Miscellaneous: Today, after letting the painters working on my house know that...

FML for mobile
Free

By Well okay then - 09/10/2016 17:12 - United States - Palmdale

Today, after letting the painters working on my house know that they're more than welcome to use my restroom, I walked outside only to find three of them pissing in my garden. One even aimed for my tomatoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 348

You deserved it 773

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By layout - 05/06/2009 19:47 - United States

Today, while laying out, I kept feeling something misty, like a spray bottle. Curious as to what it was since it kept coming, I looked up, only to see the painters were peeing over the side of the house, and the heavy breeze was turning their piss into a refreshing mist for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 911

You deserved it 4 069

By anon - 23/03/2011 04:56

Today, I walked in on one of my housemates pissing in the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 737

You deserved it 3 936

Bad boy!

By Carrie - 23/02/2021 21:30

Today, I was enjoying my dinner by my patio window when I spotted a cat roaming through my backyard. As I observed it explore my yard, I also watched as it climbed onto, then took a piss on the freshly clean clothes I had left to dry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 892

You deserved it 142

Nuts

By dieders - 21/11/2016 06:34 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up and opened my curtains to see my gardener up a ladder in front of my window tending to the plants growing up the side of the wall. This would've been fine if his ballsack wasn't hanging out his shorts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 852

You deserved it 1 149

Can't hold it in anymore

By Anonymous - 28/05/2022 04:00 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, both toilets in my house were occupied, so I had to shit outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 767

You deserved it 186

By lizzy1843 - 26/01/2011 14:48 - United States

Today, my cat pissed in my zen garden. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 948

You deserved it 23 860

By Unluggee - 04/06/2009 10:38 - United Kingdom

Today, at a party, my three friends and I thought it would be fun to urinate in a jug. We dislike the neighbours, so decided to throw the contents of the jug over the fence into their garden. It hit a tree and splashed back. I ended up covered in our piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 960

You deserved it 188 788

By Falcon - 09/02/2012 06:42 - United States

Today, I had to pee in the kitchen sink because my bathroom is being completely revamped, and the only other toilet in the house is my parents'. They refuse to let anyone use it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 487

You deserved it 2 838

Caught short

By Anonymous - 13/11/2014 18:01 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was speeding home, bursting to take a crap. I pulled into my driveway and made it inside, before my wife told me the plumber was still working on our pipes. I ended up having to take a crap in my own backyard, behind a tree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 959

You deserved it 3 397

Dude, gross!

By juggalo2 - 17/04/2024 03:00 - United States - Troy

Today, I came out of the bathroom and caught my husband peeing against a tree in the backyard. I told him how disgusting that was. He said, "Fine. Back to peeing in the sink." FML

I agree, your life sucks 287

You deserved it 480

TheGamingGamer 28

Saturday 29 October 2016 3:15

Report them immediately. That's not ok, and you worked hard on your garden.

Justkidding100 41

Saturday 29 October 2016 3:03

serve them a special salad as a thank you.

Comments

MidnaLink 33

Saturday 29 October 2016 4:18

They would so be fired if it was me. I would make sure they never got recommended again!

thunderniron 22

Saturday 29 October 2016 4:43

That's fire their ass time.

wow2mylife 25

Saturday 29 October 2016 4:52

if it a company report them if not fire them

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 29 October 2016 4:52

I'd be so pissed off!

yerawizardlizzy 27

Saturday 29 October 2016 19:54

One comment is enough.

zeeba_neighba 10

Saturday 29 October 2016 5:08

This is why we wash our vegetables!

vandj8 9

Saturday 29 October 2016 5:36

Blissment 12

Saturday 29 October 2016 5:45

biohazard, sue.

samlovesham1234 9

Saturday 29 October 2016 8:06

Ewww! Take those tomatoes and throw them at those morons!!

914smv 18

Saturday 29 October 2016 8:09

I would not eat those tomatoes!!

killer_koopa 3

Saturday 29 October 2016 9:08

At least they're keeping the bunnies out

FML on Facebook

Keywords

DIY My ex Love Friends I need your advice Awkward Miscellaneous Delivery Annoying Scary Insulting Kids Parenting Clothes Racism Work Embarrassing Animals Frustration Cats Cute Health Vacation Farts Party Restaurants Weddings Weird Ecology Weather

The Top

Today, I was snowboarding when a skier cut me off, resulting in me colliding with a 12 year-old girl. The girl was totally fine, and I was alright except for a slight nose bleed. I apologized to the girl, then her mom hit me over the back with a ski pole as I snowboarded away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 622

You deserved it 3 786

Today, I was at the gym and I saw a really cute guy working out nearby. I tried to get his attention by taking off my shirt and smiling at him. When he walked over to me, instead of asking for my number, he just said "Can you please put that back on? Thanks". FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 986

You deserved it 57 789

The Top

Today, I went to see a play. I'm pregnant, so I always need to pee. At intermission, I ran to use the bathroom, but there was a really long line. I asked the woman in front of me if I could pass her. She responded, "You don't look pregnant!", and lectured me about lying while I peed my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 988

You deserved it 3 143

Today, for some reason my girlfriend wanted to have sex in the bathroom at a family funeral. I’m sure that’s a sin, I mean… we definitely did it, so sorry Nana, but now I feel all wrong about it and I’m pretty sure I’m going to hell one day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 389

You deserved it 1 589

Today, after getting off the phone with a girl I'm interested in, I parked on campus and ate my lunch in the car. As I was sitting there, she appeared out of nowhere and walked to her car. I was parked directly behind her car, sitting there like a creepy ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 748

You deserved it 9 287

Today, at work as a cashier, I was scanning cantaloupes. The man buying them then looked me straight in the eye and said, "Nice melons." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 713

You deserved it 4 955

Today, I overcame my stage fright and got up in front of a café audience with my acoustic guitar to sing a few of my songs. Some asshat kept yelling stuff like "NEEDS MORE COWBELL!" and "FREEBIRD!", which made me lose my nerve and flee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 693

You deserved it 4 557

Today, I attended my high school reunion and was feeling good about the gym progress I’d made. Looking fabulous, I was ready to relive my glory days when I got into a conversation with someone I didn’t recognize. He had to remind me that we were in the same chemistry class for two years. I had no idea who he was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 138

You deserved it 403