Intimacy: TMI - FML

TMI

By Anonymous - 24/01/2012 10:39 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I played Call Of Duty online against someone who turned out to be wanking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 221

You deserved it 7 589

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

Heated gaming moment

By Anonymous - 26/11/2014 19:41 - United States - Los Angeles

Spicy

Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 141

You deserved it 6 810

By Noname - 16/02/2009 00:33 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job, he was twitching and moving around and saying "oh yeah" then he said "take that bitch". I looked up to see he was only excited about how he is domination in Call of Duty 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 047

You deserved it 10 600

How could you?

By Anonymous - 16/08/2022 16:00

Today, my girlfriend punched me in the back of the neck because I was talking to a woman online. It was a public Call Of Duty match, I have no control over who I play with, plus I wasn’t even talking specifically to whoever this woman was, just to the people in general like all COD players. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 046

You deserved it 177

By jinxofsocal - 21/06/2009 04:16 - United States

Spicy

Today, was my boyfriend's birthday. He wanted a blowjob while playing Call of Duty 4. In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller down when he died. Into my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 405

You deserved it 27 538

By Laughluv - 02/01/2010 06:17 - United States

Today, I realized that I have been playing a little too much Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. I realized this when I was watching a youtube video and there was someone walking in the background who I impulsively tried to gun down and kill by moving my mouse over him and clicking repeatedly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 809

You deserved it 36 854

By Anonymous - 21/03/2009 07:18 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 362

You deserved it 13 301

Gamer girl woes

By justanothergamergirl - 17/04/2019 20:00

Today, and for the past two weeks, I decided to try online gaming, as it's something I've never done before. I already have a creep stalking me because I mentioned I was single and he's a horny virgin. Remind me never to talk about my lack of love life online again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 829

You deserved it 1 184

By JJ - 03/10/2015 07:42 - United States - Irwin

Today, I was savagely beating my wife on Call of Duty, since she demanded that I play normally and not hold back. 15 minutes later, she was raging at me, calling me a bastard and saying she wished we'd never married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 552

You deserved it 4 478

By The_Life - 12/10/2016 13:26 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I'm staying at my boyfriend's house and things were getting heated when he got a call from one of his mates wanting to play Counter Strike. Next thing I know, I'm laying in bed by myself listening to him rage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 063

You deserved it 1 282

Rolled

By shushingmoon - 18/09/2009 19:15 - United States

Today, I was in class, playing online poker and keeping up my winning record. I eventually got seated against a guy who beat me at every hand. I heard laughing behind me after I lost all my winnings. The guy behind me had just made an account, looked over my shoulder, and won all my money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 951

You deserved it 53 671

Next

Top comments

JRFaceless 8

Tuesday 24 January 2012 15:52

And this is different than playing CoD any other time?

Magic_Mushroom 7

Tuesday 24 January 2012 15:52

Idk that sounds like fun to me

Comments

BrysGirl27 14

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:43

Hahah giggady

ImDB8 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:59

You lost huh?

zenrael 21

Tuesday 24 January 2012 18:08

Ohhh yeaaa........ Fyl indeed sir. This is stupid how is this an fml?!

irritatedone 5

Wednesday 25 January 2012 18:14

Dude ur cute :)

perdix 29

Tuesday 24 January 2012 18:20

Was this person beating you as badly as his meat?

bkkingkeokuk 1

Tuesday 24 January 2012 18:29

Dam did he win because thats beast mode

dogpup4 23

Tuesday 24 January 2012 18:33

Today, I played Call of Duty online. FML

perdix 29

Tuesday 24 January 2012 18:50

So how did your masturbating go? Did you make provisions for an easy clean-up or did you just let it shoot everywhere?

dogpup4 23

Tuesday 24 January 2012 23:14

I usually roll my shirt up.

sertyla 1

Wednesday 25 January 2012 5:08

Exactly

perdix 29

Tuesday 24 January 2012 18:34

This sounds like a modern variation of when one guy would defiantly say to another, "I can beat you with one hand tied behind my back." Definitely defiantly ;)

bornoriginal 3

Tuesday 24 January 2012 18:43

Oh, that was me..

ExToRtiOn 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 19:13

I do that every time I get a MOAB

dragonlord354 4

Tuesday 24 January 2012 19:14

Well, why didn't you shoot him while he was shooting the sock?

dragonlord354 4

Wednesday 25 January 2012 6:56

Njjj

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Family Cats DIY Poopoo peepee Work Awkward Management Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Frustration Transportation ADHD Dogs Animals Dating Love Mental health Health Anxiety Technology Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, I had to pick up my brother and his girlfriend from the bar at 2:00am because they were too drunk to drive themselves and had no money for an Uber. Five minutes into the ride, they started going at it in the back of my car. I don't think I'll be doing favors again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 655

You deserved it 532

Today, it's only day three of my annual vacation. Rest and relaxation? Afraid not! For the past days, I've been haunted by the constant thought of how much work will be piled up when I get back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 137

The Top

Today, I picked my dog up and nibbled her ear. On the tip of her ear was a large tick, which burst, sending blood into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 570

You deserved it 3 826

Today, I asked my husband to borrow his phone, since mine had died. His response was, “Well, you have a charger, use it.” When I reminded him that we weren’t at home, he screamed at me in front of everyone at the store, “I’m not letting you go through my phone and that’s final!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 428

You deserved it 200

Today, my friend drove up a parking lot and I unbuckled my seatbelt as soon as we were parked. He then suddenly saw a better spot right in front and moved his car. When I got out, a police officer approached me, saying I wasn't wearing my seatbelt. I was fined for that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 939

You deserved it 5 023

Today, when my husband got home from work, I was standing in the kitchen, wearing nothing but stilletos. He asked me to make him hot chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 196

You deserved it 6 630

Today, I told my mom I wanted to see a doctor, because I feel like I’m slipping into depression. I told her I was so sad, I didn’t shower for 4 days. Her response? “I don’t believe that. You’ve always had great hygiene!” Duh, I’m not myself lately! Thanks for noticing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 032

You deserved it 153

Today, I was walking down the strip with a friend when we saw a homeless man with no arm. I felt bad, so I gave him some cash and I looked into his poor little eyes when he put out his arm for a hug. Without thinking, I hugged him. Right as I was thinking, "WTF am I doing?" he kissed my boob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 672

You deserved it 53 191