Miscellaneous: Today, for the third time this week, a telemarketer called me....

By Anonymous - 28/04/2013 13:57 - China - Shanghai

Today, for the third time this week, a telemarketer called me. Seriously annoyed, I told him in German that I don't speak English, in an attempt to get rid of him. He then started delivering his product pitch in German. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 890

You deserved it 12 559

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 20/04/2011 03:05 - United States

Today, I picked up on a telemarketer and started speaking in Portuguese. It turns out that this particular telemarketer spoke it as well. Every time I hung up, he called back. Telemarketers get really excited when they find out someone else speaks their language. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 521

You deserved it 10 459

Back home

By Anonymous - 30/12/2012 19:21 - Germany - Neunkirchen

Today, I returned to Germany for a break from my studies abroad. I got lost while out for groceries, so I tried asking a guy for directions. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners not bothering to learn the local language. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 045

You deserved it 5 367

By lonely loser - 22/08/2014 18:04 - United States - Seattle

Today, I was so desperately lonely that I begged a telemarketer not to hang up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 753

You deserved it 6 785

By Anonymous - 19/03/2009 05:17 - United States

Today, I got a phone call, and the person on the other line started speaking French. I assumed it was my friend since we usually speak French with each other, so I said in French "What do you want, asshole?". It wasn't my friend. It was a representative for the exchange program I'm applying for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 018

You deserved it 97 482

Communication Breakdown

By rosie - 08/03/2021 13:59

Today, I was unable to communicate with a customer who only spoke French. As a result, my boss called me a "monolingual idiot." I speak Spanish, German, and Japanese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 128

You deserved it 72

You can talk, mate

By Anonymous - 30/07/2019 12:07 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, a customer asked me if I was English, because I was struggling to understand what he was saying. I said yes. He then called me a liar, and said I must be "one of them Polish immigrants." Oh, and he also had a thick Scottish accent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 666

You deserved it 165

We all hate cold callers

By Adrian - 03/02/2022 14:01

Today, while working at my call center, I took a phone call. The guy on the other line just yelled "FUCK YOU!" twice at the top of his lungs before hanging up on me. But of course, the phone agent is always at fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 837

You deserved it 170

By Anonymous - 15/03/2012 20:08 - Canada

Today, a telemarketer called me and asked if they could speak to my "mommy or daddy". I am 25 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 421

You deserved it 2 794

By Anonymous - 02/09/2009 09:39 - New Zealand

Today, my boss rang me for the 5th time on my day off. Frustrated I pushed 'ignore' and yelled a string of obscenities at my phone. Turns out I pushed 'talk'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 564

You deserved it 50 938

By tazthespaz - 29/12/2016 03:18 - United States - Comstock Park

Today, a telemarketer called my house phone and asked for my grandpa. We were in the middle of having his wake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 200

You deserved it 388

OhDearBetrayal 25

Sunday 28 April 2013 19:13

See that's why it helps to know an indigenous language.

tacojauns 45

Sunday 28 April 2013 19:15

Why didn't you just hang up instantly like a normal person?

Comments

Raykyogrou03 12

Sunday 28 April 2013 19:28

From "China" why didn't you answer with a bad Chinese accent "no english" or "me no understand"

Calaraphea 16

Sunday 28 April 2013 19:33

This is why we unplugged our landline c:

delaneyluke 5

Sunday 28 April 2013 19:34

Ich bin nicht interessiert should have worked at this point

doodlecloud 26

Sunday 28 April 2013 19:37

You're lucky. That doesn't work where I'm from, ever.

smacky187 9

Sunday 28 April 2013 19:45

Thats when u hangup considering it's a damn telemarketer

Stefanie88 24

Sunday 28 April 2013 20:03

To me it feels like if you say that they try to push it on you even more by stating how truly spectacular it is.

aileen15 15

Sunday 28 April 2013 20:17

lmaoooo hilarious

sweetbabyjinkles 2

Sunday 28 April 2013 20:32

That's what happened to me; in French...

interesting33 36

Sunday 28 April 2013 20:34

Hahaaaa!! Kudos to the person phoning you though!

thew_fml 14

Sunday 28 April 2013 20:39

i just tell them i'm a paid consultant, and they can talk to me for $75 an hour

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The Top

Today, I came out as lesbian and introduced my new girlfriend to my family. My mom angrily told me that I should have waited until my grandparents had died before coming out, and that I was "extremely disrespectful" for making this announcement. I honestly thought everyone would be fine with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 096

You deserved it 1 169

Today, I wanted to show my friends my cat’s “high-five” trick. I held out my hand, and instead of a high-five, my cat scratched and bit me instead. I yelped, and my friends burst into laughter. I had to bandage my hand, all whilst they joked about “cat training.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 160

You deserved it 375

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 27 079

You deserved it 2 649

Today, I was finishing a bowl of ramen while watching a video. As I scooped up the last bits, I realized the clump of seasoning I had been saving for last was actually a dead fly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 434

You deserved it 640

Today, I was pulled over by my father who is a police officer. He was training a rookie and gave me a breathalyzer test to show his trainee how to do it. I blew a .15 and was taken to jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 946

You deserved it 151 294

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I agree, your life sucks 471

You deserved it 84

Today, I'm watching my brother's cat while he's gone. I'm a seasoned cat veteran, having been around cats my whole life, but I never thought I would ever have to say, "Bob, why did you jump into the trashcan again?" with complete seriousness. This cat is WEIRD. And I've seen quite a few oddball cats before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 657

You deserved it 194

Today, I found out that the small bugs I've been blowing off my pillow all year are in fact baby cockroaches. I discover this when I found two full grown ones crawling around and decided to Google it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 448

You deserved it 917