23:47

No it's call of duty wack offs

mama2b3 20

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:41

Who won?

rvb15 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:42

Didn't know ten year olds knew what wanking was yet

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The Top

It's great to see you ! How was july ? Hot, sweaty, flirty ? How I miseed talking to you (and getting one or two comments if we're lucky enough). But let's not complain, a whole month welcoming artists for their second rounds who gave us brand new il...

I agree, your life sucks 11

You deserved it 13

Today, I found out my seven-year-old nephew has worked out my phone’s passcode, which admittedly is pretty basic. He also knows how to send texts. How did I find out? By receiving a reply to the message he sent my boss that said, “Your stinky, you suck, big boobie.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 381

You deserved it 126

The Top

Today, my cousin texted me, asking how the chicken pizza had settled in my stomach. We got drunk last night and had pizza. I thought it was cheese; it was chicken. I've been vegetarian for 7 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 611

You deserved it 48 829

Today, I was grooming one of my horses, when she stepped on my foot. I yelled and frantically tried to push her away. She turned her head toward me and shifted the rest of her weight onto my foot. I'm in the hospital now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 483

You deserved it 2 709

Today, after my old downstairs neighbor, who would come upstairs to bang on my door and yell at me every time she heard a sound from me at all times of the day, had finally moved out, it became clear that my new downstairs neighbor gets drunk and yells at the TV in the early hours of the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 780

You deserved it 2 149

Today, my wife and I were planning our nursery for our future child. She said that we'd be painting it pink either way. I asked what would happen if we had a boy. She said "Oh, he'll be gay" with a menacing glare. I'm worried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 939

You deserved it 7 128

Today, I went on an a date with a guy I met online. We were waiting in line at Starbucks when he turned to me and said, "Do you want anything?" Just before I was about to answer, he practically shoved in front of me and paid for himself. The cashier looked more horrified than I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 365

You deserved it 503

Today, my mother taught my 98-year-old great-uncle to knock on the wall if he needs us. He can't remember who we are, but every hour he can remember to knock to ask, "Is it breakfast yet?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 819

You deserved it 4 148

TMI