Intimacy: Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first...

By Mini-wanker - 18/10/2011 17:34 - United States

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 547

You deserved it 8 867

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 04/02/2013 17:17 - United States - Durham

Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 417

You deserved it 3 890

Absolute beginners

By dancerr2210 - 09/06/2010 04:01 - United States

Today, after making out with my boyfriend for the first time, it took me an hour to convince him he was still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 276

You deserved it 6 969

By baron - 01/06/2009 17:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 131 678

You deserved it 7 573

By Anonymous - 22/06/2013 07:31 - United States - Piedmont

Today, my girlfriend told me that she feels pregnant. I didn't believe her, given how recently we had sex for the first time, so I told her to take a test to make sure. She's very sure now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 833

You deserved it 51 370

Like a virgin

By chchboy - 22/05/2012 05:05 - United States

Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 153

You deserved it 7 122

By sadsexer23 - 16/02/2010 03:10 - United States

Today, I took my girlfriends virginity and had given it my all. When I had finished, sweating and tired, I looked down at her and smiled, obviously pleased with myself. She looked up at me and said, "Wait, was that it?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 829

You deserved it 6 737

By Anonymous - 17/01/2011 01:28 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. We are both virgins. After we kissed and I took down my pants, she screamed and said "That THING is going to break me." We never did it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 105

You deserved it 7 022

Let down

By anonymous - 21/06/2009 02:00 - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend's virginity. A few minutes in she remarked, "If this is what sex is normally like then I'm seriously disappointed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 231

You deserved it 17 261

By Nick - 08/07/2011 05:19 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for 3 years. She's pregnant. I'm a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 469

You deserved it 11 764

By Anonymous - 02/05/2015 02:22 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 014

You deserved it 4 134

idontknowyou123 0

Wednesday 19 October 2011 0:09

y u no big enough

Nosrebor 8

Wednesday 19 October 2011 0:09

Oh wow... Time to try again ;)

Comments

TeamKK 8

Sunday 23 October 2011 5:33

Damn!!

swe3tsam22 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 20:12

What's that's crazy

swe3tsam22 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 20:12

What's that's crazy

Skipper1439 1

Sunday 23 October 2011 21:46

only physically try again

ekhatch 0

Monday 24 October 2011 1:26

choad

realshittt 2

Monday 24 October 2011 8:38

It's possible she had a 'flexible hyemn"

lordEast 6

Monday 24 October 2011 11:59

Oh snap

Lucky78_fml 4

Tuesday 25 October 2011 2:11

Eenie Teenie Weenie!!

wopandproud 0

Wednesday 26 October 2011 10:02

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha pencil **nis

indieandi 0

Thursday 27 October 2011 7:51

Ouch

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my husband threw up in the shower after drinking almost a whole bottle of wine. The shower won't drain now. Happy Thanksgiving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 190

You deserved it 2 951

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head during the horror flick we were watching. Little did I know, my girlfriend isn't a big fan of horror films. It was during a sex scene that intensified the moment. The same sex scene from which emerged a sudden jump-scare. I now have bite marks on my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 865

You deserved it 62 131

The Top

Today, I finally bought a car, after saving up for a year. My dealer had told me it was a good buy, so I snapped it up then and there. On the way home, the rear axle practically fell out of the car due to frame rot. My dealer wants to buy the car back at half the price. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 080

You deserved it 30 275

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because he didn't trust himself not to cheat on me. What? FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 763

You deserved it 4 163

Today, I got stood up on a date. To add insult to injury, meeting up was her idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 965

You deserved it 96

Today, I came back to my appartment to find that I couldn't watch certain channels on my tv. When I called the tv company I found out my parents had put a 'parental block' on all my favorite channels. Im 22 and rent an appartment with my friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98 593

You deserved it 7 876

Today, my daughter actually asked me who Martin Luther king Jr was. This girl, this African American daughter of mine, with full access to the internet, who has completed a college education, doesn’t know who one of the most important black men in history is. I need to lie down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 758

You deserved it 997

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 112

You deserved it 41 514

Same thing different taste

Absolute beginners

Like a virgin

Let down

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