Animals: Today, at 5:30 in the morning while I was fast asleep, my cat...

By cdn_steed - 23/04/2011 13:11 - United States

Today, at 5:30 in the morning while I was fast asleep, my cat decided the most threatening thing in my apartment that absolutely needed to be attacked was my left nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 971

You deserved it 4 660

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Same thing different taste

By scratchpost - 28/10/2010 12:07 - United States

Today, my cat woke me up by sharpening his claws on my breast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 925

You deserved it 4 622

By Anonymous - 14/01/2011 20:53 - United States

Today, while playing with my cat, she decided to give me a surprise nipple piercing with her claws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 252

You deserved it 5 274

Meow!

By patronuscat? - 05/10/2017 01:30

Today, I woke up in a guy's bed to one of his cats licking my nipples. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 622

You deserved it 1 061

Rise and shine

By Anonymous - 29/04/2020 08:00

Today, my cat woke me up at 3 a.m. by jumping from the shelf and landing on my nutsack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 547

You deserved it 281

Surprise, human!

By Anonymous - 22/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I didn't realize my cat was sleeping in the room with me until she decided to jump on me in the middle of the night, resulting in a critical hit to my groin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 372

You deserved it 98

By ihatecats - 01/12/2009 07:05 - United States

Today, I heard my cat climbing on the counters in the kitchen. To prevent a tremendous avalanche of dishes, I picked up the cat and put it outside. She got scared from the blinds and scurried away leaving deep scratches across my nipple. I wasn't wearing a shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 176

You deserved it 16 608

Bittie

By Alwayspotato - 11/07/2020 05:02

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend, he had his head on my chest and we both fell asleep. Suddenly, I woke up by my boyfriend biting my nipple, hard, in his sleep. I now need to go to the pharmacy because of a bleeding nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 537

You deserved it 155

Metal Cat

By Anonymous - 08/02/2021 05:01

Today, my cat jumped on my chest while I was sleeping and head-butted my nose to show she loves me. It was hard enough to crack it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 713

You deserved it 116

By ambushcat - 06/07/2012 03:31 - United States

Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 509

You deserved it 28 627

Kinky Crab

By Robert Herrin - 14/08/2018 18:30

Today, I fell asleep with my hermit crab on my bed and woke up to him pinching my nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 011

You deserved it 2 131

Doortje 29

Saturday 23 April 2011 19:43

Nipples are very dangerous things. Especially left ones. Your cat was just trying to look out for you.

randomboy18 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 19:37

that pussy just wanted some milk

Comments

nastyaames 0

Sunday 24 April 2011 7:33

mine once tried to breastfeed on me

killedmyteacher 0

Sunday 24 April 2011 7:49

kill that ******* kitty! who gives a **** if it was thirsty? cats suck! literally in this case.

Monkeybutt1 0

Sunday 24 April 2011 8:23

Mine does the same to my feet:(

spelly2650 0

Sunday 24 April 2011 8:42

I hate cats >:|

gotbiscuits 0

Sunday 24 April 2011 9:02

Touché

sunshine_today23 0

Sunday 24 April 2011 9:28

bahahahahaha!

Paigeyk 3

Sunday 24 April 2011 10:42

the cat just wanted to try what it saw other people doing to your nipples!

jessdanceaway 0

Sunday 24 April 2011 11:14

This kinda remind me when once my cat was sleeping on my lap I need to stand so I moved it, it got angry and bites the first thing she sees-- my boob

KaskStunter 4

Sunday 24 April 2011 12:02

I guess the cat didn't come with the house, you adopted it so ydi.

bunnixbrutality 5

Sunday 24 April 2011 13:57

hey little sparta! haha its a youtube thing

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I agree, your life sucks 588