Health: Today, a girl was making fun of me for being a virgin and, "never... - FML

By uhoh.. - 22/03/2015 19:51 - Canada - Nanaimo

Today, a girl was making fun of me for being a virgin and, "never seeing a nipple". I have three. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 421

You deserved it 3 015

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Same thing different taste

By oliverP123 - 22/07/2011 04:11 - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom and her friends comparing the differences in their nipples. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 452

You deserved it 4 233

Body modification

By Anonymous - 22/04/2022 14:00

Today, I got a nipple piercing. My girlfriend thought I was pranking her with a fake piercing, because I wouldn’t be "daft enough" to get a real one, and she yanked it off, or rather through, my nipple. Yes, it cut my poor nip in half, and I now have two nipples where once I had only one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 089

You deserved it 360

By Anonymous - 23/07/2011 23:53 - United States

Today, my constant bragging to friends caught up with me, and everyone believes I'm a swinger. Because of this, no girl wants to go out with me, in case they become just another notch under my belt. The truth is, I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 949

You deserved it 99 330

DELETE! ABORT MISSION!

By Anonymous - 05/04/2022 12:00

Today, I made a TikTok video in which you could clearly but accidentally see my nipples through my shirt. You can imagine some of the comments I've started getting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 346

You deserved it 1 142

By triplenipple - 10/01/2011 20:35 - Sweden

Today, I realized the birthmark I have on my chest isn't a birthmark at all; it's a third nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 828

You deserved it 4 557

By Mondo - 20/11/2009 00:41 - United States

Today, an old lady on the street told me that I should be wearing a bra because my nipples were visible under my white tee. I am a 37-year-old man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 056

You deserved it 5 975

By Myorafield - 26/10/2016 06:42 - Australia - Glenwood

Today, my sister made a comment about my small boobs. I told her I'm actually a C cup, and she told me she "can't even C them". I just got roasted with a fucking pun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 705

You deserved it 1 332

Observational comedy

By Anonymous - 17/09/2020 22:59

Today, I, an insecure high school student, told my 11-year-old sister that I got my period in third grade. She responded with, “What?! Then how come you didn’t have tits until last year?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 060

You deserved it 193

By selfesteemboost - 27/01/2012 17:14 - Belize

Today, one of my dorm-mates started laughing at a bra hanging to dry in our bathroom. She thought it was hilarious that a college student would still have "such small, baby tits." It was my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 107

You deserved it 3 128

By lalala_hahaha - 23/09/2010 23:18 - France

Today, I had some girlfriends over, while my parents were having a party at our house. My drunken dad decided to come down to the basement and show us all his third nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 944

You deserved it 3 075

Next

Top comments

xxNIGHTxx_fml 17

Monday 23 March 2015 8:33

It's sad that being a virgin is seen as a bad thing.

corporatescoundr 25

Monday 23 March 2015 8:30

Hey... Nothing wrong with being a virgin. Or having extra nipples...

Comments

kerstileann 26

Monday 23 March 2015 13:40

i have 3 nipples myself, i was called nippi longstocking.

ninjamadi 16

Monday 23 March 2015 13:41

are you Chandler Bing? anyone? no? ok...

Blackhawk706 23

Monday 23 March 2015 14:13

**** Her

RandomUsername88 24

Monday 23 March 2015 14:18

Chandler Bing??

RebeccaRFT 18

Monday 23 March 2015 14:31

Being a virgin is way more respectable than sleeping with multiple people.

KobeLebroJordan 17

Monday 23 March 2015 15:07

What does you being a virgin have to do with your third nipple?

KobeLebroJordan 17

Monday 23 March 2015 15:13

Well, I get the whole never seeing a nipple thing, but what point does having a third make?

Attacksloth 33

Monday 23 March 2015 15:14

It's kind of odd how the taboo used to be premarital sex, and now it's virginity. I'm not criticizing either, because both are reflective of the intolerance of society. Why can't people just respect others' lifestyles?

PurpleMyth 28

Monday 23 March 2015 15:36

One in thirty people have an extra nipple. So you probably aren't the only one at your school that has one.

wildgenius 13

Monday 23 March 2015 15:53

Did we ask?

mattrd_fml 31

Monday 23 March 2015 15:54

"that's a terrible word! ...nipple."

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Today, I wrote a submission to FML and I realized that I could be doing so much more with my life than this. I mean really, I have real life stuff to deal with, and I don't have the time to be reading these s*itposts, much less making my own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77

You deserved it 514

Today, I demanded to know why my boyfriend takes so long in public toilets. He admitted his ex was such a nasty ho, she would drag him into public toilets whenever she wanted dick in public. So now every time he goes in one, he gets a boner and has to "get rid of it" before he can come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 137

You deserved it 350

The Top

Today, my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any monsters under his bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 360

You deserved it 7 502

Today, I witnessed my karate instructor whimper and practically piss himself as a guy walked up to him in the street and demanded his wallet. What a total waste of hundreds of dollars' worth of lessons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 081

You deserved it 4 553

Today, I was in my room and I drew a Harry Potter lightning bolt on my forehead in eyeliner because it cheers me up. Then some friends came over, so we went out to get yogurt, and when I got back I realized the lightning bolt was still there. I'm in college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 433

You deserved it 74 712

Today, while in a public restroom I could hear a guy having his way with his hand. He was quoting verses from the bible. I was in a cubicle and he was at the urinal. I was too frightened to leave. This went on for a very long time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 746

You deserved it 3 570

Today, after watching an episode of New Girl, my boyfriend became obsessed with the "Cotton-eyed Joe" song. He won't stop playing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 446

You deserved it 4 672

Today, I learned from my father that all I had to do was eat right and exercise and I would be bipolar free. Gee, why hadn't I thought of that yet? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 724

You deserved it 190