Intimacy: TMI

TMI

By Anonymous - 24/01/2012 10:39 - Australia

Today, I played Call Of Duty online against someone who turned out to be wanking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 221

You deserved it 7 589

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Same thing different taste

Heated gaming moment

By Anonymous - 26/11/2014 19:41 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 141

You deserved it 6 810

By Noname - 16/02/2009 00:33 - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job, he was twitching and moving around and saying "oh yeah" then he said "take that bitch". I looked up to see he was only excited about how he is domination in Call of Duty 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 047

You deserved it 10 600

How could you?

By Anonymous - 16/08/2022 16:00

Today, my girlfriend punched me in the back of the neck because I was talking to a woman online. It was a public Call Of Duty match, I have no control over who I play with, plus I wasn’t even talking specifically to whoever this woman was, just to the people in general like all COD players. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 046

You deserved it 177

By jinxofsocal - 21/06/2009 04:16 - United States

Today, was my boyfriend's birthday. He wanted a blowjob while playing Call of Duty 4. In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller down when he died. Into my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 405

You deserved it 27 538

By Laughluv - 02/01/2010 06:17 - United States

Today, I realized that I have been playing a little too much Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. I realized this when I was watching a youtube video and there was someone walking in the background who I impulsively tried to gun down and kill by moving my mouse over him and clicking repeatedly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 809

You deserved it 36 854

By Anonymous - 21/03/2009 07:18 - Canada

Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 362

You deserved it 13 301

Gamer girl woes

By justanothergamergirl - 17/04/2019 20:00

Today, and for the past two weeks, I decided to try online gaming, as it's something I've never done before. I already have a creep stalking me because I mentioned I was single and he's a horny virgin. Remind me never to talk about my lack of love life online again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 829

You deserved it 1 184

By JJ - 03/10/2015 07:42 - United States - Irwin

Today, I was savagely beating my wife on Call of Duty, since she demanded that I play normally and not hold back. 15 minutes later, she was raging at me, calling me a bastard and saying she wished we'd never married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 552

You deserved it 4 478

By The_Life - 12/10/2016 13:26 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I'm staying at my boyfriend's house and things were getting heated when he got a call from one of his mates wanting to play Counter Strike. Next thing I know, I'm laying in bed by myself listening to him rage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 063

You deserved it 1 282

Rolled

By shushingmoon - 18/09/2009 19:15 - United States

Today, I was in class, playing online poker and keeping up my winning record. I eventually got seated against a guy who beat me at every hand. I heard laughing behind me after I lost all my winnings. The guy behind me had just made an account, looked over my shoulder, and won all my money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 951

You deserved it 53 671

JRFaceless 8

Tuesday 24 January 2012 15:52

And this is different than playing CoD any other time?

Magic_Mushroom 7

Tuesday 24 January 2012 15:52

Idk that sounds like fun to me

Comments

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:12

This gives "playing with yourself" a whole new meaning.

TheFirstSamurai 18

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:36

Gives a whole new meaning to the word "foreplay" as well.

CrankDatAsss 4

Thursday 26 January 2012 0:01

hahaha nice one

DaKillaMafia 2

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:20

I've given up on Call of Duty

honeybadger123 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 18:02

fag

Random017 7

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:21

Is this an FYL because of the wanking or because you lost to the wanker?

kjb1234 5

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:13

Love Your profile pic

Iniguez01 4

Thursday 26 January 2012 6:21

I'm a sing the doom song

raphanne_fml 33

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:22

HEADSHOT!

LiyIa_fml 8

Tuesday 24 January 2012 19:46

Groin shot.

honeybadger123 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:23

well did you win at least?

FMLsince94 5

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:24

Thats half the people online that doesnt have a life

GoW_Chick 14

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:36

So with that logic that would mean half the people reading this are wanking off while doing so, that's, um, ....nice to know?

Awsumuzzie 12

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:47

Following up with GoW_chick, are we obligated to fulfill that statistic? If so, do we choose which side of the fence we fall in?

CryMoreFMLs 14

Tuesday 24 January 2012 23:49

56 - I don't know, but I fall on the fence. It's quite painful, it has barbed wire...

Isolaytore 3

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:25

YDI for playing Call of Duty.

L1v3_L0v3_Lau9h 18

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:48

36- CoD is awesome! I don't see how he deserves it.

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:11

Don't feed the troll.

L1v3_L0v3_Lau9h 18

Tuesday 24 January 2012 17:44

My bad :/

tylersign 11

Tuesday 24 January 2012 20:38

36- Yep, you know best. Happy now? *troll dead* Bye.

tylerbro 3

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:31

Did you win?

zingline89 18

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:31

People need to stop playing this game every wanking moment.

Jewnut 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:35

Was he any good? Mad multi-tasking skills

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I had awesome sex with my ex. Again. I broke up with her a few weeks ago as she admittedly hadn't been attracted to me anymore in a long time. Now she says that after we broke up she doesn't feel any pressure anymore, and can enjoy sex with me again like she did before she moved in with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 199

Today, I was on my way home from a friend's house. I called home ahead of time to let my parents know I was on my way. My dad picked up and in a panting voice said, "Now isn't a good time, drive around the block for 15 minutes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 104 074

You deserved it 6 726

The Top

Today, I was chatting with a cute guy on Omegle. He seemed really friendly and interested after I had showed him a picture of me. When I mentioned that I play music, he seemed even more interested, so I gave him the link to my music Myspace. I waited patiently. He disconnected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 613

You deserved it 26 149

Today, my granny died. My aunt wants to throw away all her books and furniture. When I offered to take care of selling it, or giving it away, like granny would have wanted, my aunt said she would let me "keep a percentage" of the few bucks I’d get for my troubles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 626

You deserved it 139

Today, my wife hit a new level of clingy when she picked the lock on the bathroom door so she could sit with me while I shat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 567

You deserved it 77

Today, I tried to train my cat to scratch the scratching post by giving her a treat every time she used it, but she took that as getting a treat every time she scratched something. Now, not only does she scratch all my furniture, but she also meows for a treat while doing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 323

You deserved it 4 867

Today, I installed high performance brakes on my car after fearing that my old brake system was to weak and I could get into a crash. On the test drive a car in front of me stopped short. My new brakes worked, the ones on the car behind me didn't. I now have whiplash and a totalled car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 530

You deserved it 3 543

Today, my best friend confessed to having feelings for me. I've been in love with her for a long time, so I was ecstatic. She doesn't see herself ever going out with me, though, because she's a couple of inches taller and can't imagine herself "towering" over her man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 902

You deserved it 2 954

TMI