Work: Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have...

By Anonymous - 11/02/2013 15:26 - United States - Mansfield

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 939

You deserved it 30 150

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Stolen valor

By Anonymous - 09/04/2020 08:00

Today, I was on Facebook when I saw a picture a popular girl I don't talk to had posted of her fake ID. She had used my full name and identical signature. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 858

You deserved it 125

By Anonymous - 01/07/2013 17:49 - Canada - Coquitlam

Today, I saw my former high school teacher at the mall. After a nice conversation, she mentioned that I "still dress like a slut." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 854

You deserved it 21 372

By Mr. Shawzy - 14/01/2009 13:09 - Canada

Today, the ugliest girl in school walked by me and said "ewwww". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 443

You deserved it 9 222

By notattractiveatall - 15/10/2012 22:09 - Australia - Newcastle

Today, two girls came up to me on the street and asked if they could take a photo with me for their high school scavenger hunt, because they needed a picture with a stranger. One of the girls shook her head and said to the other, "It needs to be an attractive stranger" and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 778

You deserved it 1 776

Caught in the act

By Anonymous - 14/01/2010 05:10 - United States

Today, I was on the computer in the library on campus. I was Facebook-stalking a really cute girl that I often see on campus. As I'm looking at her profile pictures, I turn around and the girl is standing right behind me. She gave me a disgusted look and walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 579

You deserved it 44 862

Nice try

By idiotwithaface - 23/09/2010 14:17 - United States

Today, I recently graduated from high school and I went to a college party. I met these girls and told them I graduated college already, to sound cool. I then heard one of them say, "I went to middle school with you, and I was in your math class." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 522

You deserved it 62 014

By Ugly - 22/08/2013 23:40 - United States - Jerseyville

Today, I went to my high school reunion. Someone walked up to me and said, "Wow, you look so different!" She then followed it up with, "You used to be so pretty, what happened?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 190

You deserved it 3 514

By Anonymous - 29/12/2010 16:30 - Sweden

Today, I saw a girl on the subway that I knew so I started waving frantically. She gave me a really weird expression and moved quickly away from me. Then I realised that I only knew her because I had stalked her Facebook once. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 901

You deserved it 54 248

Pissed to meet you

By Anonymous - 09/08/2015 01:23 - United States

Today, at Walmart, a lady came up to me and informed me that I "look like the kinda skank that'd give it up on the first date". FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 539

You deserved it 3 173

By Gaz47 - 27/07/2018 19:00

Today, I was online dating and a girl from high school messaged me. Thinking she might have matured since we're now in our 40's, I messaged back. She then said it was a joke and that I'm still a desperate, pathetic nerd trying to score with the hottest girl in class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 347

You deserved it 350

MathewBlack 14

Monday 11 February 2013 18:53

Apparently 'swag' gets you through medical school..

Jacksparrow72 21

Monday 11 February 2013 18:53

Wow, would you like ice for that burn?

Comments

SheTheOtaku 21

Wednesday 23 April 2014 5:52

I fear for our lives in America.

ZeusBeDubsteppin 24

Saturday 10 May 2014 23:09

swag and yolo need to ******* die out.

drfisk 3

Wednesday 21 May 2014 1:58

Well, she could have passed with the bare minimum in schooling. Any person who uses "swag" in that sense probably did favors to pass class.

ISlangWang 7

Friday 24 October 2014 4:55

Ugh I hate people who talk like this

GalaxyShots 21

Friday 28 November 2014 7:23

I feel bad for anyone she operates on.

fantasyworld 37

Monday 22 December 2014 18:30

I wouldn't want her operating on me honestly.

krispybacon4321 23

Wednesday 7 January 2015 3:33

And then you were like, "this is totally going on FML." lol. Fyl and YDI because you were assuming things.

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The Top

Today, I found out that the 2 loud "firework booms" I heard were actually a guy shooting his dog on the unfinished road behind my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 578

You deserved it 3 053

Today, my family got mad at me and called me a "selfish" for not moving to the same state they’re in while I was visiting, so they could be closer to my kid. We were living in the same house as them until two years ago, in my current state, until they decided to move with only a month's notice for me to find a new place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 63

The Top

Today, I tried channeling Mr. Miyagi by catching a fly with my bare hands. It turned out to be a wasp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 773

You deserved it 50 335

Today, I lied at a store when the checkout person told me the cologne I was buying was for men. I told him it was for my boyfriend. I haven't had a boyfriend in 2 years, I just wanted it to smell like one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 415

You deserved it 421

Today, I went to see "Black Swan" with my parents, not realizing that it was basically a porno. So I sat next to my dad while Mila Kunis and Natalie Portman had passionate lesbian sex on a twenty foot screen. And I'm pretty sure I heard the old guy behind us jacking off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 877

You deserved it 7 163

Today, I found out my son is getting bullied. His stepdad doesn’t care, in fact he’s all for bullying because he thinks it will force my son to stop being smart, or "a dork" as he calls him, and fit in with the normal kids for a change. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 311

You deserved it 210

Today, I was trying to go for number 2 while drying my hair so that my boy friend won't hear me do it. The lock on the door was broken, and he saw how good I am at multitasking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 206

You deserved it 2 728

Today, I found out first-hand that the most horrifying sight you can ever witness is two morbidly obese people getting nasty with each other in a dance club's run-down, public restroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 061

You deserved it 5 568