Intimacy: Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare...

By gir - 14/07/2011 19:35 - United States

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 612

You deserved it 97 469

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Same thing different taste

Mortified

By killmenow - 21/02/2011 01:19 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 009

You deserved it 8 946

By Anonymous - 07/09/2009 21:20 - United States

Today, I ran into my parents bedroom after I heard my name and what sounded like painful screams. When I opened the door my parents were on top of each other laughing hysterically. They needed me to find the key to the handcuffs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 211

You deserved it 3 465

By Anonymous - 01/03/2011 16:21 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 059

You deserved it 45 891

Nobody's fooled

By sandy - 17/03/2009 21:25 - United States

Today, I was completely naked in my boyfriend's bed. Suddenly his mom yelled that she was coming in so that she could get to the attic. I pulled a blanket up to my neck, hoping she would think I was just cold. She had to step over my bra and panties on her way to the attic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 176

You deserved it 90 741

Pranked!

By RetroDayDreamer - 10/09/2011 15:46 - United States

Today, my parents overheard me having sex with my girlfriend. They thought it would be funny to barge in with nothing but underwear on. This has happened twice now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 444

You deserved it 28 885

By GoldenTornado11 - 10/05/2017 14:00

Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 144

You deserved it 559

Didn't see you there

By eatmyshipoopie - 18/12/2009 15:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend when my dad opened the door. I thought I hadn't been seen because the door was only open a tiny bit. I then looked into the mirror by the door to see my dad's reflection, staring at mine, horrified. I was on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 670

You deserved it 10 160

Excuse me

By Anonymous - 30/03/2015 10:30 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, my parents walked in on me, having sex. No, I wasn't having sex. They were. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 322

You deserved it 3 801

By Bear - 01/02/2009 17:38 - United Kingdom

Today, I walked in on my Mum and Dad having sex and didn't even realize what they were doing until she shouted at him to go harder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 440

You deserved it 6 000

By Anonymous - 15/04/2016 19:46 - United States - Bronx

Today, I got locked in my boyfriend's garage in my underwear while his parents ripped him a new one for having sex beneath their roof. His sister had to let me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 561

You deserved it 5 053

drummerboy957six 0

Friday 15 July 2011 1:23

that's awkward

KellyIsTheBest32 12

Friday 15 July 2011 1:26

are you 6?

Comments

Gerrito 0

Sunday 17 July 2011 16:44

You've got nothing to do, haven't you?

smileydancer92 2

Sunday 17 July 2011 18:44

scarred for life.

budd28 0

Monday 18 July 2011 0:13

fail.

tattooedcowboy 6

Monday 18 July 2011 1:27

i guess the smart part of your brain leaked down your moms leg : D

ChibiChips 0

Monday 18 July 2011 1:58

Scared. For. Life.

jerrod89 0

Monday 18 July 2011 3:01

damn i would of yelled help said u got stuck cuz somethin of urs went under there

ThatLovelyGeek 0

Monday 18 July 2011 3:10

IM even scarred for life after reading this.

dolphingirl00 0

Monday 18 July 2011 5:34

how old are you?

bigjoekickass 0

Monday 18 July 2011 6:07

should have joined

jkolsss 3

Monday 18 July 2011 8:48

ahahaha he dominated her nice choice of words shit go you had to listen the whole tim e

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The Top

Today, I was supposed to be working from home. Instead, I ended up taking the kids out to the park for the morning, because my wife “couldn’t even” today. When we got home, she had demolished two bottles of wine, and was masturbating to a home improvement show. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 044

You deserved it 326

Today, I was hungry and decided to nibble on some Cheez-Its I had in my room. After I'd enjoyed some of them, I looked into the box to see how many I had left, where I noticed a lot of little black moving dots. Apparently I wasn't the only one enjoying the crackers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 566

You deserved it 16 945

The Top

Today, I finally decided to go Christmas shopping. It's only once I arrived that I realized that I had forgotten my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 147

You deserved it 24 153

Today, I decided it would be funny to give my friend a peanut that had fallen on the floor. I hid it in his food, and started laughing when he ate it. It turns out he is allergic to peanuts. His family hates me now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 669

You deserved it 46 999

Today, my girlfriend hates my friends and I'm not allowed to talk or hang out with them. She keeps threatening my job. The only reason I'm still with her is because she will try and get me fired. She's crazy and so is the rest of her family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 523

You deserved it 615

Today, I sent a message to vent about my boring team meeting to the team group chat instead of to my friend. Everyone responded with a virtual slow clap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66

You deserved it 743

Today, I found out why my friends don’t invite me to Karaoke Thursday Nights anymore. Apparently, I act like a “show off” and “presumptuous” and make the others feel bad. It’s not my fault I have a decent singing voice. I guess they don’t like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 389

You deserved it 1 598

Today, I turned on my A/C for the first time in a couple of months. A family of ginormous cockroaches climbed out of the air vent and a few clumps of dead cockroaches fell to the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 120

You deserved it 485