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By almost broke - 21/02/2016 13:24 - Czech Republic - Brno

Today, because my fiancé is criminally incompetent at budgeting, I'm now having to pay the first installment for my own wedding ring. FML
I agree, your life sucks 21 586
You deserved it 4 473

Same thing different taste

Top comments

expertsmilee 26

I understand how love is a complicated thing, but something in your brain has GOT to be saying this is a bad start and is probably a sign of how things are going to be going forward.

Comments

could be the tip of the iceberg as far as handling responsibility goes

love is not a piece of paper or a lump of carbon. get a serious grip on your fairytale illusions. life is what we make of it.

Queen_of_Night 20

Mine's not Carbon. It's a rare form of Ca2Al3(SiO4)(Si2O7)O(OH).

Gifts aren't the end-all be-all to love, but neither is having to pay for your own gifts.

Expensive engagement rings are stupid anyway. Just get a cheap (yet durable and meaningful) pair and avoid wasting 1-2 months of your salary.

I'm all for equality in a relationship and working together, but that isn't right at all.

It's one thing to have to pay for your own ring (I paid for my wedding band because my ring was more expensive and he had already bought the engagement ring) but to marry someone that is incapable of budgeting?? I wouldn't recommend it!! One of the biggest causes of relationship issues is money, and the stress that goes along with it. Besides, anyone old enough to get married should have a basic knowledge of how money works and how to budget!

Queen_of_Night 20

One of the worst mistakes I ever made was falling in love with a man who had no concept of a budget. Just don't do it OP. Get out while you can.

I don't understand why the man would have to be the one paying for the (engagement and) wedding rings in the first place. (Same for: Why would he have to be the one who proposes?) It's 2016, what about gender equality? Should I ever marry my boyfriend I'd make sure to split everything equally. Having the man pay for things is implying the woman cannot support herself and is depending on him.

kotake 7

I mean, weddings are sexist in and of themselves (quick example that "precious" moment of a father walking his daughter down the aisle + hands her to the groom actually means that part where the woman no longer belongs to her father but to her husband, not to mention outdated notions of sexual purity and the expectation of childbirth/care, etc. ) so i agree with your point. But that's more of a general, theoretical observation. For all intents and purposes, this specific fml's practical situation is that the fiance bought a gift for the other, (probably a very expensive one at that) and is now basically forcing OP to pay off their own gift. i think that would be equally douchebaggy regardless of the genders involved.

I thought the dudes (or whoever proposed) pays for the engagement ring and then you go halfsies on the wedding band.

I paid for my engagement ring because I make more money than my husband. At first I thought "I'm not really a ring person so whatever he can afford is fine." But then I realized since I wasn't really a ring person if I was going to suddenly start wearing one every day I should like it a lot. So once we were at a point where we decided we were ready to get engaged I did all the ring research and paid for it myself so I could make sure it was just what I wanted.

Looks like you'll be in charge of the budget once you're married.

Yes he needs to learn to budget his money but it's kind of sexist to expect the man to cover the costs. It should be split unless you are unemployed for some legitimate reason.