Love: Today, feeling desperate, I asked my dad for advice on how to...

By AnonymousUser - 05/05/2012 00:01 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, feeling desperate, I asked my dad for advice on how to get a girl. He asked me why I want to even date. I panicked and said I just wanted to make someone happy. He told me that if I wanted to make someone happy, I should "just start by getting a goddamn vasectomy". FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 270

You deserved it 2 736

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Same thing different taste

By i suck, this i know :( - 26/07/2013 22:11 - Malawi - Blantyre

Today, I went to my father for advice. I've been seeing a wonderful girl for the past month, and I feel terrible about it, because I already have a girlfriend. He said "Kill yourself" and that if I "can't even do that right" then to get out of his house, because he disowns me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 144

You deserved it 71 706

By theybitchaboutgnomesbutnotthis?? - 31/05/2013 22:25 - United Kingdom - Exeter

Today, thanks to an idiotic, "hilariously edgy" advert that screened in the very early evening, my 6-year-old son keeps repeating the phrase "I want a vasectomy" to everyone he sees. I've never received so many dirty looks in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 501

You deserved it 4 648

By Anonymous - 15/06/2014 21:29 - United States - Toledo

Today, I went to a Father's Day lunch with my dad and his fiancée. He suddenly began to describe, in detail, the vasectomy he'd just had, and that I shouldn't be expecting any new siblings any time soon. Thanks for the mental image, Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 985

You deserved it 3 897

By LuckySperm - 12/08/2011 13:14 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad told me that after my two older siblings were born, he got a vasectomy. However, something went wrong, and the vasectomy had failed, resulting in me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 422

You deserved it 3 137

Property dispute

By Anonymous - 19/01/2014 22:59 - United States - Dallas

Today, I asked my girlfriend's dad for permission to take her hand in marriage. He said no, because he doesn't want her marrying a "sexist idiot who treats her like property", which he thinks asking permission amounts to, then told me to grow up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 829

You deserved it 11 965

By Anonymous - 16/11/2014 00:04 - United States - Cleveland

Today, I asked my dad for advice. I recently got drunk and had a one-night stand. I feel terrible, because I'm engaged to a wonderful lady. My dad just said, "You did the right thing, son, keep it up. She's gonna steal half ya shit in the divorce anyway". FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 770

You deserved it 34 440

Surpriiiiiiise…

By Anonymous - 13/05/2022 12:00

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he might want kids one day, and he most definitely does not. In fact, he even thanked me for reminding him we need to stock up on condoms when we go shopping, plus he’s even considering a vasectomy just to make sure. I’m already pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 005

You deserved it 772

By Anonymous - 22/07/2010 06:44 - United States

Today, my girlfriend's father sent me a text message that simply stated "You ruined my relationship with my daughter." I wanted to ask him for his blessing to marry his daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 027

You deserved it 3 400

By CallaC - 15/03/2012 02:01 - Canada

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk. Almost before he could open his mouth, my mother popped her head into the room and said, "Be realistic, Dan. Who would want to sleep with that?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 505

You deserved it 2 898

Get on with it

By Anonymous - 11/01/2011 18:46 - United States

Today, my baby-crazy mother expressed her concerns that I haven't conceived after a whole two months of marriage. Her advice amounted to "get divorced while you're still hot, sleep around until you get pregnant, then marry the winner." When I complained to my father, he supported her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 383

You deserved it 3 173

FMLouis 6

Saturday 5 May 2012 5:32

That was a bit harsh

BruisedGiraffe 15

Saturday 5 May 2012 5:32

Ask if he can find you a coupon

Comments

1098765432 0

Saturday 5 May 2012 9:27

deserve it for letting him talk to you like that

soldiat_fml 17

Saturday 5 May 2012 17:57

"Why, Dad? Is this something you know from experience?"

Davick 0

Saturday 5 May 2012 18:50

I see it as a fatherly joke and a smart move. the worlds over populated anyways.

alera_fml 12

Saturday 5 May 2012 20:34

Don't listen to him. Girls like to feel like they are the only person in the world. So make sure that you are very interested in the girl before you make a move.

bubo_fml 10

Saturday 5 May 2012 21:34

You may not appreciate that advice now, but trust me junior, your ol' man is giving you pearls of wisdom!

KiddNYC1O 20

Saturday 5 May 2012 21:50

Wtf? Thanks, dad.

hateevryone 14

Saturday 5 May 2012 22:29

Such a dad answer

KaiserSD 8

Sunday 6 May 2012 0:11

It sucks, but it's true.

False_Stupidity 41

Sunday 6 May 2012 1:15

Don't go to your dad for advice he sounds like an ass of you want a girlfriend firstly start by smiling at girls wherever you go but don't spook them also be nice and chatty to all girls young old fat and thin to build up your confidence talking to girls