Love: Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place....

By Med - 13/11/2012 12:02 - Netherlands - Groningen

Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 792

You deserved it 2 975

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Same thing different taste

By ihatelaura - 15/05/2010 23:47 - United States

Today, I had to clean my boyfriend's puke off of our bed. Last night he ditched me to go out partying, came home, threw up, and passed out. He thinks it's only fair I clean up today because he's "not feeling well". FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 155

You deserved it 5 629

My body, my choice

By Anonymous - 16/09/2020 15:01 - Canada - Red Deer

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to drink several shots of vodka after taking a pill that makes you sick when you drink. She puked all night and then blamed me for making her sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 393

You deserved it 160

By Anonymous - 13/11/2009 00:05 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was throwing a birthday party and got very drunk. She needed help getting to the bathroom so I picked her up and walked her to the toilet. Assuming she needed to throw up, she instead takes a huge, monstrous crap right in front of me. I can't look at her the same ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 455

You deserved it 8 862

Tasty

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 20:00

Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 787

You deserved it 297

Pleased to meet you

By Eww - 05/10/2014 17:48 - United States - Salem

Today, a girl puked on me. No warnings, nothing. She just threw up on me, then walked off like nothing even happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 054

You deserved it 3 146

By justafriend - 28/05/2017 00:00

Today, I went to a bar with a close friend. She got drunk and was feeling sick, so I carried her to my car to take her to her house. Some stranger accused me of drugging her and tackled me with her in my arms. She threw up on me, and he took off running without an apology. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 254

You deserved it 382

By drunk - 06/03/2010 07:38 - Australia

Today, I woke up on a friend's floor with a massive hangover after her party last night. My friend, who was next to me, barfed all over me. She then told me that while I was drunk last night, I made out with her dog as well as two of our other friend's boyfriends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 280

You deserved it 40 954

By TCRII - 19/01/2019 16:00

Today, my girlfriend came over, drank half a bottle of Jack Daniels and pissed in my sink. I broke up with her and went out with friends. I met a woman and brought her home to watch a movie. She drank a bottle of wine and puked on my couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 418

You deserved it 3 820

Gross, dude!

By Anonymous - 27/05/2010 02:30 - United States

Today, I picked up my 3 friends from a party. One of them drank too much and claimed she needed to throw up. I pulled over multiple times so she could. It didn't happen until we were right in front of her house and still inside my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 411

You deserved it 3 182

College life

By Anonymous - 01/11/2009 11:33 - Germany

Today, I arrived in my dorm at 3 am to find my roommate passed out and a nauseating stench. While I was gone, he got drunk and puked all over the walls, carpet, and both beds. His inebriated attempt to clean up the mess consisted of smearing his vomit everywhere with my shower robe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 993

You deserved it 2 363

capnbzarr 43

Tuesday 13 November 2012 18:52

I think this is your cue to break up with the crazy alcoholic.

coducks 5

Tuesday 13 November 2012 18:51

Call a cab?

Comments

lmbachman 23

Tuesday 13 November 2012 21:42

Sounds like it's time for an upgrade honey...

CaysonJon 11

Tuesday 13 November 2012 21:59

What I don't understand is if it really had been you that threw up why would she would throw you out..?

erinchick1 7

Tuesday 13 November 2012 22:06

Time to get rid of the crazy alcoholic bitch!

yeti37 16

Tuesday 13 November 2012 22:08

if you found a prosthetic leg on your way home, there is someone here at FML who is looking for it.

_charliebrown_ 3

Tuesday 13 November 2012 22:09

Dump her because she was drunk and made a throw up mistake. Right and the reason relationships don't last these days?

SoylentCandycorn 10

Wednesday 14 November 2012 1:37

Sending your drunk boyfriend/girlfriend on a 3 hour walk home at 4 in the morning? What could possibly go wrong? Damn kids, overreacting about everything...

saffy66 34

Tuesday 13 November 2012 22:49

Next time OP, convince her she's at your place & tell her she's welcome to leave. If she actually goes outside, wait ten seconds & call her inside: "it's about time you got back here, where have you been?" Tell her she was supposed to come straight back to clean up the puke she left. If she's drunk enough to forget she vomited, she may be drunk enough to fall for this. Hopefully though for both your sakes, this doesn't happen too often.