Money: Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate... - FML

By Anonymous - 13/11/2012 11:34 - United States - Macungie

Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 993

You deserved it 4 347

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By groom - 12/12/2008 02:30 - France

Today, I cut my nice and tasty home-made sandwich in half to give to a homeless man. He tasted it, pulled an unimpressed face, and then stuck it in his pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 498

You deserved it 3 152

By :| - 16/04/2011 02:04 - Canada

Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 645

You deserved it 6 377

By Michelle C - 26/01/2009 03:44 - United States

Today, I saw a homeless man asking for money for food. Not wanting to give him money so he'd spend it on booze, I decided to buy him a full big mac meal from McDonalds. When I went to hand it to him, he quickly waved his hand, denying it saying, "Thanks but I'm a vegetarian". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 755

You deserved it 5 582

Crossed purposes

By katiebell - 04/10/2019 12:00

Today, while I was walking home, a homeless man saw me and didn't ask for change, but how much I charged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 431

You deserved it 243

By meesmees - 23/11/2013 10:48 - United States - Severna Park

Today, I ended up talking to a homeless man and bought him a meal. In return, he hugged me and groped my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 817

You deserved it 6 812

By oops - 19/04/2011 15:37 - United States

Today, as I was out walking, one homeless man sitting with two others asked me for something to eat. Trying to do a good deed, I bought the three men a bag of apples. They then fought viciously over them before the first man chased me for handing them to "the wrong one." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 205

You deserved it 4 514

Generous

By cAtaLanbLoOd - 24/10/2013 06:06 - France - Perpignan

Today, a homeless guy asked me for a cigarette. Knowing that I only had a couple left in my pack, I gave it to him. He opened it, took one out and thanked me profusely. A bit surprised, I went on my way. Oh yeah, that's right, the pack contained the money I'd withdrawn from an ATM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 128

You deserved it 51 640

By Anonymous - 12/11/2010 21:31 - United States

Today, I was outside, eating a sandwich, when I noticed a homeless man was standing in front of me. Upon making eye contact, he grabbed the rest of my sandwich and ran off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 907

You deserved it 5 024

By HaliMali - 22/02/2015 18:21 - United States - Hastings

Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 431

You deserved it 3 711

By Kev - 19/02/2009 23:42 - Canada

Today, I walked home from work when a woman asked me to come inside for a free meal. It was at a homeless shelter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 230

You deserved it 5 197

Next

Top comments

DooleyFTW 17

Tuesday 13 November 2012 18:49

Well he did warn you!

windfuelsfire 10

Tuesday 13 November 2012 18:50

Troll homeless man strikes again!

Comments

Locoluis 15

Wednesday 14 November 2012 18:51

Now that I read this... I'm not sure about the copyright status of submitted homework. Do you own all the copyright rights of a poem you wrote for school? Or those rights belong to the school? For example, 4.4 BSD Unix is © The Regents of the University of California.

Locoluis 15

Wednesday 14 November 2012 18:53

Oops... wrong link.

nmlutgen 11

Wednesday 14 November 2012 20:55

Give him some change too? Haha

AngelSpit 18

Wednesday 14 November 2012 21:06

Literalism win!

doglover100 28

Wednesday 14 November 2012 21:35

Better than alcohol.

HunterAlpha1 8

Thursday 15 November 2012 1:08

well, the way our economy is going, it won't be too long before our money has more nutritional value than monetary value.

HighlandShadows 48

Thursday 15 November 2012 3:37

Well... at least you know he wasn't lying to try and get booze money out of you...

andthepennydrops 6

Thursday 15 November 2012 22:23

well what did you think he was going to do with it?!

imperialtl 12

Friday 16 November 2012 6:34

I hear those bills are high in fibre.

moneyisaprobem 1

Friday 16 November 2012 18:22

hahaha that homeless is guy is a Boss.

jimbob_76592 5

Friday 16 November 2012 20:10

The one time you should've given change

6
7
8
9
10
11

Keywords

Awkward Friends Love Miscellaneous Cute Haircut Relatable Cars You're fired Work Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Am I overreacting? Intimacy Sex Management Poopoo peepee Capitalism Coworkers Frustration Animals ADHD Dogs Transportation Dating Health Anxiety

The Top

Today, my friends and I went out to dinner. Being short on cash, I suggested a game where we put our phones in the center of the table and first to check their phone had to pay the bill. Our conversation died out, and fearful of having an awkward silence, I checked my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 422

You deserved it 55 330

Today, I have been getting calls from a weird kid from my school asking for nudes. I asked how he got my number, then found out that my friends put my number on a pole at school that says, "Call Wendy for a good time, she has nice tits." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 746

You deserved it 3 568

The Top

Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend that said, "Since you started acting like a dick, you might as well dress like one." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 541

You deserved it 62 312

Today, my neighbor confessed to me that he was homophobic and regrets that his family doesn't know it. He spent fifteen minutes explaining how much he would hate to have a gay child. I spent two hours last night convincing his son that it was the right thing to tell his family he was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 263

You deserved it 5 694

Today, my boss brought us some small cakes from a recent trip to China. I opened mine and noticed a little foil packet wrapped with the cake, so I thought it was a powdered topping. I had a couple of bites before my coworker told me it was actually a desiccant to keep the cakes fresh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 725

You deserved it 3 687

Today, a very attractive girl moved in across the road from me. As I was leaving, I noticed she was looking out her window at me. I tried playing it cool, only to end up tripping over my own feet, hands in pocket, and faceplanting the hood of my dad's car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 102

You deserved it 20 256

Today, after getting my appendix taken out, we had to drive over five sets of railroad tracks. Then, my four year-old brother decided to punch me in the stomach because, "I took away his mommy for two days." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 094

You deserved it 3 332

Today, I kept getting out of bed because I was sure my daughter had pooped in her diaper. Every time, I found nothing. I finally figured out the foul smell was my husband's breath, when he leaned into kiss me goodnight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 303

You deserved it 2 589