Miscellaneous: Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in...

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By Anonymous - 11/01/2014 02:25 - United States

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 986

You deserved it 9 616

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Same thing different taste

I'm lovin' it

By Anonymous - 23/08/2020 17:09

Today, as usual, I worked at McDonald's. Although I tried to diffuse the situation, an old man was absolutely furious, and punched me in the face over BBQ sauce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 552

You deserved it 134

By Anonymous - 21/07/2013 04:15 - United States

Today, I was working the drive-through at McDonald's. I greeted a customer with a, "Hi, how are you doing today?" His response: "Better than you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 300

You deserved it 8 406

By stifledbyyou - 12/12/2010 00:06 - United States

Today, while I was working at McDonald's, a man and his wife ordered a Sundae. I gave the guy his sundae and realized I'd forgotten something. I said, "One second sir. Let me grab your nuts." I realized what I said when his wife gave me the death glare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 330

You deserved it 8 394

By Anonymous - 15/01/2013 20:56 - Finland - Helsinki

Today, after a long, horrible day at work and some fighting with my family and my girlfriend, I decided to cheer myself up by going to McDonald's for a change. I burst into tears when the cashier told me they couldn't make me a Mars McFlurry because they'd run out of ingredients. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 957

You deserved it 8 598

God's gift

By Anonymous - 24/01/2025 15:00 - United States - Newark

Today, I tried to flirt with the cute cashier at my usual drive-thru. Instead of saying, "Thank you," I panicked and said, "I love you." Now I have to find a new favorite burger place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 167

You deserved it 397

By myownperson - 25/10/2011 08:17 - United States

Today, I ordered food at McDonald's. I'm on crutches, and a guy offered to carry my tray to the table. He rushed out with my food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 484

You deserved it 3 608

By Anonymous - 04/08/2015 13:31 - Canada - Orangeville

Today, while trying to quit my horrible job at a pizza place, I got so nervous that I accidentally offered to work double my usual hours for another month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 820

You deserved it 15 950

By first time at McDonald's in months... - 27/03/2013 05:04 - United States

Today, I was at McDonald's. As I left the counter with the food, I heard the cashier mutter, "Fat ass." I turned around and demanded to see the manager. Once he came and heard the situation, he looked at me and said, "Well, it's not like he's wrong, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 241

You deserved it 19 353

By fatty - 29/04/2015 01:36 - United States - West Chester

Today, I was sitting in McDonald's. A lady came up to me and started complaining about the bad service, and asked for the manager. I told her that I didn't work there. "But you must, someone that fat has to work here!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 327

You deserved it 5 249

By Anonymous - 30/12/2010 15:37 - United States

Today, my mom thought it would be a good idea for me to talk with a British accent during my job interview to make me sound smarter. I'm applying for a job at McDonald's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 608

You deserved it 5 373

nikkon416 13

Saturday 11 January 2014 12:48

Was the caller having a heart attack?

shaytards_fml 9

Saturday 11 January 2014 12:51

it's back????

Comments

Morris9210 1

Wednesday 15 January 2014 19:44

funniest thing ever

LimeKoolAid 4

Friday 17 January 2014 10:41

Are you positive is back?

darkfireflame 15

Saturday 15 February 2014 16:30

"Try a McRib while I get your ambulance dispatched."

LifeTrolls 16

Saturday 24 October 2015 7:38

It's okay... I accidentally answered the phone by saying my family's dinner prayers...

Tyrax 16

Saturday 27 August 2016 1:44

Oops.

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Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 383

You deserved it 5 284

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 677

You deserved it 15 134

The Top

Today, my husband stood me up for his birthday dinner, that I'd made, in our house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 733

You deserved it 424

Today, my pet parrot learned a new trick. In addition to imitating my dog, and my voice when I call my mother, it can now imitate my sex noises, and likes to screech them whenever someone comes into the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 200

You deserved it 9 276

Today, I found out that my beloved guinea pig has impaction. For the rest of his life it will be my duty to clean out his rectum manually every month, or every week/day if it gets worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 588

You deserved it 5 305

Today, I found out that applying toothpaste to your penis to make it taste good for your girlfriend is not a good idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 485

You deserved it 80 883

Today, after months of putting up with it, I finally asked my manager not to put me on shifts with this old guy who is racist, sexist and lazy. This was how I found out that he died over the weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 666

You deserved it 1 741

Today, my ex-boyfriend from two years ago called and asked to come over. Still being in love with him, I agreed to see him but decided I wasn't drunk enough to handle the stress. After a while of drinking, he said that he really missed me and wanted to be with me. My reply consisted of throwing up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 700

You deserved it 31 842

Same thing different taste

I'm lovin' it

God's gift

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