Miscellaneous: Today, at the breakfast table my mum asked me what I thought...

By Anonymous - 12/08/2009 07:39 - Australia

Today, at the breakfast table my mum asked me what I thought about the plumber who came to our place a couple of weeks ago. I told her that I thought he was really cute and how hard I tried to flirt with him, she nodded and told me that he is her new boyfriend and might move in with us soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 284

You deserved it 5 988

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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By Anonymous - 13/03/2012 06:21 - Canada

Today, while I was looking for an apartment for my boyfriend and myself, he asked me how would I feel about his mom moving in together with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 391

You deserved it 2 614

By Noname - 06/02/2009 19:23 - United States

Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84 633

You deserved it 18 550

She's got it going on!

By Heartbroken - 08/08/2018 07:00 - United States

Today, my best friend told me he had a crush on someone in my house. I got excited, but he told me it was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 453

You deserved it 237

By Anonymous - 22/04/2009 14:09 - Hong Kong

Today, my mum and I were walking down a road where we met an old neighbour who recently got divorced. Her son who we hadn't seen for about 10 years was with her and he looked very handsome. I said, "oh wow ! your son has grown up so much !" The woman replied, "this is my boyfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 540

You deserved it 8 955

Mother knows best

By crushed - 29/03/2009 06:40 - United States

Today, I was hanging with my boyfriend. When his mom came to pick him up, he introduced me. She talked to me politely and I thought we hit it off very well. As I was walking away, I heard her say, "That's your new girlfriend? Honey, you could do so much better." FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 197

You deserved it 4 484

By Anonymous - 18/11/2011 11:17 - Canada

Today, my mother, her fiancé, and I were having dinner together. My mother was joking that she wasn't sure she could hold him down, as he used to "get around." She turned to talk to the waiter and my future step-father looked me up and down and winked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 040

You deserved it 2 599

By Anonymous - 12/12/2017 19:00

Today, I returned home from my honeymoon and met my dad for coffee. He told me he's been seeing someone and he's so happy. It's my new mother-in-law. They moved in together during my wedding weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 653

You deserved it 356

By Anonymous - 05/04/2011 18:48 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house and we were just about to kiss. Until his mum walked in saying his girlfriend was at the door. I thought I was already there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 866

You deserved it 5 294

Nice to meet you… again

By pleaseno - 24/07/2009 00:52 - United States

Today, my mother invited me to a nice restaurant to meet her boyfriend whom she's been seriously dating for a month. Imagine my surprise when she led me to a table and my boyfriend's father stood up, shocked, to greet me. Rather than being horrified, she is now planning double dates every week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 542

You deserved it 3 152

Coinkydink

By Anonymous - 21/01/2022 08:01 - Belgium - Roeselare

Today, my roommate told me he was bringing home his new girlfriend. When the arrived, he introduced me to… my longtime crush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 324

You deserved it 209

Lolbrittany 0

Wednesday 12 August 2009 16:04

AWKWARD TURTLE.

CDS09 0

Wednesday 12 August 2009 16:07

wow, thats awkward, so is your mom going for a younger guy or you an older? Either way thats just weird

Comments

flyingpan8 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 0:43

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA man, American trailer trash!

aback 4

Thursday 13 August 2009 5:46

Yeah, that'd be great except they say they're living in Australia.

doof_fisch 2

Thursday 13 August 2009 7:52

Just because he's a plumber doesn't mean he's going to plunger.

dyld921 2

Thursday 13 August 2009 17:15

THREESOME!

Supaspydaman 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 22:54

Oh! So this is how a Jerry Springer episode begins...

steveakafranxy 7

Saturday 14 May 2011 11:30

well said

Paige_Nicole10 0

Friday 14 August 2009 5:05

sure will be some awkward meals

fcked 0

Friday 14 August 2009 23:25

theres ur oppurtunity. dont let it slip

Poisonphaerie 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 21:52

That's great. haha.

A_pr3tty_bitch 0

Saturday 29 August 2009 2:06

YOUR MOTHER IS VERY STUPID!!!!!! WHATS NEXT WHEN HE COME LIVE WITH YALL , YOU GONE MESS AROUND WITH HIM AND BE ON THE JERRY SPRINGER SHOW

oliboi 0

Friday 26 March 2010 15:10

haha thats kinda weird. and mercyFML ur a fag. just throwing that out there

XxCrazygirlxX 0

Friday 16 July 2010 17:35

How olds ur daughtor?????

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The Top

Today, I was watching a movie with my new boyfriend. I got tired so I thought it would be cute to fall asleep on him. He woke me up and said, "You got me wet." Thinking it was a joke, I said smoothly, "That's what she said!" He replied "No, really." I looked down, I'd drooled all over his shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 314

You deserved it 40 787

Today, we are having work done and our chimney breast has a hole where a brick is missing. Well, my husband thought it would be funny to rig up some realistic spider leg things that would poke out of the hole next to my face. I had to wash the sofa cushion because I pissed myself from fright. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 94

The Top

Today, I demanded to know why my boyfriend even stays with me if he’s not interested in marriage or children, hates my family, barely talks to me when he gets home, and seems uninterested in sex. Apparently, the cheap rent on my flat was his sole interest in me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 708

You deserved it 297

Today, I was walking down my road in the hill-country of Texas, when I spotted something shiny buried in the dirt. Thinking it could be something interesting, I picked it up, and, after turning it over numerous times in my hand, realized that it was, in fact, an old silver bullet vibrator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 105

You deserved it 1 082

Today, one of the kids at the daycare center I work at was so excited at the fact that his constipation was over, he felt the need to bring me his fecal matter, in his hands, to show me. Guess who had to clean up the aftermath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 963

You deserved it 1 779

Today, out of pure boredom, I created a Twitter account. Looking for pages to follow, I found out that my long-distance boyfriend is actually someone's husband. A month ago he posted a picture of himself and "The love of his life", wishing her a happy 30th birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 161

You deserved it 169

Today, I was going for my morning walk, when a guy in a massive truck drove up beside me, with a kid no more than 4 riding shotgun. I lost my faith in humanity when his tiny voice yelled through the window, "Nice ass!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 305

You deserved it 5 086

Today, my fiancé decided that we shouldn't have sex before we get married. Even though we've been doing it for years. We can't get married right now due to Covid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 170

You deserved it 188